Meet the Family
by blu blade
Summary: Somehow when Roxas said, "Meet my family," Axel wasn't expecting an overprotective older brother and his psycho husband, a bubbly twin prone to pouting, a silver-haired ex, 3 annoying teen girls who want him nude and a pop star with a crush! Three-shot.
1. Meet the Siblings

**Title: Meet the Family**

**Pairings: Akuroku, Soiku, Zemyx, CloudxSephiroth, LeonxSeifer**

**Summary: Somehow when Roxas said, "Come for a quiet dinner to meet my family," Axel wasn't expecting an overprotective older brother and his psycho husband, a bubbly twin with a tendency to pout, a silver-haired ex-boyfriend, three mischievous teenage girls who keep trying to take a picture of his unmentionables and a pop star who wants to screw him underwater! **

**Rated: M**

* * *

They say that in every relationship, there is a climax, in which the relationship has two options. It can strengthen, or it can completely blow to fucking bits. 

And while the second option sounded visibly pleasing, Axel had to admit that he wasn't about to just let his relationship obliterate just because Roxas' family was completely and utterly psycho.

At this exact second, he found himself sitting at the Haiku's dinner table, all inhabitants eyes trained on him, waiting for an answer to the painfully awkward and no doubt humiliating question that had just been asked in relation to his and Roxas' bedroom activities.

And naturally, the first response that entered Axel's mind was something along the lines of "fuck off and mind your own damn business." But of course, saying that would lead him down the path of the second option of the resulting climax, and that would land him alone and with blue balls.

How did he work himself into this hole? Well, one could say it all started with a plane, a ring, and a crazy cow named Isabel…

* * *

**Then**

* * *

**6:10 p.m.**

Axel stepped into the Ansem the Wise Airport that morning, happy, excited, and just a little bit tipsy from all of the free alcohol they serve on first class. His emerald green eyes narrowed in search of the one person known to man that could make his heart speed up and slow down at the exact same time. His eyes zipped past the hordes of woman gaping up at him, through the airport restaurants, over the heads of the screaming children, and finally landed on his target.

Roxas Haiku, the blond and beautiful love of his life.

Yes, Roxas Haiku, the beauty currently surrounded by the beasts, a.k.a. horny single woman who wanted to be apart of the Mile High Club with Roxas as their pilot. Feeling a little put off that Roxas wasn't throwing himself in his arms like in the movies, Axel made his way over to his boyfriend, his gaze pointed dejectedly towards the ground.

Now don't get him wrong, Axel wasn't a sensitive person. Hell, Roxas was the uke; he was the overly sensitive teddy bear that cried one time when he told Axel he would be staying the night at Pence's house and might not see him in two days.

But still…there was something appealing in an overly romantic reunion, especially after being separated for exactly three months, two weeks, and six days. Not that he was counting. Sure, they talked on the phone every night and sent e-mails and text messages to each other nearly all day. And yeah, okay, they wrote overly sappy love letters just to make the separation more dramatic. But even with all of this, to be able to hold Roxas in his arms…it would be a dream come true.

Cell phone bill at the end of the month, and…just for the heck of it, add a trip to the emergency room for falling out of your chair: $2500

Scented parchment paper with pretty hearts bordering the edges and an 'I love you' memo on the bottom of the page: $25

Hershey's kisses and a box of Godiva chocolate: $35

Being able to run into the arms of the one you love after a long separation and what seemed like years of anticipation for this one moment: priceless.

Axel brushed this thought away quickly. Why the hell was he comparing his life to a Master card commercial? He was always doing this! Imagining him and Roxas in different romantic movie scenes…and in the end, he was always left feeling disappointed that real life just didn't measure up, you know?

As he got closer to the crowd, he could hear some of the comments of one of the girls trying to keep Roxas' attention.

"So, you said your name was Roxas, right?" One girl asked. He told them his name?!

"Uh, yes…why?"

Giggles. "Because I was wondering if you wanted to go to over to the Uno's by Terminal Three and maybe have some lunch? I can uh…make it worth your while."

He could hear Roxas' clear his throat. "I really should be heading over to the Arrivals gate to pick up my friend."

FRIEND?!

Axel clenched his fists angrily and turned on his heels. Fine, he saw how it was. He would go to baggage claim, order a taxi, go home, and call Roxas from there. He didn't need romance. He didn't need anything!

Okay, okay, so maybe Axel was a _little_ bit sensitive.

Heading over to the section where he knew his particular luggage was, Axel balanced on his heels, thinking about what he would do once he got home. Should he unpack, ignore Roxas, or make dinner? So many choices….

Axel was just about to reach down and claim his one overly packed red suitcase, when a familiar, musical voice froze his insides down to the core.

"Where the _hell_ do you get off?"

Axel stiffened and slowly turned around. He immediately wished he hadn't. There in front of him stood Roxas, his arms folded and his blue eyes narrowed so dangerously he might have been dead if he had heat-vision. But the one thing that rooted him to the spot, even as his luggage went whirling away, was the slight quiver of the blonde's jutted lip and the trembling of his small and fragile body.

It suddenly dawned on him. This is Roxas!

"R-Roxas?" Axel managed to choke out. That must have been it for Roxas. The boy jumped into Axel's arms, wrapping his legs around his torso and burying his face in Axel's sturdy shoulders. Axel could feel tears soaking through his shirt, but he couldn't bring it in himself to care.

"How could you leave me like that?" Roxas demanded cutely, his voice muffled by the fabric. Axel breathed in his sea breeze scent.

"You seemed busy, I didn't want to interrupt." Axel murmured into Roxas' hair, ignoring the looks they were receiving from the passer-bys. Roxas made an irritated sound in the back of his throat as they separated.

"Axel, those girls…we were just talking. That's no reason for you to just leave the terminal. Why didn't you just come over?" Roxas pointed out as he dried his eyes, watching Axel bend over and grab his suitcase. The little blonde resisted the urge to lick his lips.

"I told you; I didn't want to interrupt. I'm glad to see you, though." Axel replied, pausing upon noticing the direction of Roxas' eyes. He smirked. "I guess you're glad to see me too."

Roxas' eyes snapped up and he blushed. "Sure, of course."

Axel laughed and wrapped an arm around Roxas' shoulders. "Aw, I've missed you, Roxy baby."

Roxas melted in his arms. "I missed you too."

Of course, at the time, Axel didn't know that Roxas was about to completely screw him over.

**9:45 p.m.**

Axel gazed at Roxas over his wine glass, twirling its contents in a distracted fashion. Tonight was the night he was going to do it. Admittedly, Axel had wanted to do this for a long time now, but being away from Roxas, even for three months, had made him realize just how much he needed this blonde to be a permanent part of his life. So he was going to do it.

He… just had to work up the courage first.

"-and then they said, 'hey, Roxas, are you single?' So I ended up mentioning that we were dating and then they were like, 'hey, how about…" Roxas was blubbering with a slight flush on his face, waving around his fork as he spoke. Axel smiled affectionately. Roxas was adorable when he was excited and nervous like this. The question was…._why_? Why was _he _nervous?

"Which comes to an important question…I have to ask you." Roxas finished seriously, putting his fork down and locking his blue eyes with Axel's. Axel's heart just about stopped. Roxas was asking him the same question!

"That's good because I was going to ask you the same thing!" Axel exclaimed excitedly, reaching in his pocket and fingering the small little black box he had been carrying for about a year now. Roxas' eyes lit up, and he reached into his pocket as well. Axel's heart sped up.

"Let's say it at the same time; it'll be more romantic." Axel insisted, unable to wipe away the happy grin that was spreading on his face. Roxas nodded eagerly.

"Alright! Okay, one…"

"Two…"

"Three!" Both men whipped out the articles they were hiding. For Axel, he took out a beautiful diamond ring, one that cost him more than a month's salary. Roxas, however, ripped out an old, torn photograph of a large family.

"Will you come for a quiet dinner to meet my family?"

"Roxas Haiku, will you marry me?"

Axel and Roxas stared at each other incredulously. "_What_ did you just ask?!" They both cried out at the same time. The restaurant was silent, all eyes on the pair who was currently spewing out obscenities in surprise.

"Fuck, Roxas!"

"Shit, Axel!"

"Damn it"

"Oh, hell!"

"Son of a bitch!"

"I'm such a fucking ass-hole!"

Axel looked at Roxas sympathetically. "No you're not. I'm the ass-hole. I shouldn't have asked you that so soon, and-"

The expression on Roxas' face stopped him. He didn't look alarmed…in fact he looked…

"Hold on! I never said no, you dummy." Roxas pointed out with an eye roll. Axel gave him a blank look and for a second they just stared at each other. And then, a blindingly happy smile lit up Roxas' entire face, and this glorious joy caused the whole room to smile at them in awe.

"Ask me again." Roxas insisted, his eyes watering up slightly. Axel cleared his throat and walked over to Roxas, getting down on one knee and presenting him with the ring, opening the box as custom.

"Roxas Haiku, I love you more than I love myself. I love your perfections, I love your flaws, I love how you always babble when you're nervous, and the way you scold me and it seems like you're mad, but you're really just worried, I love the way scream out my name when we're making love, and I love the way you just_ look_ at me sometimes, like now….I love you. Will you marry me?"

The tears were rolling down his face like cataracts. "Fuck yes, I'll marry you Axel!" Roxas cried, throwing his arms around Axel. The restaurant erupted in applause.

And Axel was floating on cloud nine.

**10:30 p.m.**

"I still can't believe you said yes." Axel marveled for the fifth time since they were in the car. Roxas was driving, seeing how Axel was too intoxicated on love to do much of anything. The now engaged blonde rolled his eyes, but the smile had yet to vanish.

"Whatever, Pyro. I did. So you can shut up now."

Axel obliged. He would do anything for him now.

"I guess I'd better uh, give you some warnings." Roxas coughed, shifting in his seat. Axel, who had shut his eyes, opened one glittering green eye and narrowed it at Roxas in suspicion.

"For what?"

Roxas hesitated before shaking his head. "Uh…for my driving…?"

Axel gave him a disbelieving look. "You're a horrible liar. But…luckily…jet lag is catching up with me." The red head began to nod off slightly. Roxas sighed contently and gazed over at him. His fiancé was sleeping quietly, his soft ebony eyelashes fluttering against his pale cheeks and his breath coming out in short wisps.

Roxas melted again. Axel was so beautiful…it was unbelievable that he would choose him to be his husband. But that didn't matter. All that mattered was what is father would think…and that, was out of Roxas' control.

**5:35 A.M.**

"_This is the sweetest moment _

_This is what we both wanted _

_We are the same _

_But we're so different"_

When Axel's eyes fluttered open, the first thing he noticed was that…damn…they weren't in Kansas anymore. Which, okay, so they never exactly were since they lived in Manhattan; Axel lived in an apartment on 49th Street close to Broadway and Roxas lived in a condo with his roommate, a punk named Fayner or something, over near Union City. But still. His point was valid.

"_I un-tie your shoe laces  
We touch each other's faces  
We start to sweat  
And the sky turns red"_

Axel followed the melodic sound to see Roxas, singing like an angel as he drove with a happy little smile on face. He was still driving? But…Roxas had like, no sense of direction. Axel began rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. How long had he been asleep?

"_Tell me that you know  
Life's not fair  
If we're gonna make it  
Then we're half way there"_

Axel peered over the dashboard to gaze out the big sized window, and what he saw surprised him. Cows. Huge, fat, black and white cows. Just where the hell were they?

_  
"Tell me that you know  
That I really care  
I swear"_

"Roxas?" Axel asked out groggily, clearing his throat. Roxas didn't even look up. He just continued to sing whatever song he was singing about sugar or something. Axel bristled. He did NOT like to be ignored, and he _especially_ didn't like to not know where he was. He wasn't like Roxas; Axel always liked to know where he was going, not where he was from.

"_Let's melt the sugar!"_

"ROXAS!"

Axel shouted at the same time Roxas hit a high note, causing both to wince as Roxas' voice broke in a particularly embarrassing squeal. The blonde flashed him a glare before returning his baby blue eyes to the road.

"What? I was singing." Roxas huffed, letting a small pout make its way onto his face. Axel fought the urge to coo and comfort Roxas before his pride bitch slapped him. Be a man!

"And it was really beautiful, but do you think you could stop for one second and tell me where the hell we are?" Axel retorted firmly, proudly nodding to his pride. Roxas gave him a carefully blank look, one that Axel knew Roxas only used for when he didn't want to tell him something.

"We're in a car, Axel." Roxas snorted, rolling his eyes innocently like Axel was the stupidest person in the world. The red head rolled his eyes as well and turned to look out the window in frustration. A particularly determined cow was running next to the car, trying to catch up with them. The other cows were giving it weird looks before going back to eating the grass. Axel scoffed. Crazy ass hamburger.

"Uh, yeah, I caught that, thanks." Axel replied, stubbornly crossing his arms. He stole a glance at Roxas' face. It was cute in a sexy way, as always, but now it was torn between looking guilty, looking stubborn and looking annoyed. He was chewing on his lip furiously before he met Axel's gaze with a frown.

"Fine, I'll tell you where we're going."

"Where?"

"You really don't wanna know, though."

"I'll be fine, where the hell are we going?"

"My parents' house. To meet the whole family."

Roxas glanced over sharply at Axel when he fell silent. "Are you mad?"

Axel's eyes had widened in horror and his hands were clutching the door as if he was about to jump out at anytime. Nonetheless, the red head did manage to catch the flash of panic that had crossed Roxas' face, so he tried to pull himself together.

"It's just…I don't _do_ parents."

Roxas snorted. "Well, I don't _do _babies, so either you grow up and meet my parents or I drop you off right here next to that psycho cow- let's name it Isabel- and we never speak again."

And so, that's how Axel found himself completely screwed over…and about to meet Daddy and Mommy Roxas.

**9:00 A.M.**

Roxas' house was fucking huge. Axel had never seen anything like it. It was a huge farm looking house complete with animals loitering in the yard and a rooster perched on the top. But oddly, there was an apartment like quality to the house, like, from the outside, each level appeared to be its own little house.

"Remember, just breathe, avoid eye contact, and _don't mention anything about that thing I do to you late at night_." Roxas stressed, taking off his wedding ring with a frown. Axel smirked at the last comment, but then he noticed what Roxas was doing. Hey! He spent a lot of money on the ring, and he wanted Roxas to flaunt it dammit!

"Sorry, but…I'm not sure what Mom will do if she finds out I want to marry you before they've met you first." Roxas explained with a guilty smile. Axel returned it goofily. Roxas said he wanted to marry him! His mind turned to a big pile of goo.

Roxas and Axel, sitting in a tree! K-I-S-S-I-N-G! First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes…

"FOCUS! This is no picnic! Sephiroth will fucking _kill you_ if you're not careful!" Roxas shouted. Axel's bubble of little red and blonde haired babies popped. Roxas looked on the verge of a freak-out. Okay, big Axel needed to calm little Roxy down.

"Sorry, baby. I'll behave. Besides, aren't I the one who is supposed to be freaking out? Don't you worry about a thing. Just sit there and look beautiful like you always do and let me handle the irrational fear. Now let's go." Axel said confidently. Roxas just shook his head and followed him up to the door.

"_Sora! You give me back my wonder-bra right now!"_

"_I need it!"_

"_Oooh! Harder, Seph, harder!"_

"_Who ate the last fucking cookies? I made those with my sweat and tears!"_

"_Oh, God! That's fucking gross! Bleh!"_

"_Cloud! Demyx threw up on the kitchen floor!"_

"_No! Bad Pluto! Don't eat it! Damn it!"_

"_Can, uh, can we please stop with the language?" _

"_Sora! Do something, dammit!"_

"_Why, you seem pretty fine with doing something to Sephiroth. You're doing enough for the both of us!"_

Axel turned to Roxas with a hesitant expression before glancing back at the car. There was still time to save himself. Roxas scowled and brushed by him.

"Stop being a baby, Axel. Come on, they're not so bad!" Roxas explained, whipping out his key and opening the door. The smell of fresh chocolate chip cookies, barf, wet dog, and sex entered their noses. Axel's smirk dropped. Did a tornado hit their house? The interior was like a pack of pigs had a birthday party inside!

"It's Roxas! I'm home!" Roxas shouted happily. There was silence throughout the house until a joint cry of "ROXAS!" vibrated through the walls. What seemed like millions of pairs of feet hit the ground and the stairs, and Axel could feel a sense of impending doom frown upon him.

The first thing that knocked into him was a ball of brunette.

"Oh Roxas! I thought you'd never come home! Where's-" The ball of energy paused, staring down at the groaning figure under him. "You're not Roxas."

Roxas laughed and waved. "Uh, Sora? I'm over here."

'Sora' squealed and clambered up from Axel and into Roxas' awaiting arms. Axel blinked for a couple of seconds. That _thing_…it looked like Roxas with brown hair.

"Sora, this is my boyfriend, Axel. Axel, this is my twin, Sora."

Sora turned to Axel with a curious but contemplating look. He strode up to him and began poking him and prodding him in different places, causing Axel to widen his eyes at Roxas. What was he _doing_? Roxas just shook his head and winked.

Finally, Sora backed off and nodded. He turned to Roxas with a happy grin. "Alright, Roxas. He has the Sora sex stamp of fuckable approval! This guy is a hottie!"

Axel's jaw dropped. The _what _stamp of _what_?

Roxas burst out laughing, pointing to Axel's face. "Axel, don't look like that, that's a good thing!"

The red head opened his mouth to retort, until an earsplitting scream jerked his whole body. The scent of cookies surrounded the air, and a blonde young girl who looked kind of like the twins, in a way, came running down the stairs.

"Roxas! You're finally home!" The girl sobbed, rushing into Roxas' arms. She began to cry, causing Sora to snort and make his way back over to Axel, staring up at him. Axel reflexively took a step away. Still, it didn't stop the staring.

"What?" Axel finally snapped exasperatedly, as Roxas and the girl continued to hug. Sora just blinked up at him and shrugged after a moment's pause.

"Nothing. You're just really tall. And you remind me of fire." The boy admitted with a smile. Axel blinked for a couple of seconds before a slow smirk made its way back onto his face.

"_Really _now?" Axel loved fire…and for Sora to say that…it was touching…

"Sora, don't even get him started on fire." Roxas groaned. Axel snapped his eyes up to Roxas and winked.

"You know it turns you on. _Especially_ at night…"

Both Namine and Sora were looking curiously over at Roxas now, and it was Roxas' turn to blush and squirm under their stares. "Shut _up_."

"I'm Namine." Namine shyly introduced herself, holding out her hand for Axel to shake. Axel peered down at her. Boy was she fragile looking. Was it even safe to shake her hand? She wouldn't break into a thousand tiny little pieces?

"Oh, yeah, sorry Nami. Yeah, Axel this is Namine, my little sister, and Nami this is Axel, my boyfriend."

Axel took her hand and shook it softly, as to not spook her too much. He knew he could be a very intimidating looking guy. But before he could say anything to put her at ease, because she _seriously_ looked out of her element, he was greeted by another blonde, one of which was pointing a very wide sword in his face.

Axel glared at the attractive, spiky haired, older looking Roxas with bemusement. "Get that fucking sword out of my face."

The older sibling merely pressed the tip closer to his skin. "Who the_ fuck_ are you, and why the_ fuck_ are you in my house, touching my sister?"

Axel sighed, suddenly aggravated. See, this was exactly why he didn't _do_ parents, and why he _definitely_ didn't do older brothers. They were psycho!

"CLOUD!" Roxas shouted, angrily stomping his foot. "Cut that shit out! This is my boyfriend Axel!"

'Cloud' merely glanced at Roxas before switching his attention back to Axel. The latter sneered at him in annoyance. "Well? You think you can point your huge ass sword somewhere else?"

Cloud let out a deep breath and took the sword away, placing it in the holster on his back. He looked over at Roxas, who looked angry, disappointed and a little sad. Cloud softened and went over to Roxas, taking him in his arms.

"Sorry Rox. Overprotective brother mode took over again. My fault." Cloud whispered into Roxas' hair, giving him a tight squeeze. "I'm glad your home, though."

"I wouldn't worry too much about Cloud." Namine whispered shyly over to him and Axel gave her a grateful smile. "Really?"

"Yeah. It's actually Sephiroth that will chop up your Oscar Mayor Wiener." Sora added helpfully, pointing over at the stairs. "And he's right there."

"Axel, correct?" A dark, cold, calculating voice called to him, causing Axel's spine to stiffen in spite of the defiant smirk that remained on his face.

"Yeah, that's me."

"I truly do not care who you are. Just know that the blonde who attacked you earlier is mine and mine alone. He belongs to me." The tall, pale, quite gorgeous silver haired man informed him. There was no hitch or change of pitch. No anger. Just a simple statement. But Axel could damn well hear the psychotic-ness in his voice and the pure unadulterated _warning _that came across as nonchalance.

Axel made a face at Cloud. "You can have him. But Roxas…_he's_ mine."

Sephiroth gave him a cool look before merely walking past him, stopping to give Roxas a nod of acknowledgement, before making his way into the kitchen to make some 'Demy' guy clean up his mess.

Axel watched him walk off with a slightly bewildered expression. There was something…a little _off_ about him. He was so distracted in his thoughts that he didn't notice three girls creep up slowly behind him, to the amusement of Sora and Namine.

He did notice, however, the firm squeeze of his left butt check.

"Gah-hey!" Axel shouted, earning the attention of Roxas and Cloud. Axel swirled around to glare at three teenage girls, one blonde (which he assumed to be Roxas' little _little _sister) with a sleeked back high ponytail and an orange zip up shirt, a brunette with shoulder-length hair and a long purple skirt, and a high fashioned looked brunette with a strange Mohawk-like hairstyle and a short black dress.

"Niiiiice!" The blonde giggled, and all three burst into laughter. Cloud didn't seem to find it funny, although Roxas had a little smile on his face Axel didn't quite get the joke, either.

"Rikku, treat Roxas' seme with respect." Cloud scolded them. Axel didn't know who to glare at first- Cloud for being such a huge ass hypocrite or Roxas for snorting and looking amused at the 'respect' comment.

"Sorry Cloud." 'Rikku' apologized, rolling her eyes with the other girls. She thrust out a hand to Axel. "I'm Rikku. And behind me are Yuna and Paine. And we like hot guys. That means you!"

Axel took her hand and nodded his head hesitantly. "Right." He turned to Roxas with an exasperated look. Was that it?

Roxas smiled and shook his head. "No, you still have to meet Dem and then my mom."

Axel cursed under his breath, but Sora seemed to hear it. "Filter alert! Filter alert!"

"Weren't you the same guy who told me I was fuckable?" Axel retorted, peering down at Sora in amusement. The brunette squirmed under Cloud's glare and shifted his eyes to the side.

"I don't recall that."

Suddenly a tall blonde boy entered the room, sipping on some water, looking a little green. Axel's eyes bugged out of his head. Demyx?! The singer Demyx?! His last name was Haiku?! Demyx was one of _the _hottest singers out there at the moment, and Axel was a big fan of his work. Songs like 'The Kill', 'Rooftops', and 'Rebirthing' were a few of the major hits, but almost all his songs ended up as instant favorites.

"Rox! I didn't know you were back! How are you-" Demyx rambled excitedly, before pausing upon noticing Axel. Almost immediately some color found its way back into the singer's cheeks, and his excited, ill expression changed to an expression of sudden want.

"Hi. W-who are you?" Demyx asked with a slight stutter, ignoring the widening of all of his siblings' eyes. Axel didn't even seem to notice. All he noticed was that finally there was someone _normal_ in the family.

"I'm Axel. Roxas' fi-" Axel received an anxious look from Roxas, "Roxas' boyfriend. And you're Demyx, right? I didn't know you were related to Roxas; I'm a fan of your work."

Demyx laughed softly and licked his lips. "Thank you Axel. That's means a lot coming from someone like you."

Axel frowned in confusion. "'Someone like me?'"

"Someone so gorgeous."

There were so many mixed reactions in the house it was actually kind of...no. It wasn't funny at all. Axel blinked in surprise, Roxas growled, the three teen girls giggled, Namine sighed, Cloud shot Demyx a warning look and Sora just shook his head and went in the kitchen to get a cookie.

But Axel had survived. He had survived meeting Roxas' family, and that was all that mattered.

For now.

**11:00 A.M.**

Roxas was_ not_ happy.

Cloud nearly attacked Axel, Rikku and her little demon friends grabbed his ass, Sephiroth threatened him (don't think he didn't notice that), and Demyx fucking _hit on_ _him_. The _fuck? _What part of 'boyfriend' did Dem not understand? And it was so obvious that Demy had a thing for Axel since he just looked so _wanton_, and he stuttered like Porky Pig. Both were the qualities of a Demyx in love. Or worse…in lust.

The only two in his family who acted with any damn sense was Namine and Sora. But that was to be expected. Sora and Roxas were twins and therefore he knew what made Roxas happy, and Namine was always their favorite, and the trio went everywhere together. They'd even had the same friends.

Those two at least knew how to make Roxas happy. And the only way to make Roxas happy was through making _Axel_ happy.

And he could tell, even behind Axel's forced smiles and his fake little laugh, Axel was _not_ happy.

"Roxy…" Axel murmured, turning over in the sheets. At the moment, the red head beauty was sleeping peacefully in Roxas' old bed, uncharacteristically clinging to Roxas as Roxas would have done if reversed.

The blonde ran a hand through Axel's fiery red hair with a softened sigh. This was going to be a long visit.

But at least his siblings seemed to like him.

**11:00 A.M.**

"I don't like him." Cloud announced from his seat on the counter, ripping into a bag of Doritos with his teeth. Sephiroth rolled his eyes and continued typing away on his laptop while the remaining Haikus threw their snacks at Cloud in disagreement.

"You don't like _anybody_ Roxas brings home." Rikku pointed out with a frustrated sigh.

Cloud looked insulted and a little shocked. "What? That's not true at all!"

"Don't lie to yourself, Cloud. Remember Hayner? Then there was Seifer, Pence for a while, and then Riku. All of which had mysterious scars and all of which you didn't like." She commented lightly, shifting a little to give Yuna better access to her neck. "A little to the left, Yunie."

Yuna gave her a look behind her back but continued to massage her shoulders.

"I can't believe you would say that! I had good reason to dislike them being with my little Roxas!" Cloud retorted, folding his arms.

"Oh really, and just what reason was that?" Rikku scoffed. "This outta be good."

"Well," Cloud began, biting his lip in thought, "If I recall correctly, Hayner was a horrible influence on him, since Roxas had never gotten in as much trouble in high school as he did when he was with Hayner, Seifer treated him like shit and was a grade-A jerk except when he was stealing Roxas' virginity at night, Pence was too confused to really commit to Roxas, and Riku…"

Sora looked up from his cookies at once, staring at Cloud in interest. "Riku what?"

Cloud gave him an irritated look before turning back to Rikku. "Riku was-"

"The perfect boyfriend with the perfect ass." Paine deadpanned as all the girls in the room burst out in laughter. The men just stared at them. Sora finally cleared his throat and placed his hands on his hips.

"Don't talk about him like he's a piece of meat! Riku _was _the perfect boyfriend." Sora exclaimed. It was silent in the kitchen, before Demyx finally spoke up.

"Yeah…for Roxas. He was_ Roxas'_ boyfriend." He emphasized, putting away all of the cleaning materials he'd used for cleaning up his mess. Sora blushed and looked down at his feet.

"Y-yeah. I know."

"Oh, I think you're the_ last _one that should be talking, Dem." Rikku sneered, twisting out of Yuna's hands. "You're totally planning to take Axel away from Roxas!"

Namine gasped and placed her hand on her mouth. "Demy!"

Demyx's eyes widened and he shook his head vigorously, glaring at Rikku in immense irritation. "You don't know what the hell you're talking about, Rikku, as usual."

"Hey, would you guys quit it? How old are you guys again? Ten and five?" Cloud shouted, coming up to stand in between them. Rikku huffed and turned away and Demyx rolled his eyes and folded his arms.

"Hypocrite." Rikku muttered under his breath.

"Brat." Demyx murmured back.

"I said quit it!" Cloud roared, shaking the whole room, and even managing to earn the attention of Sephiroth, who was eyeing him in aggravation.

"A little quiet would be appropriate,_ Cloud_."

"Well, a little _shut the fuck up_ would be appropriate as well, _Seph_."

"What is going on here?!" An angry voice yelled above the following arguments, causing each Haiku to freeze in fear. Hannah Haiku. An _angry_ Hannah Haiku.

And trust the sons of daughters of Hannah Haiku: An angry Hannah Haiku was _not_ a happy Haiku.

"I get a tearful phone call from Roxas telling me that no one is acting like they have any damn sense towards his boyfriend. _What _is going on here?" Hannah demanded, looking every bit as scary as an infuriated Sephiroth.

"Nothing." They all chimed together, every pair of eyes turning to the ground. It was a well known fake that none of the Haiku's could lie. None of them could lie to save their lives. Hannah sighed and ran a hand over her forehead- a habit of stress.

"Look. I don't know what's going on, and I probably don't want to know. All I know is that you all had better treat Roxas' boyfriend with some respect. In fact, over the course of today, I want each and every one of you to apologize to Axel in some way."

"But I didn't even do anything wrong!" Sora squeaked, while Namine nodded her head in helpless agreement. Hannah pursued her lips and considered it before nodding her head.

"Alright, then for you two I want you to somehow welcome him home. If you all are going to live in this house, I want you to treat everyone with respect."

"Seph and I don't live here. We're just visiting." Cloud muttered.

"Yeah, and my apartment is under construction, that's not my fault." Sora added under his breath. The famous Hannah Haiku glare of death was shot in their direction and both Cloud and Sora squirmed uncomfortably under her glare.

"Never mind."

**

* * *

**

**Song Roxas was singing: Melt the Sugar by The Summer Obsession**

**A little something I've been working on...a three-shot! I want to expand my writing, and this is what resulted. So this is the first chapter to my three-shot, or three chapter story, and hopefully, after I post the next chapter to Klutz (that I know everyone's been waiting on), I'll post the next part as soon as possible.**

**If you can, please take the time to review. It really helps an author's abilities, and it gives them confidence. So yeah, please review!**


	2. Meet the Parents

**Oh wow, an update? As a matter of fact, yes, I have not forgotten about this story and have returned to finish it! I am so very sorry for introducing a story and not updating it for a year, but when I started writing Klutz, this story ended up taking backseat in my inspiration car. This is the second installment in the Meet the Family three-shot, and this chapter includes dinnertime, some of the "apologies", and tons of romantic akuroku scenes!**

**Thank you to:** happytears, Pandablubb, kellegirl, With a side of stereotype, AshleyPorter, Crimson Paw, You've been hit by, you. broke. a. promise, RowanWolf, yuki22lovers, StoicCrying, CrimsonChaos9, **and** flames04**. Your reviews were very encouraging and entertaining to read! I especially enjoyed the glass of milk from **yuki22lovers**, and the beaten kitten look from **StoicCrying** (you made me get my head in the game with that image!). I'm sorry once more for the wait.**

**P.S. Thank you to **Pandablubb** for pointing out a major flaw in the last chapter! I'm so glad you pointed it out-- Roxas' last name is Haiku, not Strife. Thanks **Pandablubb**!**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

**Then**

* * *

**1:35 P.M.**

"Alright, so here's the plan. Yunie, you start whispering dirty things into his ear. I'll take the pictures, and Paine, you keep that door closed, no matter what happens."

"I don't actually think this is a good-"

"Yunie, you're totally wrong. You _do _think. In this case, you just shouldn't."

"Rikku, I agree with Yuna. This plan…it's not very foolproof. We usually think this shit out."

"Well, _Paine_, we usually don't _apologize_, but we are now. So this is a good time to start new traditions!"

Using this reasoning, the two resistant girls both shrugged and followed Rikku up the stairs, and towards their brother's room, where they knew Axel would be staying. The leader, normally Yuna but due to circumstances, Rikku, did a little dance to herself in anticipation of what, uh…_creative _creation would stew from their apology.

**

* * *

**

"How did Rikku know?" Demyx asked his best friend Xigbar on the phone, lying back on his bed with a heartfelt sigh. He had retreated to the safety of his room after his big argument with Rikku, one that admittedly carried a true assumption.

It wasn't that he was planning to steal Axel away from Roxas. It was just that he…he _wanted _him; in the worst way possible. And true, being a singer meant he could have just about any fan boy -yes boy, he definitely batted for his own team- he wanted. But that was just it. He didn't want any of them. He wanted someone _different_. And Axel…he was different.

"It's always pretty obvious when you like someone, Dem. I mean, just think about when you had a thing for the lead singer of that one group." Xigbar paused as he struggled to come up with the name of the guy he was talking about. "It's right on the tip of my tongue."

Demyx rolled his eyes. "You mean Marluxia of the Hollows?"

"That's the one! When you first had a thing for flower boy-"

"That was their big thing! Flowers were their gimmick! And-" Demyx cut in only to be cut off in return.

"_Excuse_ me. Is your name Xigbar?" The man on the other side of the phone huffed in irritation. Demyx smiled wryly and turned on his stomach.

"No."

"Yeah, I didn't think it was either. And I could've sworn it was _Xigbar _talking. So yes, as I was saying, when you had a thing for Miss Flower Power 2009, everyone knew you liked him from the start, just by your reactions." Xigbar finished, feeling quite satisfied. Demyx frowned and reached over for his guitar, strumming it idly. It was what he did when he was confused, irritated, or just thoughtful.

"What do you mean? What reactions?"

"Well," Xigbar began thoughtfully, "whenever you get an instant crush on someone, you begin to stutter, you blush deeper than a red bell pepper, you spout random and cheesy pick-up lines, and you start acting all horny and sexy."

Demyx's mouth hung open and he gasped for a response. Finally, a question flew out of his mouth before he could stop it. "So have I…ever exhibited any of these symptoms towards you?"

Xigbar laughed on his side. "Ha, hell yes you have. But how could you not? I'm pretty damn sexy."

It was Demyx turn to laugh. "As if."

"Hey, _you're_ the one who was hitting on_ me_ a year ago, but hey. Who am I to come between you and your obvious denial? And that's_ my_ catchphrase you just used, babe. Anyway, I digress. Go apologize and win that boy's heart. Just don't let Roxas get to you, otherwise your ass is maggot food." Xigbar joked, bidding him farewell in the weird way that he always had done.

"Alright, I'll talk to you later. I'll call you once I'm no longer single!"

* * *

"And just why should I help you to humiliate him? He's done nothing to cross me. Or you for that matter." Sephiroth pointed out to Cloud as the blonde snatched up his laptop from where the cold silver-haired man had been working.

Cloud snorted and wrapped his arms around Sephiroth's broad, muscled shoulders. "When has that ever stopped you?" He asked, placing a kiss to the back of the other's neck.

"When the target belongs to someone I care about." Came the answer, causing Cloud to smack the back of his head in anger.

"What about me? Don't I rank higher on the 'I care about you' list?" Cloud cried, before he was forced painfully into the wall. Cold forest green eyes glared deeply into intense ocean blue ones as Cloud wisely shut up. Finally, Sephiroth spoke.

"Cloud…when, may I ask, have I allowed anyone else to touch me? When have I let anyone else steal my food, or run their hands through my hair when they think that I'm asleep, or take pictures of me because they want to make a scrap book? When have I ever allowed anyone else to even _top_ _in bed_?"

Cloud looked away and sheepishly muttered, "Never."

"That's right. Because, believe it or not Cloud, I care about you. I thought I made that evident enough at our wedding."

Cloud's face softened. "I know. I'm sorry; I guess I just go a little bit crazy whenever I see one of my siblings dating someone."

Sephiroth wasn't as soft. "I think they call that insecurity and irrational fear."

Cloud shot him an irritated look before flopping back on his old bed. "Whatever." He watched as Sephiroth gracefully lay down next to him. "So when do you have to go back to work?"

Sephiroth sighed and ran a hand through one of Cloud's sandy blonde spikes. "In three days."

Cloud sighed as well and gazed up at his old bedroom ceiling, where a big painted picture of his family and friends stared down at him.

"Then I guess we'll have to make the best of them."

Silence. And then, "Do you still want me to help you spite Axel?"

"Oh, you know it."

* * *

"So what do you think we should do to welcome Axel to our home?" Namine asked Sora quietly as they both sat in her room. Her walls were completely white, but pictures she had drawn of her favorite people and her favorite memories adorned the walls. It was simple, but Sora liked it.

"I dunno." He offered helpfully, leaning back on his arms and staring up at the ceiling fan. Namine sighed. She had no legitimate ideas either.

"Well baking is out of the question, since neither you nor I can actually bake anything other than chocolate chip cookies. On the off chance that we convince Rikku to do it for us, we'd be in her debt, and that's just a chance I'm not willing to take."

"I dunno." Sora repeated again, closing his eyes slowly. Namine pursed her lips and tapped her finger against them. There had to be something…

"Wait a minute. Didn't Riku Nioki have a cake baking business?" Namine asked Sora in a burst of sudden inspiration. Sora's whole body jerked with a start and he found himself face-down on the floor. Namine had the decency to look alarmed.

"Sora! Are you alright?"

Sora groaned and sat up, holding his forehead in pain. "Did you say Riku Nioki?"

Namine hid a smile behind her hand. "Yes, I believe that's what I said."

"I-I think he did, but I'm not sure. Maybe I should call him? Maybe?" He offered with a nonchalant shrug. Namine nodded encouragingly. "I think you should."

A blindingly happy smile lit up his face. "Alright, I will!"

Namine watched with an uncharacteristic smirk as he ran out the room.

Ho yeah, this was _so _going to work.

* * *

If there was one thing Axel wasn't, it was a wimp.

You know what that meant? That meant that he could handle this. He could handle the brats, the overprotective psycho lovers, and the other insane, crazy, anti-Roxas relatives that lived (or in some cases- were just visiting) in that house.

Why? Because of the amazing prize: Roxas' hand in marriage. So he was going to do whatever it took to have that. It meant the world to him. And he wasn't going to give it up for anything. To have Roxas by his side…forever…would fill the missing puzzle piece in his heart. It would complete him as a person. It would make him so blistering happy.

So if Roxas wanted him to sit here on their fluffy off white couch and have a painfully nerve-wrecking conversation about what he did for a living, then fine, he would endure.

For love endured all!

At least…that's what they said.

And no, Axel didn't know who '_they'_ were, who the hell cares?

* * *

**Now**

* * *

**1:45 P.M.**

"So, _Axel_…oh, I just love saying your name!" Hannah Haiku giggled, leaning over and rubbing Axel's leg for the hundredth time. _Okaaaaay_…well, he couldn't really decide whether or not she was hitting on him, or just being encouraging, but he was leaning on the first. He wasn't conceded or anything-

"What do you do for a living?"

-it was just that, well, it was weird! He already had this strange feeling that Demyx had been hitting on him earlier, but he always tried to convince himself that when people were hitting on him, they were just being nice. Well, except for guys he was interested in. Yep, guys he was interested in, he went the extra mile for. For example:

Roxas (shy and nervous around hot guys): _"Uh…hi. I'm…I-I'm Roxas, and I…I was wondering, well, hoping that uh, maybe you'd want…you'd want to go out with me…maybe? Sometime?"_

Axel (clever and pretending to be dense): _"Sure, cutie, I'll walk out with you! Don't be embarrassed, you have no idea how many sexy blondes have asked me that exact question. I mean, man oh man, I never would've thought people would be so paranoid about walking outside of a store alone!_

Roxas (no longer shy after hearing the stupidity): _"…you're lucky you're so damn sexy. Anyway, look. I'm asking you on a fucking date. You interested in me or not?"_

Axel sighed dreamily. Roxas was so perfect. And thinking back, he was so damn smart for coming up with an idea like that. The first time he saw Roxas stammering and realized he was interested in him, he knew he had to be slick.

"Axel! My mom is talking to you. Wake the hell up!" Roxas suddenly snapped, and he blinked. Oops? So sometimes he liked to daydream! Sue him! Sure, it was mostly about Roxas but, still. It wasn't really distraction as it was…intense Roxas-itis. Anyway, Hannah glared disapprovingly at Roxas.

"Don't talk to your boyfriend that way." Then she turned to Axel again with a smile. "I was just asking what you did for a living."

Axel laughed nervously. Did it really fucking matter? He was getting his money, right? He glanced over at Roxas, who was squirming uncomfortably on the loveseat, not listening at all. Ugh…damn him.

He placed his attention back on his mom. "Uh…well, err…I guess you could say I'm a businessman?" He tried catching Roxas' eye again, but he was still shuffling on the seat, crossing his legs and then uncrossing them and back again. Huh, that was weird. It almost looked like he had a…

Axel swallowed thickly and suddenly it felt too hot in the room.

"Sweetheart, are you okay?" Hannah asked Roxas in concern, patting his leg. The blonde shot out of the chair as if he had been burned. Heh, guess the horny young blonde didn't want his mother to touch him in this state.

He licked his lips. That was okay, he would gladly do it for her.

Then he mentally slapped himself. Wait…he couldn't have sex with Roxas. That would be the ultimate act of disrespect to the Haiku's. Think about it; if he had a house, would he really want…say, Rikku to have sex in it with her little boyfriend? Hell to the no!

"I'm fine, I just need some water." Roxas said pointedly, gazing at Axel intently. He pretended as if he didn't see it. Maybe if he acted like he wasn't watching, Roxas wouldn't try and jump him. Because, really, his stamina wasn't all that great; he wasn't sure how long he'd be able to hold out with Roxas all alone and horny.

Finally Roxas sighed and grumbled as he went the opposite direction to the bathroom. Hannah watched him go in confusion before giving Axel a sheepish giggle. "He's going to the bathroom, not the kitchen. He must have forgotten the bathroom was over there."

Oh, he hadn't forgotten, Axel knew. He knew exactly what Roxas was going in the bathroom to do.

"So Mrs. Haiku," He began sharply, to stop himself from going in the bathroom to help Roxas, "where's Mr. Haiku?"

Hannah gave him a trilling laugh. "Oh, he's probably still at his hunting class."

Axel froze. Hunting?

Damn it, he _hated_ parents! He _already_ had a crazy feeling that Roxas' dad absolutely, positively would not like him at all. Parents just never did. Maybe it was the hair.

Or the pyromania.

"And afterwards he's heading over to his tracking lessons, aim class, and I'm pretty sure he's going to sharpen his sword out back before going inside for dinner when he gets home!" She continued, crossing her legs gracefully as if they were discussing Thoreau versus Paine.

Axel stared at her in horror before Namine came wandering into the room, holding a camera in her hands. She gave him a shy smile.

"Hi Axel….can I take your picture?" She ventured, biting her lip in half-nervousness, half-friendliness. Axel softened. This girl was going to make him change from Muhammad Ali to Jigglypuff. Who could deny this girl of anything?!

"Of course. Do you want me to pose or something?" He asked, but without waiting for an answer he kicked both of his legs off the side of the couch he was sitting on and laid out, giving her an exaggeratedly sexy look. Both Namine and her mother giggled.

"No, I actually just need you to give me a smile or expression that represents you." She explained softly, still smiling. "Just…be yourself."

He raised an eyebrow. Be himself…? How did one act like themselves? He had no freaking clue how to be himself when he was trying to be himself. Or something. Did that even make sense?

"Why don't you just take one of me when I'm not paying attention?" He offered, settling back into the cushions. "That way I'm not struggling to _pretend_ to be sexy and charming."

Roxas suddenly came stomping in the room, looking equally pissed and equally embarrassed as he shoved Axel's legs off the arm of the couch and plopped down next to him. He gave the redhead a pointed glare, one that had him looking away in guilt. Hey, it wasn't _his_ fault that _he_ couldn't control his sexual urges!

"So what were we planning for today? Better yet, we aren't doing anything for tonight, are we?" Roxas demanded, sending another pointed look in his direction. "Axel might be busy."

Hannah laughed merrily. "We're going to have family dinner, of course!"

Both Namine and Roxas froze, and that's when a terrible, _terrible_, monstrous feeling settled in the depths of Axel's heart. This was going to be a long day.

If he made it out alive, that is.

"So where's Cloud? I haven't seen him around since this morning." Roxas asked, accepting Axel's arm around him as an apology of what he just had to do…_alone…_and in a small, cramped bathroom, no less. Hannah shrugged.

"Beats me. Maybe he's working on his apology for Axel." She offered thoughtfully. Both Axel and Roxas gave her questioning looks, and she giggled. "I may have ordered them to all say that they were sorry to Axel."

Roxas groaned and slapped his forehead with his hand. "Aw mom, none of them ever say sorry!"

Was that true? Axel groaned as well. Then that meant that their apologies would be anything but. He could just imagine what they were all planning to do…

_Cloud and Sephiroth held up Axel's body with the tip of their swords. Blood gushed from the open, unearthly wounds that were scattered all over his body, and he groaned in uttermost physical, and mental, pain. Rikku and her friends merely giggled._

"_We're sorry!" All of Roxas' siblings chanted as they all began to roast him over a fire. Namine was taking pictures of his torture with a little smile, while Sora danced eccentrically around the pit of death._

_As the fire began to eat at his skin, he let out one shaky, fearful cry. _

"_Roxas!"_

Axel popped out from his imaginative image. That could _definitely_ happen! Well…not really…but still! That was obviously a metaphor…or a vision from the future…that things here would not end well! He needed to get out of here while he still-

"I love you, Axel." Roxas whispered in his ear, and that's when he noticed that not only were Hannah and Namine no longer in the room, but his lover had somehow managed to climb on top of him when he wasn't paying attention!

The feel of Roxas' hot breath in his ear while admitting his love for him brought him harder than he had ever been with anyone else at any time of his life. Oh god, if only he knew just how badly he wanted him right now. He hadn't touched Roxas in three months…not in the way he _wanted_ to. The way he _needed_ to.

Axel kissed the back of his ear, eliciting a small giggle. He was ticklish there. "I love you too, Roxas."

"How much?" The blonde demanded cutely, sitting back on his lap and folding his arms. Briefly, Axel noted in awe that Roxas' strength was so great that he could remain balanced just using his thighs. Damn, that was sexy, but it wasn't enough…

"Enough to know that we aren't having sex." He answered, and Roxas groaned and hopped off of him. Please, did Rox think that he was stupid? The redhead _knew_ Roxas, and he definitely could see that coming.

"Can't we at least talk about this like consensual, horny adults?" The blonde pleaded, and Axel shook his head. Nope; Roxas was persuasive as hell. Besides, it wasn't like he didn't _want_ to have sex, so it was kind of obvious who would win _that_ discussion.

"No." He replied with authority, and that was the end of that. Roxas sighed excessively and threw his body over Axel's legs so he was looking up at him. He scowled, and Axel smiled. He missed that look.

"When did you get so bossy?" He wanted to know, peering up at him in suspicion. "Nothing happened while you were gone, right?"

Axel frowned. "Of course not. I'm in _love_ with you."

At that proclamation, Roxas pulled his head down by his shirt and kissed him.

Kissing Roxas was always a different experience for Axel with each kiss. Each touch of their lips was new to him, and even more exciting than the last. He smiled slightly into the gentle mesh of their lips. Roxas was being cautious; timid. He wasn't sure if his feelings had changed. Smirking, Axel pulled away.

Roxas opened his eyes in surprise, but upon staring up at Axel, lowered them. "You didn't…you didn't like it, did you? I'm sorry, I-"

Axel pulled Roxas to his feet, and in one fluid motion dipped him backwards. The look he gave Roxas was intense; passionate. "Of _course_ I liked it, Roxy baby."

And with that, he gave Roxas a smoldering, fire-filled kiss.

"Hey! What the fuck are you doing?!" Someone suddenly shouted, and Axel accidently dropped Roxas in his startled jump. A quiet, masculine voice laughed, accompanied by a deep chuckle before the voices faded down the stairs and out the door.

Roxas growled as he pulled himself up and gave Axel a dirty look. "Gee, thanks for that."

"Ah, sorry, something startled me. My fault." He apologized, pulling Roxas back into his arms. "Let's start over."

Hannah's voice unexpectedly called for him in the other room. "I have more questions!"

Seriously? What more could this women possible want to know?! He wasn't that spectacular…

"You'd better go." Roxas hinted, pushing him slightly into the kitchen. "She doesn't like it when people don't give her immediate attention when she asks for it."

Axel sighed, gave him one last little kiss, and went into the kitchen.

**3:45 P.M.**

Roxas was watching Axel like a lion on steroids watching a gazelle.

If there was one thing he knew about himself, it was that he loved sex. It was just an accepted part of him. Sex, to him, was like what a canvas was to an artist, or what a piece of paper was to a writer. Sex was where he could be himself; where he could channel his creativity and just release it.

So the fact that Axel, his canvas, or, sometimes, for lack of a better word, his bitch, didn't _want_ to have sex while they were here, was making him very, very…well, pissed off.

He hadn't had sex in three long, _long,_ masturbation-filled months, and ever since Axel proposed, he'd wanted to show his undying love and well, lust, for the man. But Mr. High And Mighty didn't want to "disrespect" his parents. Which, okay, admittedly made sense. But when you were as pent-up as Roxas was, trivial things like _respect_ didn't matter.

And he wasn't one of those jerks who took his irritation out on his family. But he wasn't one of those good, innocent little children who kept their feelings bottled up inside either.

Exhibit A:

Sora: Hey Rox, do you want a piece of cake?

Roxas: What flavor is it?

Sora: Uh, I think it's….

Roxas: Does it taste like Axel?

Sora: Um…no…?

Roxas: Then no Sora, I don't want a fucking piece of cake.

So as indicated, he didn't really take his anger out on other people. Much. He just didn't like to hide his feelings. Besides that, he never got to spend any time with Axel now. The man had been sleeping the whole time he'd been here!

He also hadn't even really had a chance to see Sora -other than the previous conversation, but that was just him passing by- or Namine either since the introductions. After his mom got home, the infamous Hannah Haiku, and laid down the law with all of his siblings, they'd been individually locked up in their rooms, trying to figure out some way to "apologize" to Axel. Roxas snorted. Ha…as if Cloud, Rikku and Demyx had ever apologized in their lives.

"Earth to Roxas!"

Suddenly Roxas was brought out of his thoughts and back to reality by a hand waving itself back and forth in his face and an arrogantly loud voice calling out his name. Ugh, he knew who it was. And what was he doing here anyway?!

"Riku," Roxas scowled, raising his eyes up to aquamarine ones, "what are you doing here?"

Riku laughed and pulled his hand back, instead using it to give him a cheesy bow.

"I come where beckoned, my lord." Riku announced with a fake English accent. Despite himself, Roxas cracked a small smile before quickly chasing it with a frown.

"And who, may I ask, beckoned you?" Roxas demanded, placing his hands on his hips and giving him a stern look. Having Riku here normally wouldn't faze him all that much. There weren't really any bad feelings left between them since when they broke up, the feeling was mutual. But now that he was engaged, secretly, to Axel, things were different. Roxas had only talked about Riku briefly, but that was during his asshole phase, so they weren't…kind things.

Riku leaned down and grinned, popping Roxas' on the nose with his index finger. "That cute little twin of yours." He straightened back up again, ignoring the way Roxas was simmering in annoyance. "Where is he, by the way? I haven't seen him in person since your Halloween party last month."

Roxas' cheeks reddened at the mention of the party, and Riku, the annoyingly perfect asshole that he was, noticed.

"You remember the party, right?" Riku asked casually, slinging an arm around Roxas' shoulders and squeezing him closer to him companionably. He made his voice lower. "You know, the one where we made out in the closet for fifteen minutes?"

"_What_?"

Roxas and Riku both jerked away as Axel came into view, looking more than a little pissed off at seeing Riku touching _his_ Roxas. Riku's grin faded, and Roxas coughed, struggling to fight down his blush and trying to casually smooth down his clothes. Great. This was just what he needed…Axel catching him swooning over Riku's perfection.

"Oh, hi! You must be, uh, Axel? Mighty fine catch you got here." Riku chuckled nervously, scratching the back of his head awkwardly and taking yet another step away from Roxas. Axel narrowed his eyes at this…this…admittedly godly man.

"Who the hell are you?" Axel demanded, taking a threatening step towards Riku and cracking his knuckles. Roxas laughed nervously and rushed over to his secret fiancé, placing his hand gently over Axel's clenched one.

"Axel, this is Riku, my ex-boyfriend. Riku, this is my boyfriend, Axel." Roxas introduced, his eyes darting between Riku and Axel. They finally landed on Axel while his hand tenderly rubbed against his fist. "Sora invited him, apparently. Isn't that just the weirdest thing?"

The red head merely grunted in response. Roxas chewed on his lip out of sheer habit. He really hoped Axel wouldn't be pissed at him for this, because he really needed a good fuck, and soon. He scowled. Why the hell did Sora invite Riku anyway? Sure, so he knew that Sora had a crush on Riku, who didn't? But Sora had never been bold enough to make a move on him, so what caused the change now?

He shook his head. Something was going on with that twin of his…with all his siblings actually. He really hadn't even spoken to any of them since the initial introduction disaster…and he knew that Axel would probably agree that that's what it was. Because of the deer-in-the-headlights look that he had been sporting, Roxas hadn't had the heart to tell Axel that there were two more siblings he had to meet, a cousin, _and_ his father.

"Weeeeell, I better go find Sora now. He's expecting me. I'm actually late…" Riku tossed Roxas a sheepish smile at the unsurprised expression on his face, "It's not my fault this time! I had an unexpected cake request for a funeral!"

Roxas took this as a chance to sneak away. "Right, Riku. Because people really want to eat your sickly sweet strawberry cakes at a funeral." He called over his shoulder, casually slipping from Axel's line of sight. He'd give him a while to cool off before forcing him face first against the wall. He liked taking Axel when he was completely focused.

"Yes, in fact they do! I plan to have cake at _my_ funeral!" Riku yelled back, but Roxas had already turned around the corner. That left him alone with Axel, who was now leaning against the wall with his arms crossed, giving Riku a speculative once-over.

He fidgeted slightly under his unashamed gaze. Nervously, he tried to make a joke out of it. "You know, when Roxas and I were together, I was pretty, um, possessive over him too. I used to have to tell his ex-boyfriends to leave him alone."

Axel smirked and pushed himself off the wall. He started up the stairs to Roxas' room before stopping and turning to raise an eyebrow at Riku.

"That's the difference between you and me. Because I'm _not telling you_…cake boy." And with that, Axel left Riku alone to contemplate that little statement in his mind. Riku sighed. Great. Sora just _had _to invite him at the same time Roxas was introducing his new boyfriend. He growled. He'd just have to punish Sora. And he knew exactly how…

**3:50 P.M.**

Axel entered Roxas' room, the room he'd be staying in while Roxas' slept with Sora, and plopped down on the bed with a sigh. He'd been asleep ever since the initial introductions with everyone, and just about five hours later he was still tired.

It wasn't really his fault he hadn't been sleeping well, though! It was just about impossible for him to sleep without Roxas next to him, and for the last three months that's just what had been happening. But that was alright, because at least now the blonde was in his proximity.

Yawning, he stretched his arms over his head, perfectly content to fall asleep again, when cold metal hit his wrist, and a _clack! _was heard. His eyes widened as they landed on his hands and his jaw dropped in disbelief. He was fucking handcuffed to the bed!

"Smile for the camera!" A shrill, bubbly voice giggled, and his eyes shot forward only to land on Rikku, Roxas' fucking kid sister. What the hell...?!

Axel growled. He never had been good with kids. How old was she anyway? Twelve?

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" He demanded, flailing his arms to no prevail against the headboard in some kind of attempt to free himself. Paine, Rikku and Yuna all shared amused looks.

Rikku pouted at him. "Such bad language! And here we are just trying to apologize to you!"

Axel mockingly laughed before fixing her in particular with a scowl so fierce, she knew it had to have rubbed off from Roxas. "I don't give a flying fuck what you're trying to do. I've only had about five hours of sleep in three months, you guys grabbed my ass, I had a freaking sword shoved in my face, and now…all I want to do, is rest my eyes a little bit, you know, recharge my batteries. I want to look my best for your father."

Yuna made a sympathetic sound and went over to sit by Axel's side. "Oh, you poor thing. It can't be easy meeting all of these blonde, blue/green-eyed freaks at once."

Rikku glared at her, but a wryly smile was on her face. "Gee, thanks Yuna." And surprisingly, against all reason, Axel began to laugh. The three girls all looked at each other in confusion before hesitantly joining in, not wanting to get in even more trouble than they knew they would be.

"Ahh," Axel sighed as he wiped his eyes. Time to play the reasonable card. He gave them a tense little smile. "Alright, now, how about it? How about letting me go?"

Rikku shook her head. "No can do, Clifford. If we don't apologize to you, Mom will have our necks and cook us for dinner."

"You think she's joking, but she's not. Last Tuesday she got very close to being served to us for dinner." Paine piped in, causing Yuna to giggle a little at the truth of it all.

Axel sighed and pointedly struggled against his binds. "Um, yeah, that's nice. Can we focus here, please? Why am I tied up for you to apologize? What, you don't think I'll listen to it, or something?"

"No, silly. This is us apologizing." Rikku explained happily, crawling up from the edge of the bed to straddle Axel's hips. "See, what happens is, Yuna's going to pose you and get you in the mood, and we're going to take pictures. Once Paine does some Photoshop magic on them, we're going to use them in a sex book as a gift to Roxas. And…heh, we all know how Roxas is when he gets horny. Which, finally, ends up as a gift to you!"

Axel was speechless. First of all, he didn't want some freaking ten year old whispering dirty things in his ear. It made him sound, and _feel_, like a dirty old pedophile! And he'd heard enough of _those _comments to make him sick of the word. Second of all, he didn't like the thought of pictures being taken of him. Who knew where those would end up?!

And third of all…it was creepy for Rikku to have such an active interest in Roxas' sex life.

Really, really creepy.

"Alright Yuna, time to begin!" Rikku announced, breaking him out of his panic. Oh no…no, no, no…this wasn't happening to him. These fucking brats were going to make the whole world see him as some straight pedo leech!

"Wait, we're seriously doing this?!" Yuna cried out, suddenly afraid. "I mean…is this considered, like…sexual assault?"

"Yes." Axel answered quickly, smelling her fear. Yes, that's it, feel guilty, feel bad. "And I would hate to have to call the police on you three after you do your sexual bidding."

Truth was, he wouldn't really call the cops on his fiancé's siblings, because Roxas' family was his family. But if this was a way for him to escape…it couldn't hurt to inflict some irrational fear, right?

Rikku paused slightly. "Wait, what?"

Axel sighed helplessly and flopped down. He rolled his head dramatically. "I'll have to tell them that I was handcuffed to the bed roughly. They even-" He sobbed, "-wanted to _kiss_ me! Can you _imagine_ the cooties, officer?"

"Kiss you _where_?" Rikku asked with authority, her good nature combined with her fear making her play along.

"Where do you _think_, officer?" Axel wailed to the imaginary police officer, and then suddenly turned to her. "Go ahead. Take me." He whimpered.

"Maybe this isn't a good idea after all." Rikku announced, glaring at Yuna. "Yunie, why didn't you stop me?!"

Yuna gaped while Paine rolled her eyes and silently went about unlocking Axel from the bed. Axel hid a smirk. That's right, do as you're told.

As the last lock unlocked, Axel grinned. These girls, while with good potential, did not meet up to his standards of deviousness. Ha, he invented the handcuff-to-the-bed bit! They didn't know who they were dealing with, and it was high time for the children to get out of the game.

"You aren't going to tell on us, are you?" Rikku demanded as she turned off her camera. With the three girls watching him warily, he considered. Well, that might get him extra brownie points with Hannah but…Axel was no snitch. Besides…he kinda liked the brats.

Well, _like_ was a strong word.

"Nah. Just get outta here. I'll tell Roxas that I bought the handcuffs for him." Axel agreed, wincing as he said the words. Ugh, Rox was so horny right now that _he_ would probably handcuff him himself.

"Thanks, Axel. And I promise that we really were just trying to apologize." Rikku explained innocently, all three pairs of eyes widening at him. Axel melted slightly. Damn, looks like Roxas taught them well.

"Yeah, and to try and stir up trouble." He mumbled, but he gave them a smirk. "Now go, so I can take another quick nap before Hannah makes dinner."

Sighing in relief and giggling, the three girls quickly left the room. He sighed loudly. Jeez, _that_ was a nuisance. But whatever. It was over now, and it was time to get a little R and R before another freak demanded his attention.

**4:15 P.M.**

Axel must have only been asleep for about half an hour or so when he received a soft knock on his door. Thinking it was Roxas- or maybe just hoping- he groggily mumbled, "Come in."

He expected Rikku and her posse again, or Roxas, or even Sora and Namine, but who he didn't expect to see was Demyx, Roxas' brother and _only_ Axel's favorite singer.

"Uh, hey." He started, frantically rubbing the sleep out of his eyes and straightening his hair with his hands. "What's up?"

Demyx, looking pretty hot in a slim pair of dark wash jeans and a tight blue-green shirt, cocked his head to the side and smiled sheepishly. "Oh, I just wanted to apologize for this morning."

Axel looked away from his sexy idol and propped two pillows back on the bed. "Apologize?"

Demyx took a couple of steps into the room and sighed. "Yeah. It was completely out of line for me to think that kind of stuff. It's just so hard not to when you're in the room."

Now he straightened the comforter. "What kind of stuff? What do you mean?"

Demyx scowled when Axel didn't look at him. How was he going to win him over if he didn't even look him in the eyes? "Well, it's impossible to think of anything besides how sexy you are when you're in proximity."

Axel froze from where he was still turned away from Demyx. Ah, crap. He scrunched his eyes shut. He _knew_ he was hitting on him earlier. Damn…what should he do? Any wrong move and Roxas might think he's interested in him or something.

"Uh, thanks, but I, um, I better go check on Roxas." He said slowly, giving him a pointed look. "You know, my _boyfriend_ and your _brother_."

Demyx paused, a little caught off guard, but quickly regained himself. "Of course. But hey, you have to let me make it up to you sometime."

At Axel's hesitant expression, he added, "I'll tell you what, I will take you to this club I know to see one of my performances tomorrow night. That way, you're not tied down to me, I don't have to keep up with you, and everyone goes home happy."

Axel mulled it over as the offer's internal countdown chimed in his head.

Five…

It seemed perfectly logical; there was no way Roxas would be upset about something like that.

Four…

Besides, it wasn't a date. But then again…Roxas was pretty possessive…

Three…

It'd be fine. He wouldn't want to shun an apology. And he did love Demyx's music.

Two…

Was there a downside to this?

One…

"Alright, sounds great." Axel agreed, giving Demyx a quick grin before walking out the door. He poked his head back inside. "And this isn't a date, right?"

Demyx scoffed exaggeratedly. "Of _course_ not! Now go check on Roxas."

Axel smirked and bounced out of the room. Demyx watched him go with his own smirk. See, this was perfectly normal. Just two guys going to a club together, while one listens to the poignant, emotional lyrics of the other; ha, he doubted Axel would even know what was about to hit him.

**4:25 P.M.**

Sora shifted from one foot to the other, before scuffing his toe on the kitchen floor. He paced back and forth, up and down, and eventually resolved to just sit on the counter. Not a second later he jumped down and resumed his foot switching.

"Sora, what are you…are you bored?" Riku finally demanded incredulously, the pacing and foot shifting growing his own patience thin. Sora stopped walking and looked over at Riku, who was calmly sitting at the kitchen table, mixing some frosting, in amazement. _Of course_ he was bored! Who wouldn't be bored, just waiting and waiting and waiting…?

"How do you _do_ that? You're just _sitting_ there, all perfect and composed! Doesn't the waiting bother you?" He cried out, letting his whole body slump against the back of Riku's chair. "Who designed this torture device?!"

Riku snorted. "Torture device? Sora, it's called _preheating_. You have to warm up the oven before you-"

"Well I'm not a _pre_tending to be _pre_occupied in all of this…_pre_meditating!" He retorted, grinning to himself in triumph. There, the genius could take that and suck it!

Riku rolled his eyes. "That didn't even make sense."

Sora stuck his tongue out at him. "A burn is still a burn, no matter what you call it."

"Sure…hey, come here and take a look at this cake design. I want to be sure I'm making the right one for you." He said, grabbing Sora's wrist and pulling him down into his lap. The brunette blushed deeply. Oh god, oh god, he was sitting on Riku's lap! Which was the closest he was ever going to get to touching his-

"Hey, did you hear me?" Riku's voice suddenly asked sharply, breaking into his thoughts. Sora frowned at his tone. Ugh, who was he kidding? Riku, the super smart genius and expert cake maker that he was, probably thought he was the stupidest guy on the planet.

"Huh?" He asked intelligently, smacking himself in his mind. This wasn't helping!

"I asked," Riku sighed, shaking his head at him, "if you prefer the orange cake, or the chocolate cake with velvet cake swirls."

Sora shrugged. He didn't care all of that much; part of him had just wanted Riku to come over. "Well, he looks like fire, I guess, so the orange one."

As Riku scribbled some notes down in his journal, Sora thought of the redhead who had come to visit. Well, there was no doubt in anyone's mind that he was sexy- flaming red hair, smoldering green eyes- but there had to be more than that for him to be worthy of Roxas. It wasn't that he didn't trust his brother's judgment or anything; he just worried that he was settling too soon for too little.

Sora grinned. He made it seem like Axel and Roxas were engaged!

"What are you smiling at? We have work to do!" Riku demanded, pretending to be stern as he stood up, inevitably sending Sora tumbling to the ground. The brunette frowned up at him.

"Why are you so mean to me?!' He whined, picking himself- and his pride- off of the ground and dusting himself off. He followed Riku to the refrigerator like a lost puppy.

"I'm only mean to you because I like you." Riku answered unconcernedly, taking out the ingredients from the fridge. "If I didn't care for you, I would probably just ignore you completely."

"So it's either be bullied or be ignored?!" Sora exclaimed incredulously, but something inside of him clapped happily at Riku's words. So he _did_ like him! He even said that he cared for him! This was way better than any stupid orange cake!

**4:30 P.M.**

Roxas and Namine watched Sora and Riku flirt with little grins on their faces. It was about time their little brother got in touch with his flirtatious side! Roxas snorted and nudged Namine from their position behind the door into the kitchen.

"Did you have something to do with this, my sweet and innocent little sister?" He demanded playfully, grabbing her hand and pulling her onto the couch with him. "Are you going back into the matchmaking business?"

Namine smiled sweetly. "I don't know what you're talking about."

Her brother rolled his eyes. "Yeah right! This has your work all over it!"

"Well…if the shoe fits…"

Suddenly the door opened, and Roxas' Dad, Sam Haiku, strolled in, being tailed by a sulking brunette with an even angrier blonde on his arm. Roxas stood up quickly and fixed his clothes as his dad glared seriously at him.

"Roxas."

Roxas shuffled his feet. "Dad."

A tense moment passed with everyone in the room before Roxas and his dad both gravitated quickly towards each other. Roxas threw his arms around his dad, and he caught him with a laugh, swirling him around happily. Tears seemed to pool in the older man's eyes.

"You're finally home." He laughed, squeezing him tighter to his chest. "My boy is finally home!"

Roxas felt the air whoosh out of his lungs. "Alright dad…can't…breathe…" His father was just too strong for his own good.

"Ah, sorry." His dad mumbled as he set him back down. "So what's been going on with you? How have you been?"

Roxas opened his mouth to answer when his dad thrust his two accompanying guests into his face. The blonde sighed. Oh great, look who it was this time…

"Hey Roxas. Seen Cloud around?" Leon asked miserably, ignoring Mr. Haiku's wide, goofy and oblivious smile. "After I finished working on your dad's sword, he insisted on bringing me here. Really. He _insisted_."

"Uh no, I haven't seen Cloud since this morning. But…uh, good to see you." Roxas grinned devilishly, loving the way his smile made Leon frown even deeper. Then he glanced at the blonde practically hanging on his arm. "You too, Seifer."

Seifer winked at him. "Anything for you, kid."

Roxas shuffled his feet and raised an eyebrow as he looked away. This wasn't awkward at all. His dad dragging in _Cloud's_ ex boyfriend and ex best friend who was dating _Roxas'_ ex boyfriend, who was now hitting on him. Not awkward _at all_.

But just to make things even more pleasant, Axel bounced around the corner, seeing Roxas and breaking out into a wide, sexy smirk. Roxas almost came, seriously, in front of his dad and all of those guests. He was _that_ horny, and Axel was just that sexy.

But he must have lit up brighter than he intended, because his dad suddenly glared suspiciously at Axel. "Who are you?"

Axel's face fell. The time had come for him to be neutered and eaten raw. "I'm Axel, Roxas' fia-"

"Boyfriend!" Roxas interrupted loudly, cutting Axel a harsh side glare before smiling pleasantly back at his father. "Dad, this is Axel, my boyfriend. Axel, this is my dad, Elliot Haiku."

Mr. Haiku's good nature had somehow seemed to vanish when they weren't looking. He pinned Axel with a stern, dangerous look, a look Axel had pretty much come to expect. Who was he kidding? There just wasn't a father alive that would like him, no matter how desperately he wanted them to. And this wasn't any old dad, either. This was the man who had given birth to his soul mate.

Well, metaphorically.

To put it simply, Elliot Haiku was a man that mattered to Roxas. And anyone who mattered to Roxas mattered to him. He had to put his best foot forward, and try to convince this man to allow Roxas to belong to him.

"It's nice to meet you, Axel." Mr. Haiku declared gutturally, his voice dropping a couple of octaves with authority. For a second there, as Axel took his hand to shake it, he had a feeling that maybe…just maybe…things would work out all right. That maybe Elliot Haiku would accept him with no qualms. But the second his glance went to his flaming red hair, he knew his chance was shot before he said another word.

"The hell is wrong with your hair?" He demanded, and Seifer burst out laughing. Even Leon smiled a little behind his scowl. Roxas rolled his eyes and slid his hand into Axel's. Lord knows his boyfriend was going to need _that_ little bit of comfort around his family.

"Dad..." Roxas warned, his eyes narrowing at him pointedly. But Elliot just shrugged and motioned for them to all follow him into the living room. "Let's go in here and wait until dinner is ready."

As Axel slowly followed the men into the living room, he noticed Rikku, Yuna and Paine setting the table while Hannah and Namine gave the finishing touches to the dinner. Instead of suffering with Roxas' dad, he should be in there, helping them with dinner! At least it looked safe in there!

"Um, maybe I should go see if Hannah needs any help…" Axel trailed off hopefully, giving Roxas a desperate look. His blonde beauty simply ignored him and pulled him down next to him on the couch. Axel sighed. He knew what that silence meant. It meant _no_.

"Why do you want to go in there? It's just the women doing what they're meant to be doing." Mr. Haiku snorted while Roxas slapped his forehead. Axel's eyebrows shot way up. Holy shit, was Elliot one of those traditional old farts who thought that women were only good for sex and cooking?!

Damn, Roxas' family was more twisted than he thought!

"You mean they're only meant to be in the kitchen?" Axel asked slowly. He didn't want to make any rash judgments before he could clarify what he meant.

Elliot Haiku sent him the coldest glare he had ever seen; a glare that chilled him to his very core. "No, I meant that women are meant to enjoy every aspect of life, including making wonderful masterpieces, because everything a woman touches is beautiful. What the hell did _you_ mean, saying that women are only meant to be in the kitchen? Is that what you think Roxas should be doing? Spending all his time slaving over a hot stove cooking all of your damn meals-"

"So dad, Axel actually cooks for _me_. I can't cook to save my life, as we all know." Roxas interjected, laughing obnoxiously in his nervousness. "Right, Axel?" He added, trying to soothe the angry beast that was arising next to him. Axel looked _pissed_ that Elliot had implied all of those things, and Roxas wouldn't be able to stand a fight between his father and his fiancé.

"I think anything you make is special, even if it doesn't always taste that good." Axel muttered, annoyed, but unable to do or say anything that would hurt Roxas in the long run, like offending his father. But Elliot Haiku had better fucking watch what he said to him. He had begun to tread dangerously close to the edge there, a second ago.

Roxas sighed disappointedly and let his head flop onto the back of the couch. What a disappointment this day had been! No one seemed to like Axel except for Sora and Namine, but he suspected they only liked him due to his looks! What the hell was wrong with his family? Why couldn't they see the sexy, brilliant man that he had fallen in love with?

The front door suddenly opened, and Cloud and Sephiroth walked in, looking suspiciously pleased with themselves. Well, at least until they both noticed Leon and Seifer sitting on their living room couch.

"Leon! What are you doing here?" Cloud gasped, his voice colored with surprise and badly concealed pleasure. Sephiroth said nothing, but merely cut a cool glare to the brunette residing on the living room couch.

"Leaving." Leon groaned in embarrassment, standing up despite the protests of Mr. Haiku, quickly being followed by Seifer. Cloud blinked in astonishment before stopping him with a shy little grin and a head tilt. The brunette seemed to freeze at the look.

"I missed you, Leon." He admitted, and Roxas threw up his arms. Axel glanced back at his lover. What the hell was going on? Not that he minded. This was providing great entertainment until dinner; quite frankly, anything that didn't involve him being rudely interrogated was okay in his book.

"He's doing it again." Roxas mumbled, and Axel nudged him. "Doing what?"

"Unconsciously stringing Leon along; how is the man supposed to move on when Cloud is giving him meaningful looks and lighting up whenever he's in the room?" Roxas whispered, frustrated. "If you ask me, he needs to stay with the man he _married_."

"When we get married," Axel breathed into the blonde's ear, making him blush, "you won't have time to get excited for anyone else but me."

"Uh, thanks? What am I supposed to say to something like that?" Roxas hissed back, pushing him away from him. Axel mock pouted. Roxas needed to shut up and let him be the only one to love him. Where he was concerned, there was no such thing as a love triangle. It had to be _him_ all the way.

So it was selfish. Love's selfish. But who cares? It was _Axel_.

"I, uh…missed you too, obviously." Leon replied gruffly, avoiding the murderous look Seifer was shooting him for admitting such a thing. But Sephiroth's look was much more vicious, considering he was practically glaring into his _soul_ with those calculating and disbelieving eyes; disbelieving that he actually still cared for _his_ husband.

"We didn't get a chance to talk after the wedding." Cloud said softly, taking a step towards him, but Sephiroth moved swiftly in front of him, pushing him back roughly, but not rough enough to actually hurt him. Cloud made a move to protest, but one sharp glance from his husband was enough to silence him.

"Yes, typically contact is difficult during a _honeymoon_." Sephiroth snapped, and Cloud scowled at him, despite a blush forming on his face. "And quite frankly, I simply cannot find it in my power to allow _my_ newlywed to speak to the man who attempted to ruin our wedding."

Leon growled at him and his hand rested on the handle of his gun blade dangerously, but just when things were about to get good (well, in Axel's mind), Hannah quickly rushed into the room, the entire situation diffusing instantly at the presence of a female.

"Dinnertime!" She announced, smiling as if she didn't notice the impending fight or the thick tension in the room. "Time to learn all about Axel!"

Axel's mood, which has been becoming considerably better with each comment made between Sephiroth and Leon, deflated so quickly, it alarmed Roxas next to him.

Would this day ever be over?!

**6: 00 P.M.**

Axel glanced down at his watch. Time of death, six o' clock. Just by the way everyone was staring at him from where he was sitting next to Roxas let him know that these were his last moments of life.

"Oh stop." Roxas muttered, rolling his eyes. "You're being too dramatic. No one's even looking at you."

Really? He glanced around the table hopefully. Mr. Haiku was glaring at him, Mrs. Haiku was beaming widely, Rikku and her crew were giving him mischievous smirks, Cloud was taking out his frustration by sneering at _him_, as was Leon and Sephiroth, Seifer was flicking pieces of his napkin at him, and Demyx was giving him these sexy, pouty looks! The only ones who weren't staring at him were Sora and Riku, who were too busy flirting with each other, and Namine who wouldn't look _anyone_ in the eye, let alone him.

Axel sighed. He missed the days where he was with Roxas, just the two of the alone, when his life didn't consist of having to spend three months on business or being eaten by the Haiku's.

"So Axel," Mrs. Haiku began, smiling pleasantly down the table at him, "won't you do us the honor of saying grace?"

Roxas snorted. "Axel's an atheist."

Suddenly what seemed like a thousand pairs of eyes descended upon him, all glaring at him in distaste. Damn Roxas.

"So what do you think happens when you kick it?" Rikku asked him bluntly, and Mrs. Haiku quickly hissed, "_Rikku_!"

"Well," Axel began loudly, scowling at Roxas, who teasingly blew him a kiss, "I wouldn't really call what I believe in atheism, despite what Roxas likes to believe."

"What _do_ you believe in, then? You think we become _trees_ when we die?" Seifer demanded incredulously, and Leon gave him a warning growl before looking at Axel in what one could assume was acceptance, but Axel knew to be indifference. "Don't mind him. Ignorance is his strong suit."

"Yeah, I picked up on that." Axel replied smoothly, smirking slightly at Seifer's indignant snarl. "Anyway, this can't possibly be good talk when the food remains ungraced!"

"Amen to that!" Demyx agreed enthusiastically, giving Axel a thumbs up that somehow morphed into a naughty symbol. Axel coughed, looking away while Roxas slammed his fork and knife on the table forcefully, causing Demyx and most of the table's inhabitants to jump.

"_I'll _bless the food. Everyone, bow your heads and clear your minds, especially if they are like _someone's_ here," he sent an annoyed glower in Demyx's general direction,  
"and are in the gutter."

Seifer started to chuckle, only to be silenced by Leon's tight grip on his thigh while the rest of the family just seemed straight up uncomfortable. Axel couldn't blame them. Roxas wasn't exactly…possessive…but he wasn't one to back down from something he wanted. Or from protecting something that _he_ had that someone _else_ wanted. Ugh, he knew coming here was a mistake.

"…and finally, please bless the food, and the flawed, annoying, boyfriend-stealing people eating them. Amen." Roxas finished, opening his eyes and smiling innocently. Mumbled "amen's" went around the table as he and Demyx frowned at each other competitively.

"Well!" Mrs. Haiku suddenly butted in, once more breaking the tension. "Let's eat!"

Now here was the best part of coming to meet Roxas' parents! The food! Axel waited to get his helpings of the food patiently; he watched enough movies to know that just reaching for the food would be rude. Mr. Haiku seemed to notice, and gave him an approving nod before passing him the corn. Well, at least that was one thing he did right!

Sora watched the food passing in impatience. It always took way to long for him to get any food, especially when there were guests. As soon as the corn reached Riku, he reached for it almost instantly, forgetting completely that his crush had yet to grab his own helping. Riku looked at him as if he'd lost his mind.

"Are you trying to cut me?"

Sora blinked. What? He didn't even own a knife. "Huh? I'm not trying to shank you."

Riku paused, rolled his eyes, opened his mouth and closed it before trying again. "No, I meant trying to cut me in line. The food line."

"Oh…sorry." Sora offered up, blushing. He didn't want Riku to think he was rude! Axel groaned internally as he watched their cute exchange. Young love was painful. See, he and Roxas were at the point in their relationship now where if he reached for Roxas' corn, he would end up starving for the rest of the night.

"So, Axel…what do you do?" Namine asked, politely turning away from the flirting that was going on next to her. Axel smiled at her and prepared to answer before a slight nudge from Roxas reminded him that his job wasn't exactly…well, legal, but what he meant was, it wasn't a…peaceful profession.

"I'm in…business…right Roxas?" He chuckled anxiously, turning to his lover for assistance. Roxas, who was right in the middle of taking a huge bite of his turkey leg, froze at Namine's pleasant yet curious look. He glanced at Axel once before setting his turkey down and joining in on Axel's laughter.

No one else joined in.

"Why yes, Nami, Axel does…business." He answered after he finished his edgy laughing. When Cloud raised a dubious eyebrow at him –really, what had him so wired? –he took a huge bite into his food to stop himself from speaking.

Axel couldn't help but grin at him. Even though he was about to screw himself over, he couldn't stop the affection that flooded him for the blonde next to him, even if he was a terrible liar and one of those people who laughed when they were nervous.

"What kind of business?" Cloud practically demanded, earning himself a harsh warning look from Demyx, who was about tired of his brother being openly hostile to _his_ man.

"Oh, you know, just the normal business like things…" Axel dodged, purposely avoiding the answer. Cloud narrowed his eyes at him. He didn't trust him. Obviously.

"Prostitutes do normal business like things too. Are you a prostitute?" He deadpanned. The moment the words left Cloud's mouth, pandemonium broke out. Mr. Haiku dropped his fork while Mrs. Haiku gasped and performed a quick little prayer on his behalf. Namine and Demyx immediately choked on what they were eating and simultaneously blushed at the thought at Axel as a prostitute, while Rikku and her gang burst out in giggles. Sephiroth simply raised an eyebrow in indifference, while Leon and Seifer both chuckled, although they tried to hide it by coughing loudly. Riku and Sora just rolled their eyes; they were used to Cloud's antics, but Roxas…it was his reaction that Axel really watched for, despite his annoyance at the older, blonde nuisance.

Roxas, after watching his family's outburst, glared at everyone before finally pushing his seat out and leaving the room without another word, looking pissed off and hurt that his family would do this to Axel, the _love_ of his _life_, for Christ sake.

At that point, everyone seemed to die down and started looking ashamed of their behavior, especially Cloud, who started it in the first place. Axel felt no pity for them. Oh, so they felt bad now? Well they should!

"Well, way to go Cloud." Rikku snapped, rolling up her napkin and lashing it at him like a wet towel. He glared at her but said nothing. A wise decision.

"I'm going to go talk to Roxas." Namine announced, scooting out of her chair. "Please excuse me, Axel."

Axel shrugged. Eh, it wasn't like he was going to say, "No, stay here." Why was she even asking him?

But…that was probably what he should be doing anyway. He didn't want Roxas to be upset…technically he should have thought up a lie for his occupation _before_ sitting down to dinner. Damn. Why did he only think of these things _after_ he needed them?

"Yeah, I better go check on him too." Axel muttered, preparing to stand up when Mrs. Haiku stared up at him, looking alarmed. Her expression made him pause. No? Was he about to make things even worse than they already were?

"Oh no, please Axel, please stay. Oh my, this dinner is just going all wrong!" She wailed, looking as if she were about to burst in tears at any minute. Mr. Haiku soothingly rubbed her back, meanwhile sending pointed glowers to all of his children.

"So, uh…Axel." Sora began, awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck where Riku was touching it just a second ago. Axel raised an eyebrow. Friends with benefits? Really? Even though he had just dated Roxas? Hmm.

"Yep?"

"You aren't really a prostitute, right?" He wanted to know, looking completely innocent despite Riku's snickering. At Axel's dumbfounded expression, he added, "I mean, you have Roxas to give you sex!"

**6:30 P.M.**

This wasn't going to work, and really, Roxas was surprised he ever thought it would. Of course his family didn't like Axel. Other than Riku, when did his family like anyone he brought home? He just thought…that this time...

Each time his siblings and parents disliked the man he brought home, it was for a just cause, like Seifer not being liked because he was an asshole…stuff like that. And he always kind of thought if his family didn't like the guy, the guy wasn't right for him.

Roxas sighed. Guess Axel wasn't the right guy for him either.

Suddenly his door opened slightly, and Namine's cautious blue eyes blinked widely at him. "Uh, Roxas? It's me, Namine."

Yeah, because he couldn't see that for himself. "Yeah, I know. Come in."

At his calmed tone, she perked up slightly and slid inside his moderately sized room, being sure to close and lock the door behind her. Privacy was always their strong suit.

"Roxas, I have to ask you something."

"What?"

"Are you and Axel engaged?"

**7:00 P.M.**

"Well, thanks for a great meal, Hannah!" Axel complimented Mrs. Haiku cheerfully, standing up and stretching obnoxiously. "I really appreciate all the time you took cooking-"

"You didn't answer the question!" Rikku whined, practically lying across the table in order to grab Axel's hand and prevent him from walking off. "Do you and Roxas use a condom every time?!"

"Rikku, that's enough!" Mrs. Haiku practically croaked with a hoarse voice from scolding all of her children repeatedly for the last thirty minutes to stop their private and sexual questions. It didn't work. All it succeeded in doing was making her lose her voice and temper. Axel felt kind of bad for her. It wasn't her fault that she had a bunch of bad-ass kids.

"No, no, let him answer the question." Mr. Haiku amended, ignoring his wife, who finally just silently walked away. "Well Axel?"

Axel would've punched him if it wasn't for him being his lover's father. This was ridiculous! All he wanted to do now was go home, start the Jacuzzi, put some rose petals in it, and ravish Roxas like he'd never been ravished before!

"_Oh Axel!" Roxas would cry, mewling in pleasure as Axel's fingers danced against his hardness. He would arch his back and beg him to stop while he could still control it. And Axel, loving the power to pleasure his lover even more than pleasuring himself would whisper, _

_"Lose control, baby. Lose control." _

"Ohmigod, ew! What were you just daydreaming about?!" Sora shrieked, suddenly next to him as he pointed down at Axel's new bulge. Oh crap! Did he really just fantasize about Roxas in front his parents and siblings? Oh man, he must be really horny!

"Gross, man. You've got to control that sort of thing." Riku chided before dragging Sora out the room, teasingly mumbling to him, "there, there, did that dirty pervert scare you?" Axel growled. He was asking for an ass kicking.

"Man, are you lucky my parents aren't in the room!" Rikku giggled, cocking a hip at him and resting against his back. "Oh, and also, don't take tonight's dinner personally. Everyone really does like you, you know."

As soon as the words came out of her mouth, Sephiroth passed by with Cloud in tow, the latter shooting Axel's bulge a murderous glare before shaking his head and storming out the room. The redhead glanced back at Rikku dubiously.

She shuffled her feet awkwardly. "Except him."

"Thought so."

And with that, Axel exited the room in three long strides, ignoring the three giggling girls following him and trying to get a better look at his butt. Leon, who was still sitting at the table with Seifer and Demyx, blinked.

"Uh…are they coming back?"

Demyx absently touched Axel's used napkin. "Doesn't look like it."

"Then who's going to do the dishes?" Seifer demanded, scowling down at the piles of plates littering the long table. Demyx took one look at the mess before shooting out of his chair and making a beeline for the stairs, ignoring Seifer's protests and Leon's shocked glare.

"Dammit!"

**7:10 P.M.**

Roxas watched Namine walk out of his room with an indifferent expression on his face. Okay, true, Namine knew his secret now, but what did it matter in the long run? His little sister could keep a secret and she was going to find out anyway.

He sighed and plopped down dramatically on his bed. This was crazy. All of this shit just to marry an idiot like Axel…what was the world coming to?!Yet….Axel _could_ be kind of adorable when he wanted to confide in him about something…or when he was jealous but didn't want to admit it. And he treated Roxas like a princess- err, prince. Seriously, Axel spoiled him to no end.

Exhibit A:

_Monday_

Roxas (fishing in his wallet): Damn, I don't have enough money to buy the book I wanted.

Axel (with a big, stupid, cheesy grin): Oh? I'll go buy it for you.

Roxas (annoyed): No. I'll buy it later, okay-- (Axel already to the counter with the book) AXEL!

_Tuesday_

Axel (sheepish): I got you flowers.

Roxas (shocked): Why?

Axel (with a big, stupid, cheesy grin): I saw them in the store and thought about you. I bought a flower for each day we've been together.

Roxas (beet red): U-Um…

_Wednesday_

Axel (with a big, stupid, cheesy grin): I bought the latest Demyx CD you were waiting for.

_Thursday _

Axel (with a big, stupid, cheesy grin): Hey! I know you're cramming for your finals, but I went out and brought you takeout from that 5-star restaurant you like so much.

_Friday_

Axel (with a big, stupid, cheesy grin): I-

And the list went on and on, with Axel buying him everything under the sun. And Roxas just let him. At this point, he was completely defenseless against it, what with Axel giving him that big, stupid, cheesy grin every time. Anything he wanted, he got, just like that.

Roxas suddenly scowled. Except sex. The one thing he actually _asks_ for, he can't have!

His room door slowly opened, and Axel, speak of the devil, peeked his head within the crack. And what do you know, he grinned that big, stupid, cheesy-

"Hey Roxy baby, I brought you something." He sang, entering inside the room fully when he had deemed the blonde's mood to be average. Roxas was not the most pleasant person to be around when he was upset. Something always ended up broken. And it was usually an innocent bystander's body part.

Roxas scowled at him. "Unless it's your virginity, I don't want it."

Axel laughed. Him? A virgin? Don't make him laugh. He trotted over to the bed and sat down next to his fiancé, reaching in his pocket and slowly pulling out a crumbled napkin, one that had him grimacing.

"EW…I mean, you shouldn't have. No really, Axel. _You shouldn't have_." Roxas stressed, and Axel gave him a look. If he didn't stop making fun of him, he wasn't going to get the damn gift at all.

He gently opened up the napkin, revealing the treasure that lay inside. "This was a gift I bought for you while I was away."

Roxas' mouth fell open and his hands trembled as he reached for the beautiful pure silver ring with real black and white diamonds encrusting its entire circular surface. "You _bought_ this? For me?"

Axel rolled his eyes as he slid the ring on Roxas' finger. "Of course it's for you. Who else would it be for?"

He smirked when the blonde fell silent, looking as if he were choking back some strong emotions. Aw…how adorable. Roxas was too perfect for words…he was strong, cute, loyal-

Axel suddenly darkened. Wait a minute.

"You know," He began flatly, ignoring the cute, confused little frown Roxas gave him at the change of voice, "I was going to give that to you last month, on Halloween."

Roxas, who noticed the mood swing but was too high to really divulge too deep into it, distractedly murmured, "Eh? Why didn't you?"

"If I recall, all of your attention was on the Halloween Party and you couldn't concentrate enough to open the door for the UPS man. He had to send it back. Maybe that was when you were in the closet, making out with Riku the Cake Boy for fifteen minutes…" He lamented, raising an eyebrow when Roxas practically dropped the ring in startled panic.

He winced unconvincingly at the red head. "Would you believe me if I told you it's not as serious as it seems?"

Axel narrowed his eyes ominously. He wasn't getting out of this that easily. "Eh, it depends on your testimony."

"Okay, look," Roxas started, taking a deep breath. "Let me begin by saying that none of this was my idea at all. We were at the Halloween Party, the one that I had poured my blood and tears into, mind you, and suddenly Kairi, Sora's best friend who is just as hyper and gullible as he is, only not as dense, goes, 'let's play Seven Minutes in Heaven, just for old time's sake!' because we've had a Halloween Party every year since kindergarten and we used to always play that. I tried telling them that I couldn't, but they looked so hurt and refused to play if I didn't play!"

He peered up at Axel, blinking his beautiful blue eyes. "Tragic, isn't it?"

Axel smirked at him. He knew this trick. "That's not going to work, Roxy. Keep explaining."

Roxas sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "So everyone's playing, and I'm just sitting there, content on not being chosen, and what do you know, the bottle lands on me. Oh wow, it's Riku who spun it! Who'd have thought? Well, I'm a good sport, so I go inside the closet with him, but I'm an even better boyfriend, so I fully intended to let him know that this wasn't going to happen."

When Roxas stopped talking, Axel paused, blinking at the long, awkward silence that followed. He raised an eyebrow. "Is that it?"

The blonde nodded. "Yes."

"But…you just said you fully intended to let him know that it wasn't going to happen."

"Yes."

"But it _did_ happen."

"Yes."

Axel smacked his forehead. This was more trouble than it was worth. For the sake of their impending engagement and his inability to stay mad at Roxas for more than an hour, he was just going to let this go.

"Alright. Fine. As long as the kissing meant nothing, and as long as it'll never happen again." He exhaled, pulling him to his chest and wrapping his arms around him. The blonde laughed and toyed with the ring on his finger.

"I assure you, it meant nothing. Ha…as if. Riku is such a…he's so…well, let's just say he isn't you." Roxas finally decided, finding it hard to find any flaws in his ex. That was just one tidbit he didn't need the red head knowing. He suddenly smiled. Now that they had resolved that…and they were holding each other, sex would be so easy to obtain!

Suddenly the door slammed open, causing Axel to spring away from him as if he had been burned. Roxas glared at him before directing his scorn at the person who had interrupted his snuggling. He was about to get laid, dammit!

"Hey Rox, Mom said that it's time for you to tell Axel to get his 'damn tentacles off of your innocent body' and come to my room until we go to sleep." Sora recounted cheerfully, grinning madly while he relayed his message. Axel tilted his head at him. How could _one_ person be _so_ joyous?

Roxas widened his eyes in shock. "Mom did _not_ say that!"

"No duh, Sherlock." Sora laughed while Roxas gave him an exhausted, annoyed scowl. "Dad told me to tell you that Mom said of all that, because he doesn't want Axel to know how much he secretly hates him."

Axel's whole body slumped dejectedly. Was he _that_ bad? He took comfort in the small pat Roxas gave him on the head.

"Anyway. Let's go. Riku just went home, and I'm bored. You need to come entertain me." Sora demanded seriously, cocking his hip against the doorframe and looking at the two lovers expectantly.

"Do you see what I have to deal with?" Roxas whispered to Axel with a sigh, giggling when the red head nestled his neck to half-heartedly stop him from leaving.

Sora huffed exagerratedly. "My boredom isn't going to cure itself, you know."

Roxas rolled his eyes, reluctantly pulling away from him and standing up with a yawn. "Well, I guess I am kind of tired."

Axel watched the two leave Roxas' room with a determined sigh. Well, the day was almost over. If he could last one day, than he could easily last them all. He wasn't sure how long Roxas expected them to stay here, but it didn't matter, because he was in it for the long haul.

Because it was a fact. Roxas Haiku was his selfish, possessive, unappreciative, teasing, playful, adorable soul mate. And Axel would do _anything_ to make him belong to him, so that no outside force could break through their emotional bond.

"Yo, Giraffe, the name is Zack. And I'm here…to sleep with you. Now, get on your back and spread your legs."

Yes, Axel would do anything for Roxas.

Just not that.

* * *

**So, we have a lot of characters introduced, huh? And trust me, we aren't done! There's one more thrilling installment in the Meet the Family series, and trust me, it is the funniest, most exciting, romantic chapter yet! You don't want to miss it! And it's coming to you real soon! Not in a year, though, I promise! :D**


	3. Meet the Family

**This chapter...this last, final end of an era...has haunted me for the past year. Yes. This ENTIRE year you've been patiently waiting, I've been writing and rewriting this monster. Whew! But I finished it just in time for Akuroku Day! Axel hearts Roxas! **

**Reviewers...I love you so much! Special thanks to: **Following Padfoot's Pawprints, foxyaoi123, ninjafox369, Ldrmas, ScreamforSOH, Riana1702, blood as soft as silk, Obsidian Thunder, **and **Novelist Pup**. Thanks for taking the time to review! It means so much to me.**

**And thank you to everyone who has supported me ****and this three-shot! **

**

* * *

**

**Then**

* * *

Axel stared up at muscled, dark, looming shadow standing in the doorway. Uh, what? Did this mental case have the wrong room? Well, he did call him a giraffe, a nickname he became very familiar with all through elementary school…and there really weren't any other tall, sexy redheads in the house…

Obviously this guy meant him. Which was funny, because Axel could've sworn this psycho told him to lie on his back and spread his legs. Like a whore. Like a wanton, _uke_ whore.

And let it be known that Axel was no one's whore. He had dignity. Class. Virginity.

Eh…maybe that was going a little too far. But the truth was, he was neither an uke nor a whore, henceforth, this stranger in his room was just that: a _stranger_ in his room, and a horny, aggressive one at that.

"You're a stranger." Axel announced, proud that he had the brainpower to make that deduction all on his own, no matter how stupid he probably sounded. The stranger rolled his eyes and, in answer, slowly closed Roxas' bedroom door. Axel's face fell. What was with this dude? Didn't he understand the laws of uncommon strangers?

"Look," He began as the shadow took a couple of menacing steps toward the bed that Axel was lounging on, "don't you know anything? Now, I don't know you, and you don't know me, which means, as strangers, it's our job, nay, our _necessity_, to introduce ourselves and get to know each other a little bit."

The stranger paused quizzically. "I just told you my name was Zack."

Axel nodded encouragingly. This was a step! "Good! Hi Zack, I'm Axel. Now, let's start by telling facts about each other. I'll go first: I don't want to be raped."

Zack, finally stepping into the light which was pouring in by the open window, gave him a stupid look. Axel, surprised at how good looking his attacker was, returned it tenfold. He wasn't about to be intimidated by some stranger in his, err, Roxas', bedroom.

Finally, Zack sighed and asked sharply, "Do you honestly think I'm here to rape you?"

Telling some guy you've never met to 'lie on your back and spread your legs' was kind of something a creepy sexual predator would tell you to do. But for the sake of the conversation, Axel refrained from pointing this out. He sighed. Knowing his luck, Cloud probably sent Zack in here.

"Cloud sent me in here, actually." Zack admitted, and Axel flopped down dejectedly against Roxas' fluffy checkered pillows. Damn it! Damn older brothers and their damn protective urges!

"Let me guess, he thought I couldn't be trusted to stay in my own bed." Axel muttered, and Zack seemed to laugh, amazed at Axel's correct guess. He rolled his eyes. This was so ridiculous.

"Yep; Cloud always invites me here when he meets one of the siblings' romantic interests. And being best friends with both him and Sephiroth, I kind of have to help." Zack explained with a shrug, sitting next to his lanky frame on the bed. "But what would make you think he would ask me to rape you?"

"I didn't think Cloud asked you to. I thought you were just going to do it on your own."

"Yeah, because I would _want_ to have sex with a giraffe that is taller _and_ lankier than me; that may be Roxas' MO, but it sure as hell isn't _my_ fantasy."

Axel glared at him. Jeez, tone down the sarcasm. _He_ wasn't the weirdo who barged in the room and made suggestive comments, now was he? Besides, if he wasn't here to take him, what the hell was he here for?

"So…you're still here." Axel finally pointed out, nudging him sharply with his toes, half-heartedly trying to push him off the bed. Why wouldn't he get off and go?

"I told you," Zack said, sounding a little annoyed now, "Cloud sent me here."

"Yeah…?" He drawled, growling in irritation when Zack still didn't move. "You can go now."

Zack also growled, seeming to finger the sword attached to his person as if he were fighting the urge to whip it out. Axel wouldn't be surprised if he did. "Dude, what about this don't you understand? I have to sleep in here with you to make sure you don't sneak in some midnight munchies while the rest of us are unsuspecting."

Axel frowned. "And lying down and spreading my legs?"

Zack shrugged and pulled out two long pieces of rope. "To tie you down. We're all men here. I think we all know what happens to a man late at night when his hormones are raging."

Axel finally just flopped back down. Exhaustion was turning him into a quitter before their very eyes. He flung out his legs dramatically and groaned, "Do your worst! But be gentle…I'm shy."

**10:00 A.M.**

Axel woke up the next morning with a sore back and even sorer pride. That infuriating Cloud was right: his hormones were raging, and he _had_ tried to sneak out last night. But not to have do _that_! Didn't he already say he was trying to be respectable?

He just wanted to cuddle.

He sat up, noting that his ropes had been cut and Zack was nowhere in the room. Guess he figured Axel would be too tired to do much of anything when he woke up. Axel scowled. He was right.

Well whatever! He was grumpy and tired, and now he just wanted a nice, piping hot shower. Was that too much to ask?

Slowly rising to his feet—jeez, he felt like someone had just taken his anal virginity—Axel, shuffled to the door and opened it, poking his head and ruffled mane through the crack. Silence.

He grinned and stuck out a long leg. Maybe he would get his shower after all.

Suddenly, all the doors around him banged open, and six heads poked from their rooms, all looking adorably rustled and sleepy.

Then, from the master bedroom, a voice boomed out from the shut entrance.

"Let the bidding begin!"

Those were the magic words.

"I got bathroom first!" Demyx shouted, ignoring the anxious groans of the other siblings. "Oh, shut up, will ya? We have guests, for crying out loud!"

"First bathroom trip goes to Demyx. Next bidder!" The voice announced, and next it was Rikku to pipe up.

"Me second! YPR gets second!" She cried, and the boys of the house all snorted simultaneously. Rikku suddenly looked annoyed. "What the hell is everyone's problem?"

"Why can't you guys ever take individual showers?" Roxas demanded, and Axel brightened at hearing Roxas' morning voice. It was hoarse and so very, very sexy. He tried to catch his eye, but the blonde was too busy wrestling with Sora for space in the doorway.

"I know, right? What do you guys even do in there?" Demyx added, glancing curiously at them. The door to Rikku's room suddenly shut, and all that could be heard from the three were giggles. Axel shuddered. He hated the thought of some kind of orgy going on in there.

What? Just because he was a guy didn't mean he wanted to see that. Think of the unsanitary mess that would be in that bathroom!

The voice boomed once more to grab their disturbed attention. "The order thus far is Demyx, then Rikku! Next bidder!"

"I'm next!" Both Roxas and Sora cried at the same time. Then they both glared at each other. Axel smirked. They were twins, through and through.

"Why are you always trying to get things before me?" Sora whined, and Roxas scoffed back in agitation.

"Oh please, you're the one who is always copying me and following me around. It only makes sense for me to go first."

"No way, man! You're just being a jerk!"

"So?"

"What do you mean, so? So, that's mean! That's my so!"

"Is that so?"

"So!"

"So," the voice began uncertainly from behind the door. "The bathroom goes to Roxas, with Sora trailing after!"

"What?" Sora exclaimed angrily, and Roxas chuckled in victory. "That isn't fair!"

"Neither is life, kid." Axel called out to him, unable to avoid rubbing it in. That managed to get Roxas' attention. He laughed, ignoring his twin who turned with a huff back into the room.

"Good morning!" He shouted to him from down the hall with a good-natured laugh. Axel returned it, mouthing back the words instead, and adding the word fiancé to the end of it. He couldn't contain a goofy grin at Roxas' flush.

Roxas softly closed the door behind him and quietly tiptoed down the hall and into Axel's awaiting arms. He pulled the blonde inside and shut the door behind him.

When he turned to face Roxas, he saw that he was giggling like a madman. "We're going to get in so much trouble if Cloud or my dad catches us." He exclaimed.

"You don't seem too worried." Axel chuckled, covering his own mouth with his hand. He didn't want his morning breath to ruin what would otherwise be a sweet, quick reunion.

"I'm not. I feel so dangerous!" Roxas snickered, falling back onto the bed Axel was sleeping on. He suddenly sat up, pulling a rope from underneath his body. He dangled it suspiciously in front of Axel's face.

"What the hell is this?" He demanded, all traces of his giddiness gone. Axel didn't care though; he was used to this. Giddiness was Roxas' morning personality. But it was like a mirage…it wasn't real.

"Why don't you ask your older brother?" Axel snorted, pulling Roxas off the bed and wrapping his arms around his back.

Roxas squirmed and tried to pull away. Obviously the subject wasn't over. "How about I don't? I'm asking _you_."

Axel rolled his eyes. No need for the attitude. "Fine, Mr. Grumpy, if you must know, Cloud sent in that overreacting friend of his, Zack, who insisted on tying me up so I wouldn't sneak into your room."

"Why would he do that?" Roxas groaned in exasperation, throwing the rope off of the bed and plopping back down. "I mean, what did he think we were going to do?"

Axel coughed. Jeez, sometimes Roxas was too innocent for his own good. "You know…he thought we were going to…woohoo."

"Woohoo?"

"Yep."

"With Sora lying next to me?"

"Yes, okay, jeez, let's move on!" Axel said, pulling Roxas' body to his. "Now…how about a morning kiss?"

Roxas made a face. "Ew! What about our morning breath?"

Axel smiled devilishly. "I think we'll manage. Besides, if you say no, I'll just tie you up."

"I guess I'm going to have to get used to this." Roxas sighed playfully, pulling his lips down to his. But as soon as they touched, the door banged open, revealing Demyx clad in nothing but a towel, while water dripped down his abs. Axel immediately looked away. He did _not_ need to be ogling a superstar; especially one that wanted him.

"Hey Roxas, better get back to your room. Dad will be doing his morning rounds to make sure there was no woohoo-ing going on last night." Demyx warned him, but his eyes were on Axel the entire time. "Axel, you look sexy in the morning."

Axel coughed and held Roxas back as he tried to tackle his flirtatious older brother. "Yeah, thanks Demyx."

"See you at breakfast." He grinned at him toothily before walking back out of the room, purposely leaving the door open. Roxas cleared his throat and glared at Axel as if it was his fault.

"What?" Axel exclaimed, shrugging helplessly. What was he supposed to do?

"Nothing. See you at breakfast." Roxas muttered, still looking irritated. Before exiting the room, however, he turned to him with a smile.

"You do look sexy in the morning." He admitted grudgingly.

Axel smirked and stretched sensually. "Damn straight."

**11:05 A.M.**

Cheaper by the Dozen. That was the closest Axel could come to describing what breakfast was like for the Haikus. Toast, bacon, eggs, pancakes, grits, oatmeal, fruit, waffles…food was everywhere!

Not that he was complaining. Protecting his body from muscled men always made him hungry.

"So! What are your plans for today, Axel?" Hannah Haiku asked curiously, looking fresh faced and lovely. He smiled at her. For someone to have crazy children, she really was a nice person.

"Nothing so far." Axel shrugged, glancing at Roxas. He would do whatever he wanted him to do. As long as it didn't involve sex. It was getting harder and harder (literally!) to deny that adorable little blonde.

Roxas gave him a knowing grin. "He's free to do whatever he wants during the day. But tonight…he's busy."

Axel shook his head determinedly, giving him a pointed frown. "No, I'm pretty sure I'm not."

"I'm pretty sure you are." Roxas retorted sharply, running his hand down his thigh. Axel jumped in his seat. Jeez, Roxas! It was a good thing they were sitting right next to each other; otherwise the whole table would see him trying to jack him off!

"Actually, Roxas, I got a phone call from Pence, Hayner and Olette. They happen to be in town! They even said they planned to kidnap you and have a sleepover, just like old times! Isn't that great?" Demyx informed him conversationally with an obviously fake look on his face. Everyone watched Roxas carefully for any sort of reaction.

"Besides," He continued, spearing a strawberry with his fork, "I already told Axel I was going to show him something tonight."

Roxas growled, his patience clearly wearing thin. "I'll show _you_ something mighty painful—"

"Anyway!" Sam Elliot Haiku interjected gruffly, turning the page of his newspaper and taking a loud sip of his coffee. "Axel, I thought maybe you wouldn't mind heading down to the island with me and the rest of the boys today. Take a little swim."

Axel gulped. Well, the truth was…

"Dad," Roxas snickered, and this time Axel could see if coming before he even finished his sentence. "Axel can't swim."

"Your boyfriend can't swim?" Cloud asked Roxas loudly, entering the room with Sephiroth and Zack trailing behind him. "How do you two even get along?"

Roxas smiled. "I tried teaching him. It didn't work, though."

Axel grumbled. Of course it didn't work. He liked fire, got that? Water only put out his fire…there was no use for it.

"Don't worry Roxas," Zach grinned, grabbing a plate as if he lived there, "After last night, I understand what you see in him."

Axel choked. Nice compliment, but way to sound suggestive. Did he want for Roxas to dump him?

Then he realized that, yeah, he kind of did. He worked with Hades, A.K.A., Cloud.

Roxas scowled at his food. He was getting tired of everyone's romantic interest in _his_ man. How many times was he going to have to prove to them that they were freaking soul mates?

"That's okay. He can spar with me and Roxas, instead." Sora offered up helpfully, and Roxas tossed him a grateful smile. At least somebody was making an effort.

"Sparring?" Axel repeated with a snort. "Piece of freaking cake."

**12:01 P.M.**

No. Sparring with Roxas and Sora was not a piece of freaking cake. It was definitely a piece of whoop ass. And no one liked the taste of whoop ass.

"Winner is: Sora!" Elliot announced, and the Haiku men all clapped in pride. Axel scowled and rubbed his jaw. Sora was way better than he had expected. Whatever. Of course he was going to lose if he had to fight with Roxas' old keyblades. They were too heavy for him!

Personally, he liked chakrams the best, but none of the Haikus owned any! All they had stockpiled were weird assortments of keyblades, shields, and swords.

Roxas walked over to where Axel was still sprawled out on the ground and smiled. "Losing isn't very attractive on a guy, you know."

Axel glared up at his fiancé. What did he see in Roxas again? "Neither is selling out your fiancé." Roxas just laughed and helped him up.

"Sorry. But it was for your own good. Wouldn't you rather be getting your ass kicked by Sora than drowning in salty water?" Roxas asked him with a raised eyebrow and Axel couldn't help but agree. Drowning was so not cool these days.

"Alright, how about this?" Axel challenged, sitting up and tossing him a smirk. "You fight me."

Roxas snorted. "Yeah, right."

Now Axel was starting to get a little offended. Just because he lost to Sora didn't mean he wasn't a completely capable fighter! This was part of his profession! "Why the hell not?"

"Cause I'd win, dumbass." Roxas replied, still laughing. He pointed down to his jaw, which was now turning a little red. "Look what _Sora_ did to you, the guy who said you had his fuckable stamp of approval. Just imagine what kind of injuries _I_ would give you."

Axel didn't care. This was about pride, dammit. "Don't be a punk."

"Don't be ridiculous." Roxas retorted, folding his arms. "I'm trying to be nice and keep you from embarrassing yourself even more in front of my family."

"You're just scared you'll lose." Axel jibed lowly, standing up and striding over to the weapons bin. He dug through it with raw determination. There had to be some chakrams in there somewhere.

"If you're going to be a dick about this, then fine. Get your ass kicked. See what I care." Roxas scoffed, grabbing two keyblades from the stack. For a moment, Axel felt apprehensive. Unlike Sora, Roxas wielded _two_ keyblades. As if one wasn't painful enough.

But when his hands found two sharp chakrams, his confidence came back to him. Ah, good old chakrams!

"Holy Zeus, what is he doing?" Sora murmured, shaking his head. "He's going to lose! Roxas has only ever lost to me! And that was one time!"

Riku grinned, but said nothing. He didn't want him to know that _he_ in fact had managed to beat Roxas once as well. Things were kind of tense with Sora, lately. It was almost as if he had formed it in his head that he still had a thing for Roxas.

But it was whatever. He was used to the Haikus jumping to crazy conclusions.

"At least your dad isn't here to see him lose." Riku pointed out, glancing out to the water where Sephiroth, Zack, Cloud and Sam Elliot Haiku were now swimming competitively. He smirked. He could still remember when he first met the Haikus. Cloud hated him almost as much as he hated Axel.

"Fuck, Roxas!" Both of them suddenly heard Axel shout, and they looked over just in time to see Axel holding his left arm while blood seeped from under his hand. Roxas looked more horrified than either of them had ever seen him.

"I'm so sorry, Axel!" Roxas exclaimed distraughtly, ripping off his shirt and running over to Axel. Sora watched as he gently tied it against Axel's arm, but not before giving it a soft 'I'm sorry' kiss. He had never seen Roxas so…gentle.

"Do you think I'll ever be like that? You know, with someone I love?" Sora asked Riku slowly, giving him a meaningful look. Riku, unfortunately, didn't seem to notice his pick-up attempt.

"Maybe. Hey, we better head back to the house to finish the cake. We still have to frost, remember?" Riku reminded him. Before Sora could even reply, he had already taken off for the house. Sora ran after, a frown plastered on his face.

Damn Riku. He wasn't making this easy!

**1:50 P.M.**

Axel couldn't believe he lost. To Roxas, of all people.

Well, okay, he could believe it.

What he really couldn't believe was that Roxas accidently slashed his arm. 'I tripped!' He had insisted, looking like he had just killed his own puppy. Axel couldn't help but forgive him despite the fact that there was literally nothing around for him to trip on. But he was still a little pissy about it.

Actually, he was a little pissy about this entire trip. The more he thought about what Roxas had done, the more annoyed he got. Technically, Roxas tricked him into coming here. And now that he was here, things kinda sucked.

"Honestly, Axel." Roxas complained, finally finished bandaging his arm properly. "Are you going to be this grumpy all day?"

Axel sniffed indignantly. "I don't like your tone."

"I don't like your attitude." Roxas retorted snappily. Then he sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Sorry. I'm not in the best mood either."

Axel frowned at him. What did he have to be grumpy about? He wasn't the one who got his arm slashed. "Why?"

"I'm not getting any." Roxas answered loudly and bluntly, and Axel had to jump up and shut the bathroom door so Hannah Haiku didn't overhear them. Jeez, was Roxas trying to get him in trouble with his folks?

"You know, you should like me for more than my body, Roxy." Axel sighed, but Roxas only glared at him in a way that let him know he was definitely not amused and definitely not kidding.

The door suddenly received a loud knock, followed by Rikku's voice. "Hey Roxas! Can we borrow Axel for a couple of hours?"

Axel turned to his secret fiancé, giving him the best puppy dog look he could think of.

But, obviously, it didn't work on the guy who had long since mastered the look.

Ignoring his pleading expression, Roxas gave Axel a grin that was filled with revenge. "Borrow him for as long as you like!"

Axel scowled. All of this because he wouldn't have sex with him?

"Be that way, then." He sniffed, standing up and walking out of the bathroom. He could hear Roxas snickering behind him, and before Axel could register what was happening, he received a hearty squeeze on his right butt check.

His heart banged against his rib cage as an intense arc of pleasure danced down his spine. Holding in the moan that had almost slipped from his mouth, he wagged his finger at Roxas in a scolding manner before he practically ran out of the bathroom as fast as he could.

"Oh, and Axel? Meet me in the laundry room in three hours." Roxas called after him, still grinning like the cat that caught the mouse. "Have fun!"

**2:00 P.M.**

Axel was not having fun. Not in the least.

What Rikku meant by 'borrowing him' was actually 'borrowing his driving'. Which was just another way of saying, 'drive us wherever we want to go, bitch.'

Now, he felt their pain. During his young adulthood, his older siblings refused to drive him around, just like Rikku's older siblings were. But he never asked his big bro's boyfriends to sub in instead. Hell, he didn't know _anyone_ who did that.

"I'm only doing this for Roxas, you know." Axel felt compelled to explain, scowling when a car full of teenagers pulled out quickly in front of him, causing him to slam on his brakes. Damn kids!

"It's so weird," Rikku began with a little shake of her head, "that Roxas has such a boring boyfriend."

Axel was so offended that he stopped the car then and there, right in the middle of the street. "Get out."

Yuna and Paine gasped and quickly turned to Rikku for guidance. But the blonde simply scoffed and folded her arms. "So you're saying I'm wrong?"

"Rikku, Rikku, Rikku." Axel sighed, shaking his head and smirking at her. "Who do you think you're talking to? I invented fun."

"Lies!" Rikku cried, and Axel's mood depleted to a startling ten percent. This girl did _not_ know who she was messing with.

"Believe it or not, your brother is the one with the stick up his ass most of the time."

"What? No way."

Axel cleared his throat and began to mimic his fiancé. _"No, Axel, we can't do that! Axel, we're going to get in trouble! Axel, playing with fire is dangerous!"_

The girls all laughed. "Playing with fire _is_ dangerous."

"Not if you know how to wield it, Rikku." He scoffed. Looking at the three mischievous girls, he was suddenly reminded of himself. It was pretty much the same spirit and carefree nature that he had when he was their age. Of course, _his_ siblings were like demons; complete jerks who never played with him…but whatever. Close enough.

"You know what?" Axel suddenly declared, turning to look at the three troublemakers. "Let me show you what _real_ fun looks like."

**5:00 P.M.**

"You're _where_?" Roxas demanded murderously, pacing back and forth in the garage, the place where Axel had avidly convinced him to go to. Because, he insisted, he might get a little testy and want to curse very, very loudly when he found out where they were. Which, of course…was jail.

Roxas shook his head. He never should have left Rikku and Axel alone together. Rikku was a little match that would clearly light Axel, the fire.

"God dammit, Axel. Dad is going to _freak the fuck out_ when he finds out you got Rikku arrested." He groaned, slapping his palm to his forehead. "And no, I don't have enough fucking money to post your bail."

Axel fell silent on the other line, but Roxas did not feel the least bit of pity. This happened way too many times before. Every single time he got even close to saving a large amount of money, Axel got himself arrested. And now he had dragged Rikku into it.

"Let me talk to Rikku." Roxas sighed, waiting for Axel to pass his little sister the phone. "Hello?"

"Ohmigawd, Roxas!" Rikku squealed, and he immediately winced. "Axel is so fucking cool!"

Roxas rolled his eyes. Well of course Axel was cool. That was part of why he loved him. But that didn't mean Rikku needed to act like that. "Watch your mouth."

"Why? Axel curses all of the time!" Rikku whined. He let his head fall back in shame. What was he thinking, bringing Axel around his baby sister? She was impressionable!

"Okay, Rikku, listen. What's the charge? Why are you guys in jail?" He asked hesitantly. Did he really even want to know?

Besides that…now it looked like he was going to have to get help from the one person no one wanted to be indebted to…

**5:15 P.M.**

Sephiroth stepped out of the bathroom blissfully, mentally acknowledging that the house was, for once, completely silent. Well, Sora and Riku weren't, due to the fact that they were in the kitchen placing the finishing touches on their thank you cake—something that was taking them _hours_ to do for some reason. But those imbeciles didn't really count.

He had deliberately chosen to remain only towel-clad, considering what he was planning to do to Cloud once he made it back to the room. But one quick glance to his left revealed Roxas coming back into the house from the garage, looking both distressed and pissed at the same time.

Normally, Sephiroth would ignore this. It was certainly _not_ his problem. Lately, however, Cloud's little brats had taken to coming to him for assistance with their issues. It was so very, very irritating, and so very, very bad for his sanity.

This was why he just knew Roxas was heading his way.

So, sighing heavily, Sephiroth stepped back into the bathroom to grab his jet black robe.

"Oh, Sephiroth!" Roxas called out, spotting him instantly in the black robe. "Can I talk to you for a moment?"

And that was how Sephiroth found himself at the police station, artfully placing little cuts on the police officers' skin when they weren't paying attention in order to convince them to let Axel, Rikku and her minions off free of charge, free of consequence, and free of any later problems. He was terrifying enough, he knew, without the physical violence, so it wasn't really needed. But if he had to come down here in his free time, he was going to get some practice out of it.

"Yo, Sephiroth! Thanks for…whatever you just did." Axel thanked him, smirking in a way that told Sephiroth that he was definitely _not_ sorry.

"Axel," Roxas groaned, holding his hand as if he were a toddler that needed constant watching. "Was it really worth it? I mean, really?"

"Rikku. Why don't you answer that?"

Rikku beamed at Axel before giving Roxas a nonchalant shrug. "Burning people then hiding and making it look like it was an inanimate object that did it so they'll freak out is always worth it."

Sephiroth seethed on the inside. What was he becoming? In his single days, he never would have rescued a couple of brats for doing ridiculous public actions. Damn Cloud; making him fall in love.

"So, Seph, you're not going to tell Cloud, right?" Rikku worried suddenly, her optimism dying down with the threat of her overprotective big brother looming over her. "Please?"

Sephiroth rolled his eyes. And be the one who received the brunt of Cloud's irrational fretting? "No."

"Thanks Sephiroth. You know, now I kind of get why Cloud loves you so much." Roxas mulled, giving him a sincere smile. Sephiroth merely grimaced at him and turned away. He didn't need his compliments.

But if someone happened to look for one brief moment, they would have seen the corner of Sephiroth's mouth actually go up.

**5: 18 P.M.**

Cloud chuckled devilishly as he stood outside of Demyx's room, waiting for his younger brother to finish talking to his friend Xigbar on the phone. What were they talking about for so long anyway?

Whatever. It didn't matter. What mattered was that he was going to assist him in getting rid of Axel. Sephiroth had already done his part; he stealthily researched Roxas' past occupations to see which of them would cause a rift between the two.

Roxas had never told them where he worked, but Cloud always suspected that he used to be a stripper or a prostitute or something equally scandalous. It was in the way Roxas talked about it; he was always so defensive.

Once Sephiroth had indeed uncovered the scandalous job Roxas once held, Cloud knew all he needed to do was tell Demyx and plant the seed.

"Okay…okay, yes….alright already! I already told you I was going to seduce him tonight! Yes! Oh…fine. Bye!" Demyx huffed, finally managing to get off of the phone just as he exited his room. When he saw Cloud, he squealed loudly and jumped ten feet back.

"Cloud!" He breathed, cowering ever so slightly. "What are you doing?"

Cloud secured his arm around Demyx's shoulders, giving him a brotherly squeeze. "Demyx, I've decided that I like you."

Demyx looked at him like he was crazy. "_Why_?"

"I dunno." Cloud shrugged, dismissing the statement just as soon as he made it. "Anyway, because of this newfound respect for you, I've decided that I'm going to help you get Axel."

Now Demyx's face made him look like a mad scientist. "Woah, you're starting to freak me out, dude. If you need money or something, Cloud, just ask, man. I don't mind—"

"I don't want your money, Demyx. Some of us don't need to be rock stars to earn incomes, okay?" Cloud smirked, shaking his head. Money was the last thing he and Seph needed, thanks to their high-paying jobs. Stupid, naive Demyx. Sometimes he wondered how they were even related.

"So you're really just being nice?" Demyx questioned him suspiciously, still looking wary.

Cloud grinned even wider. "Cross my heart!"

Demyx suddenly relaxed in his arms, molding into Cloud's brotherly embrace as easily as silly putty. "Okay, great! Well, what did you have in mind?"

"I heard you're taking Axel clubbing tonight." Cloud began, walking Demyx down the hallway and back to his room. "I have a suggestion as to where."

**7:25 P.M.**

Axel waited silently inside the laundry room, twiddling his thumbs together with nerves he really shouldn't have felt. Roxas was his fiancé dammit! He shouldn't be scared to tell him that he just didn't want to have sex with him!

But still…Roxas was pretty sensitive. And by sensitive he meant a hothead. And by a hothead he meant a controlling, angry little blonde who always found a way to have…well, his way. Not really like a brat or anything. Just like…someone who never took no for an answer. Determined, was the word for it, he guessed.

He jumped as the laundry room door swung open, revealing Roxas holding a basket full of dirty clothes. Axel stared at him. Oooookaaay, he wasn't expecting that he actually wanted to do clothes! Oh! This changed everything!

"Here, let me get tho-"

"Sit on top of the washer machine." Roxas demanded, not even looking at him as he threw the clothes into said machine. Axel frowned. Well jeez; what the hell was _his_ problem?

Roxas already forgave him for the jail thing thanks to Sephiroth, so it wasn't like there was any reason to stay mad at him.

Still, he wasn't one to enjoy Roxas' wrath, so he did as he was told, sitting down on the washer machine just as Roxas slammed its door. He tried to catch the blonde's eyes, to figure out just what the hell was going on, but Roxas kept his head down as he reached by him, placing both arms on either side of him to turn on the machine to the right settings.

Axel raised an eyebrow. Was he okay..? He was acting weird. Like, that crazy cow Isabel weird. And that was pretty weird.

The machine started going, but Roxas didn't move, instead keeping both arms on either side of him, trapping him. Wait…trapping him…?

Axel's eyes widened. Wait a minute—

Roxas lifted up his head and fixed him with a determined, lustful stare. "We're _going_ to have sex."

Oh shit.

"Wait a sec Roxas; we're _not_ going to have sex. I don't want to." He stammered, but he wasn't ready for this kind of attack. His voice was cracking, his whole demeanor screamed _uke!_, and frankly…Roxas looked sexy as hell.

Roxas smirked as he climbed on top of him, pulling off his shirt and displaying his perfect, golden body. Axel had to bite his lip to regain his control. This was _not_ good.

For once he was trying to be a good boy, like the good son-in-laws who respected the rules and the house and shit, but Roxas hitting on him and jacking him off and looking all sexy and irresistible was just too much to bear!

"I wasn't asking you." Roxas snorted, ripping off their pants.

"Wait Roxas, I really like your mom."

Roxas bit his neck. "So?"

"So I respect her. I don't want to disrespect her by having sex in her house."

Roxas suddenly growled and stopped moving, making Axel sigh in relief, and in disappointment. Okay, so yeah, he wanted to respect the house and stuff, but his libido wasn't much better than Roxas'. Both contained large doses of testosterone. Sex between the two usually lasted about three hours minimum, neither tiring, and neither quitting.

"You picked the wrong day to start acting noble now." Roxas snapped, but he got off of him with a groan and started to put his pants back on. Axel smiled. He was only doing this because he loved him.

"I'm doing this for you, you know." Axel sang, grabbing his wrist so he could turn it over and kiss it. "You're going to respect me much more when this is over, Roxy baby."

His blonde lover merely hummed indifferently as he pulled his shirt over his head. "Sure, whatever you say."

But nevertheless, Roxas paused slightly and turned back to look at him. For a second they both just stared at each other, relearning the other the way they hadn't had a chance to since arriving. Finally, when Axel slowly smiled at him, Roxas spoke.

"You know," He began softly, "its already impossible for any living creature in this universe to love you more than I do. So don't feel like you have to impress me, okay?"

Axel grinned goofily. He loved hearing Roxas tell him that he loved him. It was the best feeling in the world. It was better than winning the lottery, better than winning American Idol, even better than sex!

Well, maybe not that…

Suddenly, the sexy beast inside of him began to stir from this proclamation, and Axel's pants, the same ones Roxas had just put back on him, were abruptly a little too tight. Was he…?

Oh no, was he horny? _Now_?

Roxas raised an eyebrow at the uncomfortable expression that had crossed his fiancé's face before his eyes wandered down to the tight bulge in his pants. He smirked.

"Someone a late bloomer?" He quipped, trying to hold back laughter. Axel scowled.

"Shut up, and come here." He ordered as he reached for him, but Roxas nimbly dodged his grasp and made a sudden movement for the door. He grinned playfully.

"I don't know Axel, I might respect you less." He sighed dramatically. "Damn, and I really wanted to…"

"Wanted to what?" He asked eagerly, unknowingly taking the bait.

"No, nothing, never mind… it's too late for that. Besides, I don't know if you would be able to be quiet enough once I start."

"Roxas, get back here. We're going to do it, _now_."

The said boy merely scoffed in amusement at the order. "No." He replied simply, and left the room. Axel frowned. He should have known that Roxas was not one to be told what to do, despite the hypocrisy that stirred from it. Ugh, screw honor and respect; he should have listened when Roxas wanted him to take him.

"Roxas!" Axel groaned, taking off after him and grabbing his arm. "Don't just walk away."

The blonde grinned at him. "What, miss me already?"

"No one likes a tease." Axel whispered playfully in his ear, giving it a little lick and watching as Roxas' cheeks reddened ever so slightly.

"I only tease you because I like you." Roxas snorted, pushing him away and hopping onto the counter. "I learned that from Riku."

Axel glowered immediately. "Don't say that name in this house."

"Have you forgotten that it's my house?" Roxas asked amusedly, raising an eyebrow. "Don't tell me you're jealous?"

"Considering you made out with him while I was gone, yeah, I guess I fucking am." Axel growled, stepping away from him and folding his arms. He was cool about Riku when Roxas told him the truth, but just thinking about it made his blood burn.

Something about the way Roxas and Riku acted around each other gave him all kinds of ideas about their relationship…

"Look at me." Roxas ordered seriously, and Axel obliged without even thinking about it. "I love you. Not Riku Nioki. I want you. Not Riku Nioki. I crave—"

"Cake!" Sora interrupted, suddenly appearing right in front of them. He turned to Axel and grinned cheekily. "I made you a welcome cake."

"No, _I_ made the cake. Sora just whined the whole time." Riku interjected, entering the kitchen with a beautifully designed cake in his hands. "Happy, uh…happy…err…"

"Just take the cake!" Sora exclaimed, grabbing it from Riku's hands and thrusting it in Axel's direction. "It's for you."

Axel blinked at the two of them, slowly smiling. He was so flattered! "You made this for me? Wow. Thanks. No one's ever made me a cake before."

Roxas opened his mouth to protest, but Axel silenced him by correcting himself. "Fine, I mean, no one's ever made me a cake before that _has actually tasted good_."

"Shut up. A second ago you would've tasted anything I gave you." Roxas grumbled, rolling his eyes. "Who's the tease now?"

"I'm pretty sure it's still you." Sora snorted.

Demyx suddenly walked into the room with Cloud and Sephiroth trailing him, looking as if he just solved world hunger. His grin was almost too wide. "Hey guys!"

"Hey, Demyx…" Roxas answered warily, instantly frowning when Demyx perched next to Axel. "What's up? You look so…"

"Satiated." Riku finished, also appearing to be a little disturbed by how happy he looked. "You're blinding us with your smile."

"Axel." Demyx began, completely ignoring Roxas and Riku's comments. "You should go get dressed for our little thing. We need to leave an hour earlier than usual because of the fans."

"Fans?"

"You know…crowds of screaming girls—and guys—trying to rip off my clothes and do me right there on the floor…that kinda thing. If we leave early, we cut that crowd in half." He explained with a suggestive wink. Axel shuddered at the thought. Being trampled to death was the last thing he wanted.

"Fine. I'll see you later, Roxy." Axel smirked, leaning over to give him a quick kiss before taking off for the stairs. The tension in that room could cut a knife. It was the last thing he wanted to be in.

Roxas watched Axel go up the stairs for a moment before narrowing his eyes at Demyx. "Where are you going?"

Demyx faltered for an instant, allowing Cloud to step in front of him and save him. He gave Roxas a disapproving frown. "Roxas. The only reason Demyx is taking Axel out is to apologize for his inappropriate behavior, something you wanted us to do. Why won't you just let him?"

Roxas gaped. He wasn't used to Cloud taking Demyx's side. Usually, Cloud favored him more than the boyfriend-stealing rock star. "Yeah, but—"

"I thought you were better than this." Cloud shook his head. "Really, Rox."

Roxas groaned exasperatedly. "Fine! Fine…go take Axel wherever you want. Just…just stay away from Club Thirteen, okay?"

Demyx batted his eyes innocently. "But why?"

"Because!" Roxas snapped, before wincing and shooting him an apologetic look. "Sorry. It's just…it's dangerous there, okay? Axel would…he'd hate it there."

"Sure, Roxas. I'll try not to." Demyx answered back sweetly. "I really will try."

That didn't sit well with Roxas. Why try when he could just do?

"Great! Well Roxas, I think Pence, Hayner and Olette wanted you to meet them at the clock tower at 9:00. And it's—" Cloud checked his watch. "That time! You better go."

Roxas peered up at his bedroom anxiously. "I wanted to say goodbye to Axel before I—"

"He's a grown man, Rox! Just go!" Cloud shooed him, practically pushing him out of the kitchen and into the front door. "We'll tell him you said bye!"

"Fine! Jeez!" Roxas cried, fumbling with the door knob as Cloud and Demyx continued to push him into the door. "Look, I'm leaving, alright? Stop pushing me!"

"Sorry!" Demyx called out to him as he watched Roxas walk down their drive way and into his car. "See you later!"

Once Roxas was safely in the car and out of sight, Demyx turned to Cloud with a grateful smile. "You saved my ass."

Cloud sighed but gave him an encouraging pat. "Don't worry, you'll learn. Anyway, you better go get dressed and get out of here before Axel changes his mind."

**11:10 P.M.**

Two hours ago, Roxas had been shooed out of his own house by the one sibling he liked the most. Well, behind Sora and Namine, of course.

Now, as he sat on the clock tower, chewing on a sea salt ice cream bar, he was starting to feel uneasy about the whole thing. Why were Demyx and Cloud so eager for him to leave? It just seemed suspicious.

And it wasn't that he didn't like hanging out with Pence, Hayner and Olette. He loved his friends! They were amazing; they moved with him to New York without even being asked. It was just…Axel was too desirable for his own good! All kinds of people had to be hitting on him right now.

The clubs in this town were surprisingly worse than the ones in New York. The clubs in the city were sophisticated. The ones here were trashy. He would know. He used to be a—

"Oh no!" Olette gasped, squinting down at the neon lights from where she was seated on the high clock tower. Roxas immediately sat up. She saw something. Was it Axel?

"What is it?" Pence asked her gently, much more gently than Roxas would've asked her. She shook her head.

"Nothing. I-I just thought I saw…oh, it was probably nothing."

"What is it, dammit?" Hayner demanded impatiently, cocking his head at her. "Spit it out!"

"I just saw a crowd of girls go running into Club Thirteen, all holding Demyx memorabilia."

Roxas froze. Oh god. Demyx _didn't_.

Then it all clicked. Of course. Cloud must have found out and told Demyx to take Axel there in order to drive a wedge between them. Dammit!

"We have to go. _Now_."

**11:30 P.M.**

Roxas entered the club that was so familiar to him, it hurt. Damn Demyx for taking Axel here like this, and not even mentioning it to him. This was his life, dammit. His older brother had no damn business trying to run it.

"Hey Roxas! Haven't seen you in a while!" One of the dancers in the cages called down to him, doing a backbend to see him from where she was hanging. "You finally decided to come back to us?"

Roxas made a disapproving face at her, ignoring the curious looks that his three best friends were shooting him. He never exactly explained to them what he used to do here. Ugh, that cage girl was going to give him away! What made her think that he needed this demeaning shit?

"I've moved on from this. But it's nice to see you." And with that, he grabbed Olette and Pence's shirts and tugged them away from the half-naked cage dancers and towards the bar. At least he knew the bartender would be some help.

"Roxas is pretty serious about this, huh?" Olette whispered to Pence as they stumbled to keep up with Roxas' crazy serial killer pace. Pence nodded furiously.

"I know. I never knew he was so possessive." He whispered back, but unfortunately it wasn't quiet enough. Roxas whirled on his two friends. Jeez, what kind of friends talked about the other friend when he was right there?

"I'm not possessive!" He shouted, glaring at Pence, before whirling back around and stalking off to the bar. "Whatever, I don't care anymore, why don't you two find a cage girl to ogle?"

That was probably harsher than he needed to be, but right now, the only thing on his mind was Axel. He immediately softened at the thought of him. Axel…he thought Roxas was his angel. He couldn't let him know that he used to bartend here, hell, some occasions he even caged danced.

No. He shook his head. Axel couldn't find out about this. And, although he wouldn't admit it to Olette and Pence…Axel was _his_.

But he wasn't possessive at all! Nope. Not even a sliver.

Pushing past all of the grinding bodies and the dancing males, he made his way over to the bar, his eyes flitting across the entire club. No such luck. Damn, he was going to have to do this old school.

"Roxas. What are you doing back here; this place isn't for you anymore." A quiet voice asked him, a voice so quiet, it contrasted with the loud atmosphere of the club. Roxas sighed at the sight of his old friend. He had hoped they would meet on different circumstances. Actually, he had hoped they wouldn't meet in this place at all.

"Zexion…I need your help." Roxas hesitated, eyeing his small, beautiful old bartending partner in indecision. "Can I make an announcement on the head speakers?"

Zex smirked, and suddenly he didn't seem so small and fragile anymore. "Why? Lose someone, Roxas?" When he growled, Zexion added, "Never knew you were so possessive with your ukes."

That was the last straw for his politeness.

"Give me the fucking microphone, Zexion, before I hop over there and get it my fucking self." He spat, earning a couple of appalled stares from the people around him. He glared at them. "What, never heard anyone threaten someone before?"

Zexion gave him a sardonic half-smile. "Calm down, Roxas, I was only playing."

"Well I'm not."

"Did I hit a nerve? Did you really lose your uke?" A pause. "Wait…oh god; you're not even the seme are you? _You're_ the uke!"

Roxas sighed, frustrated and blushing. "C'mon Zex, this is important."

Zexion's teasing, almost cruel demeanor melted, and once again he was simply Zexion, small and fragile and quiet. "I'm sorry, but you know as well as I do that I can't do that."

Damn. He thought for sure that Zexion would let him use the mike, no questions asked, but now he had to go and throw the rule book, the one he himself slaved over back when he was a bartender, back in his face.

Roxas must have been silent for a while, because Zexion suddenly muttered to himself, "Man, you really are possessive."

"I'm not possessive!" Roxas shouted, suddenly aggravated again. Why was everyone saying that?

Zexion watched him in amusement for a couple of seconds before going back to preparing a drink for a new customer. "So where's that cute singer of a brother of yours?" He asked, partly trying to make small talk and partly curious. "Haven't seen him around here in a while."

Roxas scowled at the mention of that fiancé stealing traitor. "Around here somewhere with my boyfriend."

Zexion raised an eyebrow as he handed the customer their drink. "Is that why you're here?"

Roxas remained silent. There was no need for Zex to know everything from him when it was obvious he could figure it out himself. But just as he was about to say something to him, the crowd went crazy, and the DJ cut whatever song was playing abruptly to put on one of Demyx's latest singles.

The second he heard the melodious sound of Demyx's voice, Roxas' whole demeanor darkened angrily. It was time to go get his fiancé.

**11: 35 P.M.**

Axel, with a raised eyebrow, observed the club Demyx had dragged him to a little over an hour ago. And how was it going? Well…in theory, in his bedroom, it had seemed like a perfectly innocent idea, going to a club with his fiancé's brother. It could be, y'know, bonding or whatever.

But now, as he watched the women dressed in scanty clothing (well, the ones dressed, at least) grinding in cages while men and women practically had sex all around him…he realized he'd made a terrible mistake. A mistake that he couldn't believe he made. A mistake that would probably piss off Roxas and a whole damn lot.

How much of a dumbass did he have to be, thinking he could ignore a sexy celebrity hitting on him every chance he got in an atmosphere that practically begged him to have sex with someone?

"Alright, alright, we have a special guest in the house tonight, as if you guys didn't already know!" The DJ shouted as he began playing one of Demyx's singles, making the crowd in the club go crazy. Axel grimaced as a pair of what appeared to be teenage girls began making out right on top of him in their uncontained excitement. Nice.

He needed a drink.

Shoving past the couples, he managed to squeeze his way to the bar, ignoring the way a couple of girls were eyeing him flirtatiously. Any other time he would have gladly done a little flirting himself; Pssh, nothing was wrong with flirting! It was fun and it gave you confidence! But tonight he felt too stupid to care. How in the hell was Roxas supposed to trust him if he couldn't even make wise decisions?

He frowned miserably. Roxas was going to kick his ass once he discovered that he and Demyx actually kissed. Made lip-to-lip contact. Sucked face. Lip lock-

"Is that you Axel?" A soft, familiar voice asked him, and Axel glanced up stonily to see his old best friend from high school, Zexion something. He smirked. Did he _ever_ even know Zexion's last name? Some best friend he was.

"Hey Sexy Zexy!" Axel greeted loudly, now considerably more cheerful at seeing a familiar face- one that was scowling from the detested nickname. Well, at least one that wasn't Demyx's traitorous ass. The purple-haired boy gave him a scathing glare before turning around and starting to work on someone's drink. Axel blinked. Wait…he was the bartender? His smirk returned. Interesting.

"I guess some things never change." Zexion called from over his shoulder, but Axel could have sworn he heard him mumble, "Like your stupidity."

His grin remained effortlessly in place. How come they lost touch? Sexy Zexy was a great pick-me-up! "What's an irresistibly cute guy like you doing in a naughty place like this?"

Zexion slid another fruity, alcoholic concoction down the bar, and turning back to Axel, he leaned in towards him on the bar with an exhausted huff. "Bartending."

Gee, Zexion, because he obviously couldn't see that. "Oh really? I hadn't noticed."

Zexion grinned. "There's another thing that hasn't changed. You're just as unobservant and self-centered as you were in high school."

"Eh well…it's become a habit really." He answered with a shrug, and Zexion laughed. "You here with someone?"

Axel's smirk immediately fell, replaced with a ferocious growl. "Yeah, with a fucking kiss stealer."

Zexion looked amused before straightening and taking another customer's order. "That kind of stuff never seemed to bother you before."

Axel let out a frustrated bark. "I've never been…practically attacked…by my fiancé's hot older brother before."

Zexion spilled the drink he was mixing, much to the chagrin of the man who was waiting to give the drink to the woman he was seducing. Axel snorted. Real men didn't need to get their dates drunk to have their way with them.

His old friend turned around slowly, looking at him with an expression akin to fatherly pride. Axel stiffened and gave him an odd look. He was just sharing a piece of information, a piece of his horrid day. There was no need to _cry_, jeez.

"So it's finally happened to you, eh?" He said softly, and Axel raised an eyebrow. Uh...to what experience was he referring to? Being hit on?

At Axel's skeptical, bewildered look, Zexion tilted his head and said, "Even a guy like you found love."

"The hell do you mean _a guy like me_?" Axel demanded, instantly feeling insulted. What the hell? He came over and chatted him up like they were good buddies and Sexy Zexy rudely insults him?

Zexion grabbed his hand, stopping him from stalking off, and the red head narrowed his eyes, feeling his hand heat up with that recognizable heat, that proverbial rage. _Don't_ touch. The purple-eyed bartender quickly removed his hand, but not before hastening to elucidate himself.

"I wasn't trying to insult you, Axel. I meant that a guy who was living life to the fullest but still was experiencing life knocking him back down was able to fully trust someone with their heart." He explained before looking down at his hands. "I still…I haven't reached that stage yet. It's encouraging to see that you have."

Oh. Axel felt the fire within him simmer down to a slow burn, and his cocky smirk returned back onto his, dare he say it, quite sexy face. "Jealous yet, Sexy Zexy? Not that I can blame you…I'm a hot commodity, obviously, but Roxas is _quite_ the catch."

Zexion snorted in disbelief, almost as an instantaneous reaction. "Me, jealous of you? Don't make me-" Suddenly he paused and spilled the man's drink once more, causing him to just walk off without paying him.

"Can you believe that guy?" Axel scoffed as he watched him go with a sneer. Asshole. People made mistakes. Then he turned back to Zexion with a raised eyebrow. "Anyway, what's wrong _now_?"

"Roxas _Haiku_? He's your _fiancé_?" He sputtered, and Axel nodded, not understanding the problem. "Yeah. What of it? You know him?"

"Of course I know him! And that makes the older brother you were talking about-"

"Demyx." Axel replied scornfully, his eyes flashing dangerously at the name before relaxing back into their usual smug expression.

Zexion finally just shook his head and grabbed one of the nearby beers. He tossed it to Axel, who took it with a curious lift of his brow.

"Trust me; you're going to need this. I just saw him about a minute before you came over here. He was _pissed_. He practically threatened me just to get control of my microphone so he could find you."

Axel swore and took a long swig of the beer Zexion kindly gave him as his old pal went back to bartending the now annoyed and impatient customers. Roxas was here. Damn. He might as well kiss his ass goodbye, because Roxas was going to demolish it when he found out about the kiss.

"Seriously, though," Zexion frowned as he made his way back to his miserable friend, "what the hell were you thinking, coming to this orgy with his flirtatious older brother in the first place without telling him? You should know how possessive he is; hell, even I know that."

Axel scowled. Thanks Zex. Like he didn't already know that. "Guess I'd better go find him."

Zexion nodded like he was stupid before swirling back to his customers. Axel slowly got to his feet to find his fiancé. Better get this over with sooner than later.

"Oh and Axel?"

"Yeah?"

Zexion actually hopped over the bar counter, ignoring the protests from the spectators, to come over to Axel face to face. He gave him a grave look.

"I'm going to tell you something, something that isn't my business, but something I feel like you should know." He began, and Axel narrowed his eyes at him expectantly, but anxiously. "Roxas used to work here with me as a bartender, but he started off as a dancer. That's part of way he's so upset. Try to understand what he has to be feeling right now, okay?"

Axel blinked at him slowly, trying to imagine Roxas up in one of those cages. At first he thought of the sweet, blushing boy that he was able to melt in and couldn't. But when he really thought of Roxas Haiku, possessive, playful and sexy, he could see the blonde up in the cage, moving his sexy body in exotic positions.

This made him feel…a lot of things, he supposed. Jealous…irritated…sad for him…

Why didn't he tell him? They were supposed to be getting married, for Christ sake…

Axel blinked back down at Zexion, who was looking up at him as if he wasn't sure if he should have told him. It was fine…because it appeared as if Roxas had never planned to tell him at all.

"I'll…call you up sometime, Zexy." Axel muttered, giving him a brief salute before shaking his head. What a fucked up night. Well, whatever. Hell, he was just going to have to suck it up and find Roxas. They had more than enough to talk about it once the blonde calmed down.

_If_ the blonde calmed down.

**11:49 P.M.**

Roxas frowned from his perch sitting on the edge of the DJ stand. Normally clubbers weren't allowed to be on the stand, considering DJ Takashi was a stickler about his space. But Roxas was used to being an exception, and he had made many a friend when he was working at this club. At least his past job gave him _some_ kind of positive benefits.

"Ay, Roxas! You see your man?" DJ Takashi yelled over at him, moving with the beat of the next hit he began to mix. The crowd changed the pace of their dancing accordingly with shouts of exhilaration. "He has to be somewhere around here!"

Roxas snorted, finally spotting his redheaded idiot leaning against the wall on the far left of the club, his demeanor a warning to anyone who dared fuck with him tonight.

Hmm, he was going to be somewhere alright. Somewhere far, far away from Demyx and this goddamn club.

**11:50 P.M.**

Demyx grimaced as he searched the crowd for the man he unsuccessfully tried to seduce. Jeez, this whole seduction thing was getting beyond ridiculous. What did he have to do to get Axel to stop running away from him and see that _he_ was the one for him, not Roxas?

Ignoring the clinging arms that shot out from every person he passed who were just bubbling with excitement at seeing him in the flesh, he crossed his arms and sighed. He had forgotten what it was like to be a normal person; a person who couldn't get whatever he wanted by just blinking.

This was why Axel was so special. He could actually resist him…he saw Demyx for more than just a celebrity.

_And_ Axel was hot. Let's not forget that.

But there was the tricky business of Axel's stubbornness. Or should he say Axel's loyalty. It was maddening! Why couldn't that loyalty be directed towards something that would appreciate it, like him?

"Demyx, I love you!" A woman who had suddenly jumped out in front of him cried, tugging on his tight black shirt.

He smirked. "I love you too."

He promised himself long ago that he would never be mean to a fan, no matter how annoying or how obsessed they were. Besides, since this was his hometown, most people didn't fawn _too_ much over him.

It was as he was mulling over this that he saw a flash of red hair looming in the distance, owned by a tall, sulking person. Axel!

Time for take two!

**11:55 P.M.**

Axel sneezed. Twice. And that did not sit well with him.

Even in his sulking, he was a very perceptive person, and he had the feeling that doom was about to be inflicted upon him. Again.

He glanced around fleetingly. Was there anywhere to hide? No, not unless you counted the miniscule space between the grinding bodies as hiding places. Truth be told, he was so lean that he probably could fit between them. But that was both unsanitary and gross, and he had enough seduction pooling in his pores. Ew.

It was as he was looking around that he noticed two blonde heads coming in his direction from opposite sides of the club. One was small with spikes all over the place, looking both enraged and relieved at the same time, while the other was tall and muscled being trailed by what had to be the entire club.

Axel gulped. Well, it was nice that he managed to stay alive for so long…now it was time to meet his end.

"Axel!" Demyx exclaimed with a little laugh, unaware of the proximity of his brother. "I've been looking everywhere for you! After our kiss, you just disappeared!"

"_What_?" Roxas demanded murderously as he finally reached them, and Axel shut his eyes in frustration. Damn Demyx! Now Roxas knew about the kiss before he had a chance to explain it. This wasn't going to end well.

"Now Roxas, it isn't what it sounds like, okay? Just calm down-" He began, but the angry blonde quickly cut him off.

"Calm down? _Calm down?_ Why the _hell_ should I do that? So you can feed me some lie?" Roxas snapped, looking angrier than Axel had ever seen him. "Jeez, Axel, I thought I could trust you!"

The entire place seemed to be silent, as if this was the first fight that had ever happened in the club. Axel sincerely doubted that, but obviously any fight that the famous Demyx was involved in had to be good. It would only be a matter of time before the press was called.

But at the moment, he could care less. In fact, strangely enough, he was kind of angry at Roxas, too. He was kind of acting like a jerk, screaming at him as if he was some little kid. And Axel, as partial as he was to Roxas, wasn't going to take that shit from anyone.

"You have your nerve, Roxas." Axel sneered, crossing his arms and glaring down at him. "When were you going to tell me about your amazing cage dancing career?"

"Whaaaat?" Demyx gasped unconvincingly. "Roxas, I had no idea you danced here!"

Roxas flinched back as if Axel had slapped him. "Who…who told you about that?" He gasped.

Axel's eyes narrowed, ignoring his question. So he admitted it! "You weren't going to tell me at all, were you?"

Roxas fell silent and scowled at the floor. Finally, he muttered, "What's it matter?"

"'What's it matter?'" Axel exploded, throwing his arms up in the air incredulously. Oh come on! Surely Roxas had a better excuse than that. "What do you mean, 'what's it matter'? We're supposed to tell each other everything!"

"Then why didn't you call and tell me you were coming to a freaking sex club with my hot older brother who obviously has a crush on you, huh?" Roxas shot back, gaining his voice, and the upper hand, back again. "You weren't planning to tell me about the kiss, either, huh?"

Zexion, who had been pushing his way through the crowd, suddenly appeared, looking more than a little anxious. "Hey, guys, you're going to have to take this argument outside. The owner is threatening to call the cops."

Roxas whirled, suddenly glaring at Zexion with something akin to hatred. "And you! How dare you tell him something so personal about my life! I wish everyone would just get out of my goddamn business and leave me alone!"

"Dammit Roxas, don't yell at him! He was just being a good friend!" Axel shouted back, disliking the way Roxas was trying to blame everyone but himself. Take some responsibility!

"Roxas, Axel, Demyx, please! Yell at me, hate me, whatever, just go outside and do it! I don't want to see you guys get arrested!" Zexion pleaded. Roxas continued to glare at him dispassionately before shaking his head and clutching his spikes with both hands.

"You know what, Zexion? I don't care if I get arrested. My heart has already committed a crime by loving someone that I can't trust." Roxas whispered, averting his eyes from Axel's own fiery green orbs. "The engagement's off."

Roxas was speaking so quietly that Axel couldn't have he heard him correctly. "What? W-What did you say?"

"I said," Roxas began, his voice growing in intensity, "that the engagement is off! I _don't_ want to marry you. And….And I don't love you anymore!"

Axel felt his breath catch in his throat, and a dull ache pounded at his heart. What…what….what should he do? How did he stop Roxas from…from not loving him? This was too heavy; _this_, this he couldn't handle.

"I…" Axel trailed, struggling to find the words that would make it seem as if Roxas didn't just break his heart in the worst way possible. "You…we…"

Roxas, watching him from under his lashes, pretended as if he couldn't tell that his words had just cut Axel deeply. He didn't want this either. But he couldn't take back what he just said. It was too late for that.

But just as he was about to give in and deny everything he had said, Demyx stepped forward and pressed his lips against Axel's, causing the entire club to erupt in excited screams and catcalls.

"It doesn't matter if you do or don't want him anymore. We're together now. When we kissed, we connected, which is more than I can say for the two of you." Demyx explained snidely, giving Roxas a triumphant grin. "Face it, you lost."

Roxas laughed darkly as all thoughts of reconciliation vanished from his mind. "I lost, did I?"

No one could predict the sickening crack that Roxas' fist would cause Demyx's nose. As girls began to scream in fear for Demyx's beautiful face, the blonde terror turned to Axel and announced coldly, "I didn't lose. I _quit_."

Axel watched Roxas stalk away with raw panic. "Roxas, wait!"

"I hope you two are happy together!" He shouted without turning around, and he soon disappeared between the bodies.

Axel felt his breathing quicken, as if he had just been running for miles, and he couldn't seem to catch it again. "What's…what's happening?"

"It's the po po!" Someone in the crowd shouted, and suddenly everyone was running in all directions to avoid being charged as bystanders to a supposed attempt at murder.

"Shit, it's the cops! Axel, we have to go!" Demyx cried, shaking him and trying to break him from his self-induced mini trance. "Zexion is waving is towards the back, I think there's another exit over there!"

Axel blinked rapidly, still trying to grasp what had just happened as Demyx pulled him towards some kind of exit. Did he and Roxas just break up? Roxas didn't…Roxas didn't love him anymore…

He pressed his fingers to his temples and shut his eyes tightly, willing all of this to vanish as if it had never happened to begin with.

**2:00 A.M.**

Cloud paced around his room anxiously, just waiting for Axel and Roxas to walk through the door in the midst of an argument. This was going to be epic!

"Is it true?" A deep, hesitant voice suddenly asked from his door. Cloud whirled around. Leon.

"Is what true?" He questioned, smiling at his long-time best friend. This was good…it looked like Leon was finally coming around; he was finally ready to be his friend again!

Leon ignored his smile and stayed in the entry-way. "Is it true you told Demyx to take Axel to the club that Roxas used to dance at; the club he is insecure about?"

Cloud's smile became a bit more mischievous at the mention of his ingenious plan. "Hell yeah, that was me. What of it?"

Instead of looking impressed at the sound of his plan, Leon just looked sick. "You're becoming just like Sephiroth, aren't you?"

Cloud's face fell in astonishment. "What? What are you talking about?"

"I mean," Leon continued as if he had never even spoken, "you've always been protective of your siblings—especially Roxas, but you've never been…vindictive. Cruel."

Cloud began to feel the stirrings of anger in the pit of his stomach. "Oh, is that it, then? You're just going to come into my house after ignoring my calls for months and judge me? You barely even know me now!"

The muscular man in his doorway fell silent at his words. Finally, he muttered, "You're right, Cloud. I don't know you anymore. Because the Cloud I used to know…the Cloud I was in love with…would never purposely hurt his little brother, or anyone else, for that matter."

Now it was Cloud's turn to be speechless.

"Sorry to bother you. Seifer and I are heading out. See you…sometime." Leon said sadly, and as Cloud stared at him wordlessly, he turned around and shut the door.

Cloud blinked for a moment, registering all that Leon had said and accused him of. Was it true? Had being married to a man like Sephiroth changed him? Tarnished him?

No. None of this was Sephiroth's fault. This was all his doing; Cloud was the one who had become a power-hungry, sibling-owning jerk.

Sephiroth suddenly entered the room, looking more than a little annoyed. "Was that Leon I just saw leaving this room?"

Cloud sighed as he threw himself onto the bed. "Seph, be honest. Have I changed?"

"No." Sephiroth answered without a hint of hesitation. Cloud knew he was being honest—Sephiroth didn't play games—but that didn't make him feel any better. He couldn't get Leon's sad expression out of his mind. He hated to disappoint people; most of all, his best friend.

"Leon found out I was the one behind Demyx taking Roxas to the club. He thinks I've changed for the worst." He explained, burying his face in his pillow. "What if he's right?"

Sephiroth relaxed his aggressive stance (he was still annoyed at Leon having been in his room) and went to sit next to Cloud. He remained silent for a moment before softly admitting, "I love all sides of you."

"So you admit that I'm different than how I used to be!" Cloud accused, sitting up and searching his husband's eyes with heartbreaking seriousness. "I've changed!"

"You've grown." Sephiroth amended harshly, disliking Cloud's implication that he was lying. "That isn't the same as being different."

Cloud fell silent at Sephiroth's no-nonsense tone.

"If Leon wishes for you to be the same innocuous boy you were a year ago, he is deluding himself. You are an adult now, Cloud. You've experienced trials and tribulations that only married couples can face. And still, you are able to laugh and love life as no other man has." Sephiroth explained lazily, as if the whole conversation bored him. "Do not allow Leon's jealousy to make you question yourself."

Cloud nodded grudgingly. "You're right."

"Now," Sephiroth began with a shrug, "your actions toward your brother's fiancé were, in fact, vindictive with little cause. However, you were only enacting what I had suggested, and for that, no one can accuse you of being _cruel_. Merely… irrationally overprotective."

Cloud fell back against the pillow. Great. Now he was back to feeling bad.

"Maybe I did get a little vindictive…" He admitted, running a hand through his spikes. Before Sephiroth could answer, the front door downstairs suddenly creaked open, cutting through the quiet house with loud clarity.

Sephiroth glanced towards the clock. "It is a little after two in the morning."

Cloud winced. "It has to be Roxas or Axel."

The couple quietly left the room and went to the staircase that overlooked the first floor of the house. There they had a clear view of the front door without having to actually move downstairs. What they saw shocked them.

There, in a small, blonde, crumpled heap was Roxas, cradling a beautiful diamond ring in his hands.

That's when it hit Cloud.

"Sephiroth," he gasped, turning towards his husband in shock. "What did you say Axel was to Roxas again?"

Sephiroth raised an eyebrow before self-assuredly answering, "Axel is Roxas' fiancé."

Cloud was suddenly filled with a peculiar mix of astonishment and remorse. What had he done?

"H-How do you know?"

"Namine confessed it to me yesterday after Roxas told her." Sephiroth answered, but not before shooting him an 'are you a dumbass?' look. "In addition…I have eyes. Where were yours?"

**2:04 A.M.**

Sora blushed as he switched his cell phone from his left ear to his right. The screen of his Droid was sweaty and filled with bacteria due to it being beside his ears for so long, but he didn't care. All he knew was that Riku was telling him everything he wanted to hear…despite it being over the telephone.

"Sora, what am I going to do with you?" Riku mulled absently from the other line, his voice slightly deeper and sultrier as a result of their intimate nighttime chat.

Sora blushed even deeper. He already had a couple of ideas, none of them PG.

"Riku…" He smiled, playing with his bedspread, "Is it true what you said before?"

"What?"

"That you think I'm handsome?" Sora whispered, covering his face with his hands in embarrassment. As much as he liked talking to Riku like this, he had to admit it was a little embarrassing. He wasn't used to being mushy and stuff.

Not that he was complaining.

Riku groaned. "Sora, I told you that I thought you were beautiful. Not handsome. Saying your handsome makes you sound like some Prince who has just rescued me or something."

"So? That doesn't sound so bad to me." He argued, laughing while Riku retaliated with all the reasons he couldn't possibly be handsome.

That's when he heard the front door creak open slowly, like some kind of horror film.

"Uh, Riku. I'm going to have to call you back." Sora frowned, opening his door and venturing to the stair case. "I need to check on something."

After shutting his phone and safely depositing it into his pocket, he poked his spiky head over the railing and squinted at the door. Was that Roxas? All he could see was a little ball of blonde, rocking back and forth like some kind of insane asylum patient.

"Sora." A voice suddenly murmured, and he whipped around. What the hell—

When he turned, however, he saw that it was only Sephiroth and Cloud who had called him. Then they saw what he was seeing: one very broken Roxas.

"What happened?" He demanded, pointing to his depressed twin. This was unacceptable. Sora hated when people got hurt, but he hated it even more when it was his brother. Someone was asking to get their ass kicked.

"They were engaged, Sor..." Cloud informed him softly, pointing towards a gorgeous diamond ring that was slightly visible from Roxas' scrunched up hands. "…And we ruined it."

Sora was silent for a tense moment, registering the enormity of what Cloud had just told him. That meant all of the ruined conversations and overprotective actions from his family and friends…all of that…were tiny stabs at Axel and Roxas' relationship.

Sora sighed and began descending down the stairs. There was only one thing left to do.

"Come on. Let's go fix this."

**2:15 A.M.**

Axel felt sick to his stomach for what had to be the tenth time this night. And it only seemed to get worse with time.

"Don't worry Axel! You'll be even happier than you were now that you're free!" Demyx babbled. Axel wasn't quite sure what he was saying, but he knew it was some freaking nonsense.

He could never be happy without Roxas. He didn't _want_ to be free!

He _wanted_ to be tied down, dammit!

But not literally. He'd had enough of _that_, thank you.

Zexion glanced over at him as he led them through an alley that would lead to his apartment. "Axel…I feel partly responsible for all of this."

He glared at him. That was for damn sure. "Oh, you think?" He answered sarcastically.

His old friend shrugged and turned his attention back forward. "You're angry, I get it. You don't want to talk right now."

Axel remained silent. It wasn't that he didn't want to talk. It was that he didn't want to talk to the two guys who were partly responsible for breaking him and his fiancé up. It was a perfectly reasonable reaction to not want to talk to the guys who fucked up his life, right?

"So Axel!" Demyx gushed, grabbing his hand and swinging it. "When should we announce to everyone that we're together?"

Axel snatched his hand from his grasp. He didn't hold hands with guys that were life-ruiners. "Are you crazy? We aren't together now, we certainly weren't together in the club, and we won't be together in the near future, got it?"

Demyx looked crestfallen. "Where is this coming from?"

Axel shut his eyes and counted to three. It wasn't going to help, getting all angry at Demyx. The singer had already been punched by his little brother once. He didn't need to be hit again.

Still…he deserved it.

"Demyx, have you not noticed that I'm completely and utterly taken already?" Axel snapped, more than a little tired of his antics. "Can't you take a freaking hint?

Zexion gave him a pointed frown. "Axel! Don't take your frustrations out on him."

Was he serious?

"Oh, and why the hell not?" Axel hollered, following Zexion so closely that he was practically on his heels. "Why can't I take my frustrations out on the guy who tried to seduce me? He's pretty much ruined everything!"

Now Demyx's whole body seemed to slump. "Jeez, I didn't know you hated me, Axel."

Now, no one could ever dispute that Axel was murderous when he was angry. But few people realized that he was actually a pretty reasonable guy. Hell, he was even known to be nice. This, unfortunately for Axel, was one of those times.

"Look, Demyx. I'm sorry, okay? I don't hate you." He gritted out from between his teeth, frowning when the blonde singer perked up. "Hey, that doesn't mean I love you or anything."

"You will once Roxas is out of the picture." Demyx muttered, thoughtlessly vocalizing his thought. But Axel heard it. Ho boy, he heard it!

That was it. Enough was enough.

It was time to be a man and let Demyx know how things worked around here.

"Demyx!" He shouted, grabbing him by his collar and pressing him against the brick wall. Zexion gaped and seemed to have a heart attack, but Axel ignored him and looked deeply into his green eyes. "I'm only going to say this once, so listen up. I am in love with Roxas. I will never be in love with you while we are together, because Roxas is a possessive little entity that requires all of my heart to love. He is my fiancé. He is my life. He is the only man for me. Got it memorized?"

Demyx eyes were so wide, they looked like flying saucers. It would have been funny, actually, if he wasn't so annoyed.

"Y-You and Rox…were engaged?" Demyx gasped, looking so incredibly shocked, Axel had to wonder why it was so surprising to everyone. "Why didn't you say anything?"

Axel faltered. Good fucking question.

"Well," He began uncertainly, letting go of Demyx and scratching the back of his head. "I guess I kind of liked the attention."

As he said it, Axel realized with absolute certainty that it was true. He liked Demyx's affection…if not just for the ego boost. That could only mean one thing…

This was his entire fault.

He scowled.

"Dammit."

**2:50 A.M.**

All the Haiku family members and their friends sat in the living room of the giant, farm-like house, simply staring at each other. Well, all the family members and friends except for the ones involved—Roxas, Axel, Demyx and Zexion. But the majority certainly was there.

And none of them were happy.

"I can't believe I didn't realize my baby was engaged." Hannah spoke softly, her voice trembling. "You could practically _see_ the love in his eyes."

"Now all they're filled with is hurt." Sora mumbled from his spot on the couch next to Riku. He figured calling him over would only help an already screwed-up night. Riku nodded in agreement, running a hand through his hair. "He wasn't even this hurt when we broke up."

"Is that what everyone is so worried about? The fact that he was engaged? The fact that they're broken up now? Shouldn't we be worrying about the solution? Aren't we going to do something?" Rikku cried, jumping up from Cloud's lap. He rolled his eyes and roughly pulled her back down.

"Put a sock in it. Don't you think we know that?" He huffed, tossing her onto Sephiroth. The other male raised a cool eyebrow at him before chucking her back to him.

"Dammit, stop that!" Rikku demanded indignantly before finally just standing up with her arms crossed. "The point I was trying to make is that sitting here isn't going to help anything."

"What do you suggest?" Namine asked her quietly.

Rikku pursued her lips at Yuna and Lulu, who both stared back at her blankly. Hell if they knew. The blonde sighed pointedly. "Well?"

"How should we know?" Yuna cried while Lulu added, "We don't even live here."

"Neither does Axel." Leon, who had been invited back to the house after much begging from Cloud, threw out, sinking deeper into the couch he was sitting on. Seifer punched him in the arm. "Stupid. That doesn't matter."

Rikku's eyes widened, and suddenly a terrible, amazing idea popped into her head. "I've got it!"

"Oh no…" Sora groaned, burying his face into Riku's chest.

**3:30 A.M.**

"What am I supposed to do now? Do I go back to the house, like a creep? Or do I stay away, like a creep?" Axel groaned as the three of them stood in front of Zexion's flat in the downtown area. He was contemplating calling a cab or convincing Demyx to drive him back to the house, but he wasn't sure if that was such a great idea.

It took forever for the Haikus to like him. Now that he and Roxas weren't together anymore, how long would it take for them to forgive him?

"Who knows and who cares! Look at this place!" Demyx exclaimed, checking out Zexion's pad in awe. "This is freaking amazing!"

Axel had to agree with him on that. It was pretty freaking amazing.

"Come on in. Take a load off, enjoy, please." Zexion offered grandly, opening the door and leading them inside. "Surprisingly, my bartending skills have been good to me."

Demyx seemed to be looking at Zexion in an entirely new light. "You're so awesome."

"Coming from a celebrity, I'll take that as an immense compliment." Zexion smiled, hiding a blush behind the hair swooped over a side of his face.

Axel grimaced. It wasn't that he didn't like to see blossoming love. It was just that _his_ love was doing the opposite! And right now, he didn't want to see the two people who helped ruin his life starting a new relationship!

"Guys, back to me, okay?" Axel snapped, folding his arms and leaning against the wall right next to the front door. "Should I go back to the house?"

Demyx pursed his lips. "Nah, I don't think Roxas will want to be anywhere near you right now. He already punched me, his own brother. Who knows who he'll punch next?"

**3:45 A.M.**

Roxas punched the strawberry cupcake in his hand and watched it go soaring into the air, landing with a soft thud on Sora's carpet. He hated Riku's too-sugary sweets. They gave him a headache and made him feel ten pounds heavier than before.

But, he supposed, it was nice that his ex boyfriend was trying to cheer him up. Exes certainly didn't tend to do that. Then again, Roxas _did_ look a little crazy when he first came in the house, what with all of that dramatic rocking back and forth as if he belonged in the loony bin.

He glanced at the Mickey Mouse clock hanging in Sora's room. It was almost four o'clock. Where was Axel? Was he going to come back to the house?

Roxas hoped he would. This was ridiculous. They should be together, working this all out. Then again, he _did_ tell the man that he didn't love him anymore. That would hurt anyone.

"Aw, fuck!" Roxas sighed loudly as he plopped down on Sora's bed, causing him to bang his head on the headboard. Double fuck. Now he was probably going to wind up with a concussion, knowing his luck.

Why the hell did he tell Axel he didn't love him anymore? That wasn't true. In fact, he wasn't sure he could ever stop loving him, even if he wanted to.

He was just so mad at him! He should have known better than to go to that club with Demyx behind his back! He had the whole damn day to tell him Demyx asked him to go, and he didn't use any of those opportunities. How were they going to have a lasting relationship if they didn't trust each other?

"Axel will come back." Roxas said to no one in particular, staring up gloomily at the ceiling. He was afraid if he didn't, they really would be over. They _had_ to work this out.

They just had to.

Suddenly, Riku popped his head inside his room. Instantly he groaned. Why was he everywhere?

"What?" Roxas snapped at him, shooting him an irritated look. If he was here to tease him…

"I thought maybe you might want to talk." Riku offered kindly, entering the room a bit more. Roxas' anger melted. Jeez, look at him, taking his frustrations out on Riku. He was just being a good friend!

Except, Roxas noticed with a wary expression on his face, friends didn't walk around shirtless when they knew their perfect, Adonis bodies made the other uncomfortable. They didn't lick their lips as suggestively as Riku was either.

And they sure as hell didn't lock the door behind them.

**11:32 A.M.**

Roxas awoke the next morning wrapped comfortingly in long, lean arms. Before he could stop himself, he jerked upright, his heart beating anxiously and excitedly. Could it be…?

"Axel?" He cried hopefully, nudging the body covered in blankets with his toe. The body groaned huskily, stretching in a catlike manner before sitting up. All of the cover fell aside to reveal…

"Riku. Oh. It's just you." Roxas grumbled, yanking the blankets out of Riku's grasp and nestling himself underneath them. "Go away."

Riku stretched again, this time reaching his arms to the sky, showing off his rippling muscles. Roxas huffed and remained silent. This was the quickly becoming the worst morning ever. Why the hell was he showing off his body this early in the day? In fact, what was he even doing in his bed?

"Since you were so emotional last night, I came in to check on you this morning. When I came in, you looked cold, so I wrapped my arms around you to heat you up." Riku explained, almost as if he read his mind. "I figured since I'm so goddamn hot, it would warm you right up!"

Roxas scowled even deeper. It was official. Now it really _was_ the worst morning ever.

"Well," Roxas grumbled slowly, "do you mind leaving now? You can tell Sora I'm fine."

Riku glanced over at him speculatively. "You don't look fine."

Roxas rolled his eyes. Captain Obvious.

"When someone says they're fine, obviously they aren't. But because they say they're fine, that clearly means that they want you to leave them the hell alone. Understand?" He explained through clenched teeth, struggling to remain friendly.

Riku scratched his head with a grin. "I don't even know what the hell you just said."

Roxas sighed obnoxiously before sitting up in the bed. Looks like he wasn't going to be left alone today. "Did Axel come home last night?"

Riku frowned and opened his mouth, preparing to answer, when Cloud opened the door, peeking his head inside the room. Roxas eyed him warily. What was going on _now_?

"Morning, Rox. How'd you sleep?" His older brother asked him softly; as if he was afraid any loud noise was going to break him. Roxas scowled. This was starting to get silly.

"I'm _fine_." He reiterated, an annoyed gleam beginning to form in his cloudy blue eyes. "Where's Axel?"

"In his room." Cloud and Riku both answered slowly, after glancing at each other. Unfortunately, Roxas was up and out of the bed before either of them could finish their sentence. "Wait, Rox, he doesn't want to-"

Roxas padded barefoot to the room Axel was staying in, his mind working in overdrive. When did he get back? Did he want to talk? Did he hate him now? Were they going to make up?

Finally, he reached the door. He took a deep breath. _Pull it together, Roxas_.

"Axel?" He called out, opening the door. Yep, there he was: tall, powerful and sexy, standing next to the foot of the bed with a tank top in his hand. He wasn't wearing a shirt either; his abs glistened in all of their milky brilliance. With a painful thud, Roxas remembered how noble Axel had been about respecting his family and not having sex.

Axel was always giving. But why couldn't he give him his trust?

Almost guiltily, green eyes met azure ones.

"Roxas." Axel said, a hint of surprise coloring his words. "What are you…?"

"Why are you packing?" Roxas asked him accusingly, his eyes having just found the suitcase on the bed, already filled with Axel's clothes. Clothes that just three days ago, Roxas himself had packed for him…

Axel sighed. Damn Cloud and Riku for not keeping Roxas on a tighter leash. Then again, who could?

"Roxas, I think maybe we need some space." Axel murmured, reciting the words Demyx and Zexion had encouraged him to say just a couple of hours ago. "This is starting to get too serious."

"Serious." Roxas repeated, staring at him suspiciously. "That's the whole point of marriage, isn't it?"

Axel winced. Roxas' tone was so sharp, so rough. "Well, yeah, but—"

"I don't believe you." He interrupted him loudly, closing the gap between them by taking a small step. "This doesn't feel like something you would do to me."

"What do you mean?" Axel snapped, averting his gaze. Damn it, Roxas, let him end this while both of them were still whole! "This is what I want."

Roxas was suddenly right behind him. He could feel the heat just radiating from his body. Oh god, Axel couldn't do this. He knew Demyx and Zexion were just full of hot air.

Exhibit A:

Axel: I miss him already.

Zexion: No, you don't! A lasting relationship takes time and space!

Demyx: Damn straight!

Axel: So you think we should…take a break?

Zexion: Not a break, per se. But a breather.

Demyx: Yep…damn straight!

Axel: I don't want to hurt him, though.

Zexion: In the long run, you won't be. You'll be strengthening the relationship!

Demyx: That's true. Damn straight!

Axel: But Zex…are you sure this will work? What if he thinks we're breaking up?

Zexion: Technically, you are. But once you get back together, you'll have a relationship that's practically perfect!

Demyx: Oh, definitely. Damn str—

Axel: _Don't say it!_ Just shut up, already! I'm sick of hearing your voice, which I know is weird since I have all of your CDs. But you know what I mean!

Demyx: Okay. Damn…

Zexion: Straight.

Axel:…

It seemed like a great idea at the time, but now that he was actually doing it, it seemed like the biggest mistake in the world. How could being away from Roxas possibly be the right decision? He turned to face him—

And was assaulted with searing, emotional kisses to his face, his neck…any and everything. Roxas' arms clasped themselves around his neck as Axel automatically pulled him against his long, lean frame. Their tongues intertwined around each other, reflecting the way their bodies were connected. _Fuck, yes._

This right here was the answer. Being together was always the answer, right? Axel wasn't sure if that was true or not, but right now, in this moment, it was the only answer that made sense.

He shoved Roxas on top of the bed, pushing aside folded clothes to make space, as Roxas sat up on his elbows, gazing hungrily at him. Their lips met once more, even rougher and more passionate than before. This was a dance they both were very familiar with; it was only natural for Roxas to spread his legs seductively at the same moment Axel fumbled with his belt and zippers.

Just as Axel's elongated, spindly fingers dipped inside Roxas' boxers, Riku stumbled into the room through the door that they had forgotten to close. Mentally, Axel cursed the day doors…and Rikus…were invented. They had done nothing but screw him over!

But Riku wasn't even paying attention to them. Actually, it looked like he had been _thrown_ in the room. But by whom?

They all peered to the side to see Sora standing in the hallway, looking more than a little pissed at his crush. Axel raised an eyebrow. Interesting.

"You're ruining everything! Now go get Roxas before he tells Axel what happened between you two last night!" Sora hissed at him, trying to keep his voice down. Unfortunately, he had yet to notice Axel and Roxas blatantly staring at him from inside of the room.

Riku groaned under his breath as he obliviously turned around. Upon seeing Axel and Roxas tangled up in each other, eyeing him suspiciously, he froze. But of course, being Riku, he quickly wiped it away and grinned. "Oh, hey!"

Axel suddenly put two and two together. The Halloween make out session between Riku and Roxas. The trust issues. Sora whispering about 'what happened between them last night'.

His jaw tightened. Of course.

He stiffly began to buckle his pants back up as he sat upright, running rigid fingers through his hair. Roxas' eyes widened as he too figured out what was going on.

"Axel! No, it's not what you think!" He cried out, reaching out to touch him, but Axel jerked roughly out of his reach. He climbed off of him so quickly one would think he had cooties. He glared down at Roxas in disgust. He couldn't believe he was stupid enough to trust him with his love.

"I'm not fucking stupid!" Axel shouted, violently grabbing his suitcase from the floor and striding out of the room. He shot a murderous look at Riku as he passed him, not even bothering to kick his ass, although that's the first thing that came to mind.

Roxas stared at Axel's retreating back in shock. What just happened? Did they just break up over…_Riku_?

Riku had, thankfully (for his own safety), lost the grin on his face, but had replaced it with a grimace. He tore his gaze from Sora to settle it on Roxas. "Um…what just happened?"

Roxas strode over to him, raising his fist to deck him, but lowered his arm just as soon as he raised it. There was no point in hurting Riku. This was his mess, not Riku's.

"You just became the reason Axel hates me." Roxas answered with a sigh, struggling to prevent his tears from flowing in front of Riku. "Can you…can you please leave me alone?"

Riku nodded helplessly before walking out of the room, closing the door behind him. The minute he left the room, he shot a glare to Sora, who looked as equally horrified as he did.

"Did we just-"

"Fuck that up? Yeah, we did." Riku groaned, palming his forehead. Rikku was going to kill them!

**12:00 P.M.**

"You what?" Rikku roared from her post on the couch between Yuna and Paine. The two girls looked just as angry as she did. They may not live there and they may not be related to the Haikus, but they knew when their friend had been screwed over. "Do you know how much work I put into telling Demyx and Zexion what to say to Axel? How much forward thinking I had to display?"

"Was it really that hard? I mean, all you told Zexion to do was convince Axel that they needed 'space and time', right?" Seifer asked unhelpfully, shrugging impassively at her. "A monkey could've done that."

The Haikus, plus a few additions, were all in a circle, seated in loveseats, lounge chairs, and couches in the family room; it was the one place they all knew Roxas wouldn't want to be.

"Monkeys don't speak." Namine pointed out softly. Seifer gave her a mocking grin.

"Neither do you, most of the time."

Leon growled at him in warning before turning his attention back to Cloud, a fact that Sephiroth didn't seem to be enjoying. Cloud, however, seemed to be blissfully unaware of the power struggling occurring because of him.

He gave Rikku a puzzled look. "How did you know that was going to bring them together? What if Axel really had broken up with Roxas?"

Rikku sat down gloomily, still glaring at Riku and Sora. "I knew Roxas wasn't going to believe that it was Axel who had come up with the idea. So in Rox's mind, he was going to have to do everything he could to erase that thought from his head. Because of that, he would be willing to apologize and seduce Axel for all that he's worth."

Riku coughed. "It _did_ seem to be working."

"Of course it was!" Rikku snapped, throwing a macaroon at his head. The silver-haired boy rolled his eyes at her. Where'd she even get that? "I said I was sorry!"

"What happened last night between you and Roxas?" Namine asked curiously, staring at Riku accusingly. He chuckled and stretched his legs out, throwing one over the other and resting his feet on the coffee table.

"Well," He began charismatically, tossing her a confident grin that made her blush, "what happened was this…"

_Roxas stared wantonly at Riku's perfectly chiseled body. Why, oh why, did he ever break up with him? He was just so perfect in every way humanly possible_.

"Okay, wait, Roxas would never think something like that." Cloud interjected, annoyed. "If you're going to tell us the story, tell it right."

Riku eyed Cloud in a manner that could only mean STFU!, before continuing.

"_Why, you perfect man, are you visiting me? The weak, the fragile, the beautiful…Roxas Haiku?" Roxas wanted to know, sitting up from his bed. He gasped as his covers slid down his body, revealing his naked frame._

"_Your clothes…" Riku murmured deeply in concern. "They've vanished."_

"_I-I…I was thinking about you and I just got so hot, so heated. I had to chill off somehow."_

"Oh my god, Roxas would seriously hurt you if he heard this!" Rikku giggled, looking around as if her temperamental brother might appear out of thin air.

"He would agree that this is the truth!" Riku disagreed, smirking at Sora, who looked more than a little put off at this 'truthful' version of the story. But whatever, he'd get over it. "Anyway, pay attention, Sor, this is the good part."

"_Roxas, I know what you want, but I can't. I'm in love with your twin, Sora." Riku admitted softly, striding up to Roxas and grabbing his hand. "We made love tonight."_

"What?" Sora sputtered, spitting out the macaroon Rikku had thrown at Riku earlier. "When the hell did this happen?"

"Oh, it happened, I assure you." Riku grinned, squeezing his thigh. "All of that pleasure must have messed with your memory."

"I…you…we…" Sora stuttered, his entire face beat red. "J-Just finish the story, okay?"

"_I guess I'll just have to accept that. Well, can we still…talk?" Roxas begged him, rubbing Riku's hand against his smooth, tender cheek. _

"_I guess. Shall I come over and cuddle with you?" He ventured, stepping inside the room. "Here let me lock the door to enclose us and make us feel more comfortable._

"The end!" Riku announced, grinning cheekily. Everyone stared at him in astonishment.

"You know, I really didn't think you were that creative. But I guess I was wrong!" Demyx declared from the other side of the room, smirking when all eyes stared at him in surprise. "We got here just in time for the end of Riku's crap tale."

Sora was still watching Riku anxiously. "So...you and Roxas didn't hook up last night?"

Riku lifted his head and laughed. As if. "That ship has definitely sailed, Sor." Then he glared at Demyx. "And it wasn't a crap tale. It was the truth!"

Zexion cleared his throat, stepping in the middle of the lounging Haiku siblings and perching on Namine's prized sculpture of Hercules' Megara. "So, okay, according to Riku's crap tale—"

"It wasn't a crap tale, dammit!"

"—Roxas and Riku didn't do anything last night. So all of this is just one big misunderstanding brought on by Sora's stupidity." He finished, adjusting the hair that covered one of his eyes triumphantly. He expected someone to compliment him on his conclusive abilities, but all he got was,

"Who the hell are you?"

Zexion frowned at the older looking version of Demyx and Roxas. That must be Cloud, if his deductions were correct. But what was the deal with his attitude? Cloud was staring at him as if he was some kind of stranger! The nerve! He had been friends—well, okay, _acquaintances_ with Demyx for practically a year. And, if things went the way he hoped they would, soon he and the sexy singer would be more than just that…

"His name is Zexion and his house in amazing!" Demyx gushed, rushing over to him and hanging on his left arm. "It should be on Cribs or something!"

"Anyway," Rikku interrupted, rightfully taking the lead once again. "As Zexion said, Riku's crap tale has indicated that Axel's suspicions are wrong. _Totally_ wrong, since I _know_ Roxas would never spout half of the mess Riku _insists_ he did. The question is, what are we going to do to fix it?"

"Why do you Haikus insist on 'fixing it'? It's not your business!" Seifer pointed out with a sneer, standing up and shoving Zexion out of the middle so he could be the center focus. "I mean, jeez, you guys should be in a fanfiction or something, _that's_ how farfetched this family is!"

"This family," Sephiroth began quietly (to the fear and astonishment of everyone in the room—well, except Cloud, who was still frowning at Zexion like he was a stranger), "is the best family I've ever known. Be lucky that you're included in a circle this tight-knit."

Seifer fell silent. If was almost as if Sephiroth had brainwashed him to do as he said. Which, as silly as it sounded, the Haiku family was still in debate about.

"Y-Yes, sir."

"Seriously!" Rikku agreed loudly, jumping up and clapping. "I mean, have you met this family? We rock!"

Demyx smiled fondly at his bratty-but-loveable little sister before turning to Zexion with a sheepish expression on his face. "Well…meet the family!"

Zexion returned his smile. "Meet the family," He repeated faintly, mesmerized.

And suddenly, like a light bulb that had just been replaced because a moth had wedged inside of it, Rikku solved the riddle of life itself!

Well, not the riddle of life. But she had solved the riddle of saving Roxas and Axel.

Which, to her sobbing, depressed older brother, was practically life itself.

**12:38 P.M.**

Axel stood rigidly in the light silence of the neighborhood, sitting on his slightly battered suitcase just a couple of blocks away from Roxas' house. He could barely even think, he was so angry at Roxas Haiku. Damn him. Damn him and his crazy, ridiculous, nosy family!

On its own accord, a tear escaped from his left eye. Oh jeez, was he _crying_? No, this was all wrong! The dumper didn't cry over the dumpee! It was supposed to be the other way around, dammit!

He frowned and pulled out his cell phone. He was going to have to call a goddamn cab to pick him up, since Roxas was the one who had picked him up from the airport and drove him to this empty town. Well, okay, it wasn't empty. But it was nothing like New York.

But the weird thing about it was that he had no desire to go back. Not like this. Not because he had to.

Not without Roxas.

"Axel!" A very familiar voice called out to him from his left, and he turned to see a blonde figure running towards him in the distance. Despite himself, his heart practically leapt out of his chest. Was that Roxas?

He squinted his eyes. No. The shape wasn't right, and trust him, he knew all about Roxas' figure. And it was too slender to be Roxas. The boy may be smaller than average, but no one could argue his masculinity.

Oh jeez. It was Namine.

"Hey." She huffed, holding up a finger that he took to mean, 'give me a minute.' When she finally caught her breath, she looked up him shyly, holding out two heavy duffle bags. He frowned. Uh…those weren't his bags.

"They're gifts. The left bag has my gift and the right bag has, believe or not, Cloud and Sephiroth's." She explained, smiling at him sadly. "I guess they don't matter anymore. Well, goodbye, Axel."

Axel stared after her with a dumbfounded expression on his face. This family must be trying to kill him.

Reaching inside the first bag, he pulled out a heavy, large and folded paper. What the hell? He opened it briskly…then wished he hadn't.

On it was a beautiful watercolor painting of him, posing, while Roxas stared lovingly at him in the distance. The pose must have been the picture that Namine had snapped of him earlier. Oh no…his heart felt like it was going to break even more than it already had.

To distract himself, he stuffed the painting back in the bag and quickly opened the second one, warily reaching inside. He wasn't so sure Cloud hadn't put a dead rat in there or something.

But when he pulled out the two items, his breath caught. It was the most beautiful pair of red detailed chakrams that he had ever seen! How did they know he used chakrams? He had never told them what he did for a living.

Then again, Sephiroth was probably psychic or something.

Before he could stop himself, Axel began walking back towards the house. How could he turn away from the Haiku family now? But no sooner did he walk three steps did the taxi cab drive up to the curve.

He stopped. No. He couldn't go back there. Roxas had cheated on him with Riku. He clearly didn't want to be his husband.

Axel resolutely stepped into the taxi. Being without Roxas was going to be hard, but somehow, at some point, he'd manage.

Then he snorted humorlessly.

Even _he_ didn't believe that bullshit.

_**Monday**_**, 12:34 a.m.**

Roxas thought back to his life before he had fully matured; before he was an adult. Exotic dancing was never more than a job to him—just a way to get some much needed money. He didn't quite remember how he got involved with Club Thirteen; all he could remember was that his parents wouldn't fund his decision to go off to college in New York and he was in dire need of that money. He was in dire need of escaping their little town, really.

Okay, maybe secretly he liked the dancing. It had made him feel powerful and sexy, and he was pretty damn good at it. But after a while, it started to make him feel a little dirty. So he convinced the manager of Club Thirteen to let him bartend. It didn't make as much money as the exotic dancing did, but hell, money was money. Eventually he made enough of it to move out of his parents' house and into the city life.

Roxas had no trouble making new friends, getting an apartment, and getting a job at a prestigious architecture company after graduating college. Still, he always felt like something was missing.

When saw Axel, he knew he was the missing piece.

Roxas was always shy around hot guys at first, but this was different. He had been a nervous wreck, way too fearful to talk to him. In fact, he spent a good three weeks going into the store that Axel worked in every single day, buying something he didn't need just so he could watch the sexy man without seeming creepy.

Which, of course, it was. But that didn't stop him.

After Axel had pretended to be stupid to put him at ease, their relationship was the most natural thing in the world. He was never nervous around him again. That was part of why he knew Axel was the missing piece.

"Earth to Roxas!" Balthier, an older man that Roxas worked with at the architecture firm, called out to him, speaking in his deep British (was it British? Roxas was never sure of accents.) voice. He waved a hand in front of his face. "You there, chap?"

Roxas blinked. Damn. He was zoning out again. And on the job, too! "Yeah. Sorry."

Balthier exchanged a glance with their other main coworker, Tidus, who also looked a bit concerned. Roxas sighed. There was no way he'd be able to work like this.

He sat back and tore his glasses off from his face in frustration. God dammit!

_**Tuesday**_**, 9:45 p.m.**

Axel downed his third glass, fuzzily blinking at his friends, Marluxia and Xion. Well, Xion wasn't really his friend, more of Roxas', but she insisted upon coming over to watch him and make sure he didn't do something stupid. So basically, she was spying.

Bitch.

Axel slapped himself. That wasn't nice. But could ya blame him?

"Axel, you've gotta stop!" Xion pleaded, touching his hand and gazing up at him concernedly. Axel scowled down at her. She kinda looked like Sora, who kinda looked like Roxas.

Bitch.

_Gah! Stop it, Axel!_

Axel sighed deeply and allowed his head to slump onto his arm. He missed Roxas. Why did he break up with him in the first place if this was going to hurt this hard? This couldn't possibly be the best solution. Ah, it was too late now. The deed was already done. _They_ were already done.

"Marluxia! He's your friend, too! Do something!" Xion demanded, shooting Marluxia a pointed look. Marluxia shrugged huffily. He was _busy_! Busy painting his nails in Jungle Red, the 'it' color of the season.

"No. Axel. Don't." Marluxia deadpanned, his voice colored with disinterest. Xion let out a short huff of air and took matters into her own hands. She grabbed the glass out of Axel's hands, ignoring his slurred 'hey!' and poured it down the sink. Then she paused. Wait. That didn't smell like alcohol. That smelled like—

"Are you getting drunk off of _apple juice_?" Xion asked incredulously. Axel stared at her stonily and hiccupped.

Bitch.

_**Wednesday**_**, 2:51 p.m.**

"_Hi, you've reached Roxas Haiku. If this is Axel, I'm so happy you called me! I miss you so much! Please, I'm so sorry. I'm miserable without you, Ax. I just want you back, okay? We can—"_

"Roxas, this is Pence. We're all worried about you! This isn't healthy. Just, please, call me back when you get this, alright?"

"_Hi, you've reached Roxas Haiku. If this is Axel, I'm so happy you called me! I miss you so much! Please, I'm so sorry. I'm miserable without you, Ax. I just want you back, okay? We can—"_

"What the hell was that? Roxas, its Hayner. That message was the most pathetic thing I've ever heard, dude. Look…I'm concerned about you, okay? I don't want you doing anything rash, alright? You're my best friend. I need you. So call me back when you get this, loser."

"_Hi, you've reached Roxas Haiku. If this is Axel, I'm so happy you called me! I miss you so much! Please, I'm so sorry. I'm miserable without you, Ax. I just want you back, okay? We can—"_

"Roxas, you're going to make me cry. It's me, Olette. Why haven't you called anyone back? You're not…dead…right? This is stupid! He's just one guy! If you call me back, we can vent together and pig out on Chunky Monkey, okay?"

_**Thursday**_**, 6:30 p.m.**

Axel had finally come to the conclusion that memories were little pieces of evil. The entire time he was supposed to be…working…he couldn't help but remember all of the fun he and Roxas had together.

This sucked some serious ass.

"Pay attention, number 8!" Ansem, Axel's boss, snapped at him, steadying him when Axel went careening backwards due to lack of attention. He nodded glumly. He hated this job.

But he hated being single even more.

_**Friday**_**, 11:34 p.m.**

"…A-A-And…then…h-h-he…j-just…left!" Roxas sobbed around a big glob of Chunky Monkey in his mouth, dressed in the ripped pajamas he'd gotten a long time ago from Axel as a birthday gift. Olette rubbed his back soothingly and fed him another spoonful of ice cream.

"Oh dear…" She fretted, squeezing him closer to her. "It's going to be alright, Rox."

"No it won't!" Roxas snapped before breaking out into a fresh batch of tears. Pence and Hayner rolled their eyes at each other. Even when he was depressed, he was still as snappy as ever.

"So…" Hayner began slowly, fumbling with his cargos. "You said you saw Seifer?"

Roxas paused in his crying to look up at him in bewilderment. "Yeah. So?"

"How was he? I mean, did he look…good?" He dared to ask, and Olette and Pence both collectively recoiled back from him in disgust. Ew! Did he have a thing for _Seifer_ of all people?

"I wouldn't know because I was too busy admiring Axel, not the guy that purposely spilled ice cream on my jeans when we were dating so he could suck me off in public!" Roxas shouted, throwing a pillow at him. Hayner shrugged embarrassedly. Jeez, there was no need for everyone to freak out. He was _just_ asking.

_**Saturday **_

**10:03 a.m.**

"_Hi, you've reached Roxas Haiku. If this is Axel, I'm so happy you called me! I miss you so much! Please, I'm so sorry. I'm miserable without you, Ax. I just want you back, okay? We can—"_

"Hey, Roxas. For the purpose of this message, I'm going to completely ignore that desperate answering machine. Your father and I were talking, and we think it would be a great idea for you and the siblings to all go on a revitalizing retreat! Just call Rikku for details, honey! Bye!"

Roxas listened to his mom's message with skepticism. A retreat? Planned by Rikku? It sounded like another one of her ploys. He shook his head and walked into the kitchen, opening the refrigerator. Damn. It was empty.

He shrugged. That was okay. He wasn't that hungry. But no sooner had he thought this, his stomach growled angrily. Ooookay, maybe he _was_ hungry.

Opening the cabinets, closets, and even the storage room all revealed one truth: he was completely out of edible food. That was weird. He just went to the grocery store two days ago!

Roxas stopped in his tracks. He _was_ known to eat when he was distraught.

Wait a second. Did he eat all of that food in two days?

$500 worth of food?

Eyes wide, Roxas dove for the phone. Okay, he was in need of some serious help. If his sister wanted to take him on a retreat, dammit, he needed to take advantage.

**10:05 a.m.**

"_Yo, this is Axel. You can leave a message if you want. But honestly…I don't really give a rat's ass about you."_

"Um, okay then. Nice answering machine. Anyway, this is Rikku. I was doing some thinking, and I'm pretty sure you're as depressed as Roxas is. If that's the case, I have a suggestion. Why don't you go visit your parents? Roxas is coming to visit again because family is the most important thing to him. Think about it. It might help you."

Axel stopped chewing his ramen noodles (his version of breakfast) to listen to Rikku's message. How did she even get his phone number? Then he thought of how they had tied him up. Clearly, she was a ninja or something.

Maybe she was on to something. He hadn't seen his family ever since he left when he turned eighteen to come to New York. Ansem had heard about his talents and sought him out, promising him a very secretive, very interesting job. The only catch was that he had to move to New York.

Of course, as shitty as his family life was, he jumped at the opportunity.

A small part of him felt bad for leaving his father in their house alone. But Ariel had done the same thing to Reno, and Reno had done the same thing to Axel, so he figured it was the circle of life.

But going back…it seemed way too farfetched!

Still…he had a feeling that home was where his heart was.

**

* * *

**

**Later**

* * *

**2:01 P.M.**

Roxas wanted to vomit. And that didn't happen often, because his stomach was just as strong as he was. But looking at the disgusting surroundings of wherever the hell his siblings were taking him really didn't make him feel rejuvenated. It made him feel even sicker than before!

"Where the fuck are we?" He finally asked, slouching down in his seat so he wouldn't have to look out the window. No one answered him. Everyone in the car was too busy staring outside of their respective windows with horrified expressions coloring their faces.

Roxas dared to take another look out the window. Just as he looked, a man dressed in a purple skirt and nothing else began to hump a pig's ass. Lovely.

"Um, I guess we'd better go ahead and tell you." Sora said timidly, wincing as a teenage boy slammed his chest against his window. "We're here to meet the family."

"Who's family?" Roxas demanded, fearing for the worst. Oh god. In his head he was already doing the math. A sudden trip. A bad neighborhood. A feeling of uncertainty. That could only mean one thing. The family they were visiting was-

"Axel's family." Rikku responded thickly. At Roxas' furious glare, she laughed nervously. "It was my idea. Good thinking, right? Ha ha…"

Roxas stared at her for a long moment before jerking towards the handle of his door, struggling to open it. Escape! He had to escape! This was survival 101! He knew his old professor, Yen Sid, was on to something when he persuaded him to take the course What To Do If Zombies Attack.

"Roxas, no!" Namine, Sora, and Rikku cried, fighting to keep him in the car. Sephiroth, who was driving the car with a nonchalant expression on his face, clearly used to all of the depression and violence, cut a sharp glance to Cloud expectantly.

Cloud just shrugged at him. "What? I already told them this wasn't going to work. Rikku's _always wrong_."

"Dammit, this is going to work!" Rikku shouted as Roxas' struggling feet kicked her in the face. "Would everyone just relax?"

Roxas groaned and went limp in his siblings' arms. "How could you do this to me, Rikku?"

The truth was, Axel himself had never taken him to see his family. Why? Because it was no one's goddamn business who birthed him; that was why. Well, that's what Axel had said at least. But he got the feeling that Axel's family was a little coo coo for cocoa pops.

And now his darling brothers and sisters were taking him to meet them? Axel was going to hate him even more than he already did!

"I miss you." Roxas murmured, shutting his eyes and resting his head against Namine's knee. If Axel was with him, all of this would be bearable. He wouldn't have even noticed that there was bestiality, incest and god knows what else outside of his car window if Axel was next to him; _that's_ how much power Axel held over him.

Sora turned to look at him. "You miss who? Axel? Well don't worry, he's coming too!"

Roxas' struggling to escape began anew.

**2:03 P.M.**

Axel stared up at the rundown, rusty trailer he used to call home with a frown. What the hell was he doing here? This had to be the stupidest thing he had ever done, right before trying to drunkenly milk a cow with Zexion in high school and running around with his friend Vaan, screaming 'I'm Captain Basch!' at the top of his lungs when they found out he wasn't dead.

Before he could knock on the door…or turn to leave…the door slammed open, revealing a muscular, confident redheaded man with dark sunglasses perched carelessly on his nose. Axel scowled. Great. Now he was going to have to suffer in his disgusting old house with the one person who had ditched him when he was a teenager.

"Reno," Axel growled, staring suspiciously at him. "Why the hell are you here?"

Maybe _that_ would intimidate him.

Reno tilted his head at him and laughed, the merriment on his attractive face seeming to brighten the entire area. How annoying. And clearly, he was not intimidated. "'Scuse me Axie, but this is my house too, you know."

"Don't call me that. And you know what I mean." Axel snapped, striding over and ripping his sunglasses off his face.

"Hey!" Reno protested, reaching to grab them, but Axel was, thankfully, a bit taller than him. He cruelly held them over his head, smirking when Reno finally lost the fake chivalry and began growling at him. Ha, _there_ was the Reno he remembered.

"Why are you here…when _I'm_ here?" Axel demanded, deciding to put on the sunglasses just to piss Reno off. "And don't give me some crap answer about it being because you're my brother, since I don't want to hear it."

Reno finally managed to snatch the sunglasses back, but not before growling, "I wanted to meet Roxas."

Axel's mouth dropped wide open. He didn't know what he expected Reno to say, but it definitely wasn't _that_. "W-What? How do you know about Roxas?"

"Got a phone call from my old college buddy, Sephiroth. Said his husband's son was marrying my little brother!" Reno explained, his cunning optimism sneaking back into his voice. "How could I refuse?"

Axel felt a thud at the bottom of his heart, which was starting to happen more and more often. Damn. This was why too heavy for his taste. Also, why the hell did Cloud keep interfering in everything? How convenient that his husband just happened to know his deadbeat, older brother…

"And that made you come running back home? I wasn't even here before; I was at Roxas' parent's house, dumbass." Axel snapped at him, still feeling a little suspicious of him. There was something about this that wasn't clicking. There was a piece missing in Reno's explanation.

"Sephiroth said you guys were heading here after you left his parents' house." His annoying, beaming older brother said with a grin. Looks like he was completely back to normal now. "Duh. Now who is the dumbass?"

Axel frowned. What? He and Roxas had never planned to come back here…

"So where is he? Shouldn't he be here with you?" Reno practically taunted, obnoxiously pretending as if he was searching for him. He squinted at the ground. "Sephiroth _did_ say he was tiny."

Axel rolled his eyes. Lame.

"He isn't here. We—"

"Oh, don't tell me you let another one slip through your fingers. You go through boyfriends faster than you go through socks." Reno snorted. "Is it over?"

Something in Axel shifted and hardened. He didn't know what it was. Stamina? No. Perseverance? Not that either. Or maybe it was determination. Whatever it was, it made him almost ashamed to admit to Reno, the brother who had always tried to keep him down, that he had failed to keep his soul mate. He _couldn't_ admit it.

He _wouldn't_ admit it.

"We're still together. Got it memorized?" Axel smirked, pointing a finger to his temple. "So go find someone else to bother."

Reno's smirk fell just the slightest bit. "Oh? If you guys are together, where is he?"

That stopped Axel for a moment. Damn it. What was he supposed to say?

Jeez, this was turning out to be a terrible fucking movie.

**3:45 P.M.**

"Here we are…" Cloud announced a bit confusedly. He looked from the address, to the house, then back to his directions. "But this is a trailer."

"Duh. Trailers count as houses, Cloud." Rikku pointed out, staring at it in disgust. It was the rustiest trailer she had ever seen. Quite frankly, it was the most _disgusting_ trailer she had ever seen.

"We can't be here, you guys. This is an invasion of privacy." He said worriedly, desperately trying not to remember the look of raw revulsion that Axel had given him the night he left. This was crazy. He was finally meeting his parents after he was rightfully dumped from the love of his life. Some relationship.

"You're right." Namine agreed softly. Roxas peered at her in surprise.

"Really?"

"Of course!" She reiterated. "_We_ can't be here."

"But you can!" Rikku finished with a devilish smirk, and she, Namine, and Sora all banded together to push Roxas out of the car. He landed in the dirt with a heavy thud. What the—

"Hey!" Roxas shouted, quickly standing up to get back into the car. But before he could even touch the door handle, Sora had shut it closed and locked it. He gave him a childish wink. Roxas in turn flipped him the bird.

Stupid twin and his stupid childish games! This wasn't the least bit funny! "Let me back in, you guys!"

"Sorry Roxas. But we have to fix what we broke." Rikku answered sincerely, giving him a little wave. "Good luck! Now step on it, Seph!"

Sephiroth glared deeply at her before complying and speeding off. Roxas watched them go in astonishment. What the hell just happened?

Shaking his head, he turned around and dusted himself off. Well, he was here now. Might as well tell Axel what happened and try to get a ride out of this hell hole. He determinedly walked towards the trailer home, ignoring the putrid smell of dead animal and the sound of arguing coming from inside. He knocked on the door three times.

The door banged open, causing him to nearly jump out of his skin. In front of him stood a beautiful redheaded woman, frowning down at him with a guarded expression on her face. For a moment he wondered why she looked so unfriendly, but after seeing the neighborhood that they lived him, he guessed she had to be.

She had flowing red hair with bangs that framed her pretty face, featuring glittering teal eyes that could rival Axel's in gorgeousness. If Roxas' memory served him correctly, she was Axel's older sister, Ariel, the first sibling to get out of the hellish area they lived in.

"Um, hi." He mumbled shyly, forcing a smile on his face. "I'm Roxas. Is…is Axel here?"

Ariel blinked at him, surprise coloring her face. "You're Roxas? Axel said you were still at your parents' house, planning to come here in a couple of days."

Now it was Roxas' turn to be confused. "What?"

But before he could ask her to clarify, another redhead sauntered to the door, giving him an appraising once over that made him extremely uncomfortable. He leaned against the doorframe and peered at him from above his sunglasses.

"Yo. Roxas, right?" He grinned sexily, and Roxas had to look at his shoelaces to keep from blushing. This had to be Reno, Axel's older, middle brother that left him alone in the trailer home when he was only thirteen. Axel had told him his attractiveness was the only good thing about him.

"Yeah. And you two are Axel's older siblings, Ariel and Reno." Roxas answered, nodding politely at them. "I've heard a lot about you."

Ariel shook her head before giving him a warm smile. "It's nice to meet you Roxas. Would you like to come inside?"

Roxas shuffled his feet. Was that such a great idea? If Axel didn't want him there, going inside was going to ruin things for good.

"Please?" Reno begged playfully, tossing him a wink. Now Roxas couldn't help the blush that erupted on his face. Jeez, no wonder Axel hated him. He couldn't resist _any_ good-looking man.

"Okay."

**4:00 P.M.**

Axel paced back and forth in the trailer, waiting impatiently for Reno and Ariel to come back from answering the door. Who the hell was it, anyway? They were supposed to be having a discussion about what they were going to do when their dad got back from work to see all three of his children back under his roof when the damn doorbell rang, interrupting them.

Ariel's daughter, Melody, gave him a sympathetic look. "I can tell you miss Roxas."

Axel stopped pacing to frown at her. "What the hell? Why does everyone know my business all of the sudden?"

Melody raised up her hands in a defensive gesture. "I was just trying to be nice, Uncle Axel."

"Yeah, I know. Sorry, Melody." He apologized with a heavy sigh. It wasn't her fault her family was fucked up. In fact, this was the first time they had ever even met. But Axel had a weird, uncanny ability to get along with children, even though he swore he would never have one of his own.

"Melody! I'd like you to meet someone very special." Ariel called to his niece from the other room. Axel sighed. Great, now they had a guest. They would never work out this thing with their dad at this rate.

But before he could dwell on it any more, Axel found himself distracted as the entire room brightened. A light stood beside Ariel and Reno, a light that shined a manner that was familiar in every way possible. Was that…?

"Roxas?" Axel gasped, his eyes widening as the blonde came into focus. Roxas blushed and looked away from him shyly. Why was he so timid? That wasn't like him at all.

"Axel, hey. Listen…my family kind of dumped me here on purpose." Roxas began explaining in a rush, giving him a sheepish smile. "You know how they are."

"Y-Yeah." Axel replied, still feeling a bit surprised. He never thought he was going to see him again, not after walking out on him and his crazy family. He figured he was just going to have to keep lying to Reno about Roxas coming here. He never thought he would just show up, out of the blue.

Then again, if Sephiroth was involved, so was Cloud and Rikku. And they had a terrible habit of sticking their noses where they didn't belong.

"Well I'm glad you made it safely." Axel said forcedly, giving him a pointed look that begged him to play along. "Come here and give me a kiss."

Roxas' eyes practically jumped out of their sockets. "Huh?"

"Give your boyfriend a kiss!" Reno laughed, shoving him in Axel's direction. "Unless you guys aren't together anymore. Right, Axel?"

"I told you Reno," Axel gritted out from between clenched teeth. "We're still together."

"W-We're…" Roxas trailed off, still looking confused. Axel rushed to finish his sentence. "Together, Rox."

"Together." Roxas repeated, frowning at him. Axel would've done the same thing if he was in his shoes, but the fact of it was, Roxas was going to have to play along for both of their sakes. Because once his dad got home, all hell was going to break loose.

"Go on. Kiss him." Reno said again, nudging him even closer than he already was to his baby brother. Roxas blinked rapidly as he awkwardly leaned in to his ex-boyfriend. But Axel knew that wouldn't convince Reno that they were still an item. So he did the most logical thing.

He gave Roxas the sexiest kiss he could muster.

Axel yanked Roxas into his arms and pressed his lips to his sensually, running his hands up the blonde's chest and back down, stopping every so often to graze a nipple. In the back of his mind, he registered Ariel gasping and pulling Melody out of the room and Reno letting out an indignant scoff. He had won.

But that didn't mean he planned to stop anytime soon. He slid his tongue into Roxas' mouth, sucking on his luscious lips when he needed a second to breathe, while reaching down and cupping his ass with both hands.

Roxas pulled his mouth away from his and moaned wantonly, a sound that reverberated through Axel's soul. Oh god. _Roxas_.

"Damn!" Reno exclaimed, giving Axel a knowing smile and Roxas an appreciative once-over. "Guess I taught you well."

Axel was in such an emotional state, all he could do was glare at him. "Shut up, already."

Roxas let out a soft sound before stepping out of Axel's arms. The way he was looking at him made Axel's stomach twist painfully. This was hurting him.

"E-Excuse me." Roxas muttered before stomping out of the trailer and back outside. Axel watched him go for a second before cursing loudly and taking off after him. Damn it. He was making this harder than it had to be!

"Roxas, wait!" He yelled after him, managing to reach Roxas before he got too far away from the trailer. It really wasn't safe for him to be walking around by himself in this kind of neighborhood, especially when he was looking so vulnerable.

"I can't do this, Axel! I can't do this with you." Roxas cried, whirling around and glaring at him. His scowl was even more menacing than this tone. "Not with you."

"Do what?" Axel demanded, his own anger slowly beginning to resurface. He hadn't forgotten why he had left Roxas in the first place. He hadn't forgotten about his little affair with Riku.

"Pretend like I don't still…like I don't still love you." Roxas whispered, unable to look at him. "I want you back."

Axel felt the shattered corner of his heart begin to mend itself. Roxas still loved him? But he told him that he didn't! What, had he been lying? Or was he just toying with him?

"But you and Riku—"

"Mean nothing to each other! Riku is in love with _Sora_. And I'm in love with _you_, you oblivious asshole!" Roxas snapped, his frustration practically pouring out of his pores.

Axel stared at him, feeling a little crazed. So the truth was, Roxas was still in love with him. But the question remained…did that solve anything? Was that going to be enough for him to trust Roxas again with his heart?

He just wasn't sure.

"Okay, look. Just stay here with me and pretend like we're still together." Axel replied, pinching the bridge of his nose. Once upon a time, he used to compare his life to different forms of media, wishing his life was like a movie. Now that it was, all he wanted was for things to be normal again.

"So…you don't love me anymore?" Roxas guessed, his whole body falling dejectedly. Axel sighed loudly, shooting him an irritated expression.

"Well of course I still love you!" Axel snapped, grimacing at himself for admitting it. "I just need some more time to evaluate if we can make this work."

Roxas brightened the slightest bit and nodded agreeably. "Fine. And I'll pretend like everything is peaches and crème with your family. But I'm serious about this, Axel. I want you back."

With that, Roxas strode back confidently into the trailer house. Axel rolled his eyes. This was a fucking mess.

**6:00 P.M.**

Dinner was a little different than it was back at the Haiku home that was for sure. Roxas tried to keep a smile plastered on his face, but after the first ten minutes, it was permanently transformed into a frown. This must have been how Axel felt at his house.

From the moment the chicken was brought out, Axel, Ariel and Reno could not stop fighting to save their lives. And every five seconds, one of them made sure to bring him in the middle of it.

"We have to leave!" Axel insisted around his chicken breast, waving it around in frustration. "Dad doesn't want us here anymore, trust me!"

Ariel, the optimistic realist, Roxas had discovered, believed otherwise. "I disagree, Axie. I think dad would love to see us!"

"Don't call me that." Axel warned her dangerously, and Roxas squeezed his thigh to calm him down. He tossed him a grateful, loving half-smile before jumping back into the argument. "I was the last one to leave here, so I know him better than anyone."

"A fact that you constantly remind us of; let the past die already!" Reno snorted before taking a rough bite of chicken. Roxas rolled his eyes. Easily the stupid one of the family.

"Let's just see what happens, that's all I'm suggesting." Ariel pleaded, and Roxas had to agree. There was no point in leaving now. Besides…he was kind of curious to see what kind of man birthed his soul mate.

"Fine." Axel gave up, slamming his napkin on the table and standing up. "Come on, Roxas."

"Where are you going?" Ariel demanded, but fell silent at Axel's unforgiving glare.

"My room. And don't bother us unless dad gets here."

All it took was three steps to reach Axel's room. That was the main problem with trailers.

"Do you see why I hate families?" Axel announced with a bitter laugh, falling onto his bed. "They all suck ass."

"I love my family." Roxas replied quietly, sitting next to him on the bed. "And I think I love your family, too."

"What?" Axel snorted, propping himself up on one arm and looking amused. "Why's that?"

"Because," Roxas admitted softly, "They're apart of you. I love all parts of you, especially the ones that raised you."

Axel did something that rarely happened. He blushed. Roxas had to choke down the victorious smile that threatened to erupt on his face.

"Roxas…" He groaned, covering his face with his hands. "You're making it really hard to stay pissed at you."

"Good!" Roxas laughed, leaning back and giving Axel a soft kiss. "I'm going to spend the rest of my life doing it too."

Axel couldn't take it anymore. Three months, two weeks and a couple of days being celibate made any sort of interaction with Roxas unbearable. So they were going through a rough patch…that didn't mean they had to abstain. And now that they were in _his_ house and not Roxas', he didn't have to hold back from fear of disrespect.

"Come here." He ordered, and Roxas was happy to oblige.

**7:02 P.M.**

"Larxene! Pleeeeeease!" Rikku begged in a dramatically deep voice, holding on tightly to her oldest sister's legs. "Don't you want Roxas to be happy?"

"No." Larxene snapped, kicking her off. "I'm not like the others; I don't need to mess up my little brother's life even more than you guys already did."

Rikku knew she had to take drastic measures. "Sora!" She called out, hopping to her feet and pulling him over to where Larxene was. "Convince her to help!"

Sora gave Larxene a tender hug as he widened his big blue eyes up at her. "Please, sissy? Please help us fix what we broke?"

Larxene frowned down at him before looking up at Rikku helplessly. "Doesn't Riku own a car?"

"It broke suddenly." Demyx answered quickly, hiding the screwdriver that he used to slash Riku's tires behind his back. "You're the only other person that can drive him there."

Cloud, in a burst of bad timing, entered the room with Sephiroth, and Larxene wasted no time in glaring at him. "What about you? You're car surely hasn't broken down either!"

Cloud snorted. "I've done enough already. It's your turn to be the good older child and help your little brothers and sisters."

"Please?" Sora begged again, pouting at her. Larxene scowled and shoved Sora off of her, but not before cursing, "Dammit, go get Riku!"

**7:15 P.M.**

Reno stretched in a catlike manner, grinning up at the ceiling before letting his arms flop back down lazily. He liked to be fully stretched before rocking someone's mind. "So...got a condom?"

His guest, Rude, frowned at him, folding his arms from his side on the couch. "We're not having sex again, Reno."

"Why the hell not?" Reno pouted, running his hands down Rude's chest. "Didn't you have fun last time?"

Rude cleared his throat, shaking his head with force he obviously didn't feel. "Of course I did. But I don't want to ruin our friendship by tacking benefits onto it."

"Can't you just go with the flow?" Reno complained, suddenly not in the mood anymore. Jeez, what did he see in this guy, anyway? Rufus was a much better fuck buddy than Rude. The second they had sex he insisted that they had to stop. Couldn't he just enjoy things?

But before Rude could reply, the front door suddenly opened. Reno gulped. Uh oh. Looks like daddy was finally here.

"Who the fuck is in my house?" His father, with his intimidating frame and even more intimidating voice, bellowed, loading his gun threateningly. Rude immediately stiffened and reached for his own gun, only lowering his hand when Reno frantically explained who it was.

"Hey, daddy…I'm home!" Reno announced flamboyantly, grinning cheekily when his father practically dropped his gun in surprise.

"R-Reno?"

A melodious voice unexpectedly came from their left, as Ariel entered the room followed by Melody. "Reno, do you have a gu…"

Her voice trailed off as her eyes found her father, standing in the front door. "Dad."

"Ariel." He breathed, his eyes jumping back and forth between his children. Then he saw Melody, peering at him from behind her mother's legs. "W-Who is this?"

"This is my daughter, Melody." Ariel answered softly, gently pushing her towards her father. "She's ten years old."

"Nice to meet you." Their father said kindly, clearing his throat as he shook his grandchild's hand. Both Ariel and Reno couldn't hide their beams. Everything was finally functioning like it was supposed to.

And then, of course, it wasn't.

"You all think you can just leave and come back whenever you want to?" Their father demanded, the kindness all gone from his voice. Melody gasped and returned back behind her mother. "How dare you?"

"D-Dad..." Ariel began, reaching out for him. He slapped her hand away from her violently.

"Don't 'dad' me!" He bellowed, practically shaking the entire trailer house. Ariel and Reno jumped. Axel was right. Their father didn't want them there at all. This was a big mistake!

**7: 18 P.M.**

"What was that?" Roxas asked Axel, sitting up abruptly in the bed. Axel's old red sheets slid down his toned, beautiful body like a dream. And that was one dream Axel did _not_ want to wake up from.

Axel pulled Roxas back down onto of him, reaching between them to stroke him to hardness. He moaned hoarsely. It had been a long night. "Who cares?"

"Axel, I'm serious." He breathed, bucking unintentionally as Axel's hand continued to work. "It might be your dad."

Axel froze, straining his ears to listen to what was going on outside of his love bubble of happiness.

"_Dad, please! We heard that Axel was coming here and—"_

"_Axel is here too? Dammit!"_

"_Dad, chill out! We're here to meet Roxas!"_

"_Who the fuck is Roxas?"_

Axel groaned. He tried to warn them, he really did. "My dad is here."

Roxas reluctantly hopped off of him. "Let's go meet him then."

"What? No! You're not going out there. He'll make you cry or something." Axel protested as he pulled his shirt back over his head. Roxas, however, sent him a glower that silenced all of his worries. This was _Roxas_ they were talking about here.

"Let's go."

**7:20 P.M**.

"—and I just want you all to get out…of…my…house!" Their father shouted, shoving Reno, who had attempted to comfort him, away from him.

"Dad." Axel said warily as he entered the room with Roxas, their hands intertwined. "What are you doing?"

"Why did you all come back here? To hurt me?" Their dad seethed, shifting and revealing the beer bottle in his left hand. "Why, dammit?"

"They came because of me." Roxas answered assertively, and Axel whirled around to gape at him. What the hell was he doing? "Roxas, no…"

"And who the fuck are you?" Axel's dad slurred, glaring at him. "Huh?"

"My name is Roxas and I'm Axel's fiancé." He replied honestly as Ariel, Reno and Axel all gasped at his bravery and sincerity. "The truth is, all of this is my fault. If I hadn't been so dishonest with the one person I can really trust, my family never would have come between us. I allowed them to take the blame for my mistakes, and because of it, they brought us here to fix it. I'm so sorry."

Axel stared down at Roxas meaningfully. Did he mean it? He couldn't possibly believe that this was his entire fault! It was both of them. They were in this together.

"I love you." Axel murmured in his ear, kissing his temple tenderly. How could he ever have questioned if they could be in a relationship? He loved this man. This was his soul mate.

"I'm so sorry, Axel! For everything." Roxas answered back softly, before turning to face his dad. "I don't know what happened between all of you, but Axel deserves a much better family than this. You should be rejoicing his return, because he brings such a big ball of happiness wherever he goes."

"Dad, he's right. Let's make a new start for us. We could be happy." Ariel agreed, once again reaching out for him. Only this time, he didn't shove her arm away. Instead, he embraced it.

**8:00 P.M.**

"So by this point, everything should be going smoothly." Rikku predicted wisely, leaning back on the couch with a grin that could rival the Cheshire cat.

"Then what is the point in making Riku go down there?" Sora complained, staring up at the ceiling fan, bored out of his mind. It was always boring when Riku wasn't there.

Rikku tsked. Sora was so young. Even though she was younger than him, she was so much wiser. "Because…by bringing in the catalyst that made them break up, their trust will be put to the test."

"But—"

"If they make it through that, then they'll be strong enough to make it through the rest of their lives together." Rikku answered, shutting her eyes sagely. "Now go fetch me a glass of lemonade."

**8:15 P.M.**

Roxas smiled as Axel, Reno and Ariel laughed hysterically at a memory their dad was dramatically reciting. _This_ was the family Axel deserved to apart of.

He watched Axel with a longing glint in his eyes as he shifted awkwardly on the uncomfortable wooden chair that faced the couch. He would never forget this night; the night he had mind-blowing make-up sex with the sexiest man he had ever seen.

Just the way Axel looked at him aroused him to no end. It was always filled with passion and desire, swimming inside emerald orbs. Oh, and the way Axel held him when he was buried deep inside of him…it was always impossibly tight, but it was the best closeness possible.

And now he was going to have this man all to himself for the rest of his life. Life couldn't get any better than this. _Nothing_ could ruin this high.

There was a sudden knock on the door, which was kind of weird since it was two in the morning, but Roxas didn't want to ruin his good mood with pessimism.

"I'll get it." Roxas offered, leaping up and heading to the door. He could feel Axel's eyes on him. Jeez, there was no need to be worried. It wasn't going to be a murderer or anything.

But when Roxas swung open the door, he realized it was worse than a murderer.

It was Riku. _Again_!

"Riku? What the hell are you doing here?" Roxas hissed, struggling to control his temper. Okay, he was going to have to kick this guy's ass. He just didn't know when to leave him alone! Why did he keep showing up wherever he was?

"Roxas, oh Roxas, I want you back." Riku deadpanned, getting down on one knee. "Will you be my bride?"

Roxas jumped away from him as if he had some kind of disease. "Hell no!"

"Roxy? You okay? Who is it?" Axel called from the trailer living room. Roxas shot Riku a murderous look that said _now look what you did_.

"Well…" Roxas trailed off, trying to think of some way to get Riku away from the house before Axel saw him. Great. Now they were going to be back to square one.

Before he could think of any good ideas, Axel strode over to the door, pausing when he saw the same silver haired asshole that had almost made him stop trusting Roxas forever. Why was he here at his old house?

"You know Riku," Axel started, laughing humorlessly, "Since I'm in such a good mood, I won't kick your ass as long as you turn around and leave."

Riku sighed and stood up, cocking his head at Roxas before pulling a ring from his pocket. "Please just say you'll be my wife, Roxas Haiku."

"Why do I have to be the wife?" Roxas protested, crossing his arms and scowling at him. He was ruining everything. "Just go away, Riku."

"So our affair really meant nothing to you, huh?" Riku cried out in an overly dramatic fashion. Roxas stiffened at the words. He could actually feel Axel's anger radiating from his body. One second, Roxas was turning to him to sooth the beast threatening to erupt, and the next Axel had tacked Riku into the dirt.

A small part of him wanted to let Riku get pounded. Zeus knew he deserved it. Then Roxas remembered all of the great memories he had because of Riku. He didn't deserve it. In fact, this was probably just some ploy Rikku set up to test them or something.

Then he shook his head. Rikku wasn't that outrageous.

"Axel, wait!" Roxas called to him, wincing as Axel gave Riku a good punch in the jaw. "It isn't true! We've never had an affair!"

"I'm supposed to believe that bullshit?" Axel exclaimed, now wrestling with Riku—who, frankly, was now starting to fight back—for control. "Do I look like a fucking idiot?"

"No. You look like the one person on this earth that is supposed to trust me more than anyone." Roxas replied gently, cocking his hip to the side. "And think about it, why the hell would Riku want to marry me? He'd be miserable!"

If Roxas wasn't mistaken, it looked as if Riku was nodding his head.

Axel abruptly let Riku go. "So I'm just supposed to believe you?"

"Yes." Roxas snapped, starting to get a little offended. It shouldn't be _that_ hard to trust him.

Axel shut his eyes and sighed. This was it. This was the moment in their relationship that could strengthen them or blow them to bits. Did he trust Roxas with this?

With their lives?

With everything?

Axel stared at Roxas for a long moment before shaking his head. Roxas' entire body slumped. That was it then.

It was over.

"If I'm going to trust you," Axel began playfully, and Roxas raised his head to look at him hopefully, "You're going to have to be my bride. You have to wear a wedding dress and everything. With no complaints."

Roxas smiled brilliantly and ran over to his fiancé, preparing to hug and kiss him until the sun came up. Axel took one step back, however, and held up one finger.

"One more thing, Roxy."

"What?"

Axel smirked down at Riku unapologetically…then offered him a hand. "Riku has to do our wedding cake."

"Oh jeez, can you guys be any gayer?" Reno called from the door, but all three members of Axel's family were smiling approvingly at them.

Roxas leapt into Axel's arms, wrapping his legs around his waist. He buried his head into the crook of his neck. "I'll love you forever, Axel."

"Roxas, I'll never stop breathing you in. No family will ever make me stop loving you." He whispered back to him.

Roxas smiled. "With our love, we'll make a new family."

Axel snorted and murmured the sentence that would have them laughing for the rest of their lives:

"Just wait until they have to meet _our_ family."

**

* * *

**

Now

* * *

**5:04 P.M.**

"I fucking hate this dress!" Roxas complained loudly, taking an angry bite out of the cupcake Riku had brought him in an effort to calm him down. "I'm a man, god dammit!"

"A pretty man." Demyx snorted, snapping a picture of Roxas in his large, ball gown style wedding dress. Rikku, Namine, Larxene (who practically became BFFs with Axel the second they met at the trailer house), and Ariel seemed to pick the girliest, frilliest, most princess-y dress they could find.

Namine had even managed to do the unthinkable: flatten his hair. It was actually long enough to reach his shoulders! Who knew?

Then, of course, once the hair and dress were perfected, they couldn't leave it well enough alone. So they added make-up, because he wasn't embarrassed enough.

Some family.

"Why are you wearing a dress again?" Sora wanted to know, walking over to where Roxas was posed in front of a large mirror to pat him roughly on the back. "Tell your good brother Sora!"

"Axel won't marry me unless I wear the dress." Roxas gritted out, frowning even deeper as Rikku placed his veil on top of his head. Damn that redhead.

Larxene sighed, her expression mirroring Roxas' perfectly. They were siblings true and true. "I hate dresses, too."

"But you're a girl! Girls have to like dresses!" Sora argued, crossing his arms behind his head, just the picture of ease in his tuxedo. Roxas eyed him in jealousy. He doubted he could even lift his arms in this dress.

"Grow up, Sora." Rikku murmured distractedly, circling Roxas anxiously. "Something's still missing."

Roxas gasped. He almost forgot! He waddled over to his backpack, digging around past the lingerie and multiple lighters to find the precious gift that Axel had given him.

When he found it, his worries and frustrations immediately erased. The Halloween ring. He lifted the ring, which was hanging on a thin silver chain, and held it out to Rikku, smiling when his siblings gasped at its beauty.

"Axel bought you this?" Rikku gasped while Sora lamented, "I didn't realize you could get all that money from prostitution."

"He's not really a prostitute, Sora. That was just Cloud being…Cloud." Namine explained to him with a laugh. Then she looked at Roxas in puzzlement. "What _does_ he do, Roxas?"

"Do we really have to discuss this now? On my wedding day?" Roxas whined, and they all agreed to talk about it some other time.

Hannah Haiku entered the room, holding a box of tissues in one hand. Her eyes watered and her lips quivered. "R-Roxas! You look beautiful!"

Roxas rolled his eyes. "Can't you say handsome or something?"

"Secretly, you love how beautiful you look, and you know it." Hannah sobbed, wiping her tears with a tissue. "I came in here to tell you that it's time."

Roxas practically began hyperventilating.

**

* * *

**

Way, way later

* * *

Some said the wedding was the most beautiful ceremony that the guests had ever seen, arguably because of the bride and the groom's glowing beauty.

Other said the wedding was the greatest love story ever told, because it brought two unlikely people together who had been through some of the deepest trust issues known to man.

But most said the wedding was the most entertaining, crude, inappropriate wedding they had ever attended; all who held this belief said it was because of their families.

Demyx had unknowingly consumed 50% of the wedding cake prior to the ceremonial cutting, claiming that he thought it was for everyone.

Reno had finally convinced Rude to have sex with him again…it just so happened to be while Roxas and Axel were saying their vows. No one could mistake the faint moans that wafted in from the bathroom.

Rikku, Yuna and Paine had stuffed their wedding dresses with tissue in order to look more busty to the guests…it was just unfortunate that the fans happened to be on and blew their tissues onto the guests.

Sephiroth and Cloud glared at Axel the entire ceremony up until the moment he said 'I do.' Just in case.

Ariel, Melody and Namine thought they were helping when they organized the wedding gifts. They were wrong, and ended up losing all of the cards attached with them.

Riku asked Sora to dance during the reception. No one really knows what happened, but by the time Sora left the dance floor, three people were injured.

No, there was no doubt in anyone's mind that Roxas and Axel's families combined were the worst things that could ever be mixed. But what they didn't know was what the bride and the groom knew. And that was that meeting the family brought them deeper in love than they ever would have been just being alone.

And as Axel and Roxas created new memories for themselves, blissfully forgetting the inconsequential moments that could have made or broken their relationship, one thing they never did forget.

Axel and Roxas never forgot meeting the family.

* * *

**And that's all she wrote! Thank you so much for reading! It's been a bumpy ride!**

**Review if you want (it would be appreciated!) but if not-thanks again!**


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